Only the Beginning
by lolo popoki
Summary: After the battle at Toba Fushimi, what might have happened if Kenshin had chosen a different path to redemption?
1. The Message

After the battle at Toba Fushimi, what might have happened if Kenshin had chosen a different path to redemption?

Disclaimer: I don't own anything pertaining to Rurouni Kenshin or Nobuhiro Watsuki except merchandise, and whatever odd situations that might come out of my head.

Wow! I finally did it! My first posted story! I don't know how long it will actually take to finish it, but I hope you will enjoy my attempt. I will warn you right now that this is not an action-oriented fic, so if you don't appreciate drama, I'm truly sorry. It also starts out rather depressing, what with all the angst, but it will eventually have some humor to it. Any and all reviews are welcome, but I am particularly interested in constructive criticism. I would like to know how I might be able to improve.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 1: The Message

-January 1868-

Hiko Seijuro, the thirteenth master of the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu, was bored. Completely, utterly, wretchedly bored. Before his baka deshi's departure five years ago, he never realized just how much of his time had been spent on the little twit…or how enjoyable that time had actually been. Since then, the swordsman's life had slipped into a dreary, mind numbing routine of eating, drinking sake, and sleeping, broken only by necessary chores or the occasional artistic impulse.

On this particular afternoon, Hiko had already finished up his chores, and his muse had not decided to pay him a visit recently. So he sat outside, drinking his sake, and ignoring the bitter cold wind that swept though the clearing. And as they so often did when he was bored, his thoughts drifted back to more pleasant times with a sense of wistful nostalgia.

He missed the days spent training…the insulting taunts…the boy's fiery indignation. He missed their meals together…having someone else to do those hated chores…Kenshin's surprising mischievous streak, and his sweet, innocent smile. He even missed the heated arguments that had plagued their last year together. A hermit Hiko may have been by choice, but even he had to admit that the everyday human contact his deshi had provided him had been rather comforting. It got dreadfully lonely on that damned mountain. Not that he would ever admit to such a thing, however.

Gazing wearily down the forest path that led from his cabin, he wished fervently that Kenshin would come walking down that trail, his head bowed in remorse, begging his Shishou for forgiveness. Hiko, being the "kind" and "understanding" man that he was, would naturally take his errant pupil back…after putting him through a satisfying amount of mental torture first of course. The swords master grinned evilly at the pleasant thought. A nice dream, but not damned likely, seeing as how the boy had always been just as stubborn and mule-headed as his master. Not to mention the disturbing rumors he had heard about the dreaded "Hitokiri Battousai" that his deshi had allegedly become. He truly hoped those rumors were unfounded. Hiko shuddered at the thought of what kind of damage the war might have done to his student's gentle spirit.

He was, therefore, understandably startled when he sensed a rather strong swordsman's ki approaching his location from the very direction he had been staring moments earlier.

_Could it really be_…?

It didn't feel like Kenshin, but who knew how drastically he might have changed these last five years. Probing the ki further, he determined that the man, whoever he might be, did not seem to be hostile. In fact, the mood he was picking up was one of nervousness colored with sadness and regret. Rising to his feet, Hiko set aside his sake jug and stood in front of the cabin, arms crossed in front of his massive chest and his face set in a forbidding scowl, to await his unexpected guest.

The man revealed beneath the trees, while his head was indeed bowed with obvious sorrow, was most definitely _not_ Kenshin. In fact, he was someone that Hiko was sure that he had never seen before in his life. He was somewhat young looking, of medium height and build, dressed like a swordsman, and had long black hair pulled up into a warrior's topknot. Surprisingly enough, the stranger also appeared to be completely unarmed. What kind of swordsman doesn't carry a sword?

Lost in his thoughts, the intruder trudged nearer to Hiko's position, seemingly unaware that he had nearly reached his destination. His head snapped up, startled by Hiko's expectant cough, and his eyes widened slightly in shock as he caught sight of the intimidating swords master towering over him. He swallowed uneasily and bowed deeply from the waist.

"Please forgive my intrusion…you are Hiko Seijuro-san?"

"I might be," Hiko replied coldly, not bothering to return the bow. "Who is asking?"

The man straightened, his composure returning, lending him a dignified air. "I am Katsura Kogorou of the Choshu clan," he stated, meeting the larger man's eyes steadily.

Hiko raised an eyebrow. _Katsura_..._I recognize that name. He's one of the leaders of the __Ishin Shishi, that band of rebels that Kenshin ran off with_. "My baka deshi's commanding officer," he growled, his eyes narrowing ominously. "If you're here about recruitment, then you should leave now. I have no intention of joining either side."

Katsura winced slightly at the icy tone. "I have already been made aware of your feelings on the matter, Hiko-san. At any rate, your assistance is not really necessary. Due largely to Himura-san's outstanding efforts, the Imperialists are now in control of the government. However, the condition of the government is not what brings me out here at this time."

Hiko felt an unexpected spark of pride at his student's accomplishment. After all, the use of Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu to overthrow the Shogunate was the very thing he had been so dead set against... the main issue that had caused master and apprentice to part ways in the first place.

Mentally shaking his head over such an illogical reaction, he curiously watched the rebel leader pull a folded letter out of his wide sleeve. Katsura hesitated briefly, then held the letter out to him.

"Himura-san left instructions for me to deliver this," he said quietly, his eyes downcast, avoiding Hiko's piercing gaze.

"Since when did the Ishin Shishi commander become a messenger boy for his subordinates?" Hiko questioned tersely, an uneasy sensation tightening in his chest. He was suddenly gripped by the feeling that he really didn't want to read what was in that message.

Katsura didn't respond. He merely continued to hold the letter out. After a long moment, Hiko grudgingly accepted the folded parchment. He glanced down, recognizing the abysmal handwriting on the lower corner that was addressed to him. Disturbingly, Kenshin's brushstrokes seemed even worse than usual, as if they had been written by a drunken child.

"Is a return message required?" he asked, clutching the still unopened letter tightly in his hand, his face an unreadable mask.

Katsura shook his head slightly. "No…however, I am sure you will probably have some questions after you finish reading." He then moved a little farther away and turned his back, politely offering the swords master some privacy.

Hiko stared at the letter, almost afraid of what he might find written beneath the papery layers. Bracing himself, he reluctantly began unfolding the parchment. Scanning the first few lines, his heart constricted painfully as his suspicions were confirmed. This was not just a simple letter. It was a suicide note. A heartbreakingly emotional message, laden with pain and self-loathing. He closed his eyes for a moment as a wave of grief swept over him.

_Kenshin_…_why damn it_? _Why_?

Struggling to compose himself, he forced his eyes open and focused on the creased paper in his hands. Silently, he continued to read his student's final words.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Glossary of terms: (most of you should know these by now)

Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu – Hiko and Kenshin's sword style

baka deshi – Hiko's pet name for Kenshin, means "idiot apprentice"

sake – Japanese alcoholic beverage made from rice

Shishou – old fashioned term for master or teacher

ki – life energy or spirit

-san – polite honorific

Ishin Shishi – the imperial rebels that fought against the Shogunate

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I am aware that Hiko may seem a little out of character throughout this story, but keep in mind that it's a very emotional situation for him. He raised the kid for several years; I'm sure it would feel as if he had lost his own son.


	2. Decisions

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Struggling to compose himself, he forced his eyes open and focused on the creased paper in his hands. Silently, he continued to read his student's final words.

Chapter 2: Decisions

_Gomen-nasai, Shishou... I'm so sorry... please, please forgive... oh Kami-sama what have I done? You tried to warn me, to stop me, but I just did not listen. I did not understand until it was too late. I guess I truly am an idiot, the way you have always said. I have betrayed your trust in me, betrayed your teachings. I have misused the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu in my misguided desire to save this country. We may have won, but it is I who is lost. I have lost a part of my soul, and I just cannot seem to find it. An empty shell, a shattered man, a demon is all I am now. The Ishin Shishi leaders consider me a hero? They want to reward me for the part I played in this war? Reward? They want to reward me for murder? I refuse to accept a government position on the basis of man-slaughter. This one is not worthy of such things. My hands... my hands... there is so much blood! The others do not see it, but I know it is there. I can smell it, taste it, feel it sliding down my skin... have I perhaps gone mad? No matter how much I wash, my soul can never be cleansed. I have killed so many; how could I ever go on living with my sins? What else can I do? Death is my only option now. I will send my unclean soul to the pits of hell, which I most certainly deserve. I can hear the dead... their voices screaming, crying out for vengeance. Their bloodied faces and accusing eyes haunt me in my dreams. I only hope that maybe the families of my victims can find some measure of peace from my demise. It will be my apology for the suffering I have put them all through. Now that my job is complete, I will keep the promise I made to my wife... Tomoe, sweet Tomoe... another one of Battousai's victims. One final death... my own... and then I will never be able to kill again. I wish I could have seen you one last time, but I am sure you understand why I could not. We parted on such unpleasant terms, you must truly hate me by now. I just want you to know that I have missed you terribly these last five years. You were like a father to me. Arigatou... thank you for everything you tried to do for me. I'm sorry I was such a failure._

_Dearest Shishou... Sayonara._

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_Oh Kenshin..._

Hiko suddenly felt numb, disconnected. He couldn't feel anything. It was as if a door had slammed shut in his mind, blocking away the threatening onslaught of emotions before they could overwhelm him. He stared blankly at the crumpled parchment before lifting his head.

"When did it happen?" His voice was calm, unemotional.

Katsura started slightly, then turned to face him with eyes full of sorrow. "Sometime last evening," he responded gently. "We found him dead in his room this morning. Okami-san went up to check on him after he didn't show up for breakfast. The poor woman was in hysterics. She had always been fond of Himura, from the day he first arrived. He used to help her out in the kitchen and perform various chores for her and the other servants. It was like losing a son for her."

"How did he...?"

The other man hesitated for a moment. "Seppuku," he said finally. "But, it was poorly done. He made sure it was not a quick or easy death. I think he wanted to suffer as much as he could before he died." Katsura closed his eyes tightly. "He must have lain like that for most of the night, until his heart finally gave out before dawn."

The metaphorical door cracked open slightly at Katsura's words, allowing a feeling of anguish for his tortured student to escape, before Hiko forced it closed again. The only outward sign of his distress was the slight clenching in the muscles of his jaw.

"He mentioned a wife...Tomoe," he said flatly, though in a detached part of his mind he was somewhat astonished at the thought of the woman-shy young man ever marrying. "What can you tell me about her?"

"Yukishiro Tomoe was her name. They were married soon after Himura-san turned fifteen. She died about six months later." Katsura shook his head sadly. "It's a long and tragic story, so I will not go into detail right now. Only that she died accidentally, by his own sword, as she tried to save his life." He sighed heavily. "He made a vow to her that when the outcome of the war had been decided, he would never take another life."

_Only fifteen? Fifteen is much too young an age to have lost a wife, and by his own hand_. A_fter everything that happened to him as a young child...__It's no wonder he ended up so unstable. _

Katsura hesitantly interrupted Hiko's thoughts with a question of his own. "Forgive me, Hiko-san... I regret having to bring this up so soon, but... what kind of arrangements should be made? You are the closest thing he had to family; it should be your decision to make."

_My decision_...?

Hiko remained silent for a long time, his cold, unblinking stare unnerving the smaller man. Without a word, he swiftly turned and disappeared back into the cabin, leaving a slightly bewildered Katsura staring at the empty doorway.

Inside the hut, Hiko was studying the contents of several shelves lined against the far wall. After a moment, he had found what he was looking for. Almost reverently, he reached out and carefully removed a delicately painted urn from its resting place on the shelf.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It had been one of Hiko's best pieces, and Kenshin's favorite. He remembered the boy kneeling silently in the grass at his master's feet, watching in wide-eyed fascination, as Hiko expertly applied the final brushstrokes to the graceful figure that coiled around the urn's smooth surface.

Finally finished, Hiko laid down his brush and proudly held up the completed work of art, being careful not to smudge the still wet paint. "So, what do you think?"

Kenshin was absolutely delighted by the vivid colors and exquisite detail. "Shishou, it's beautiful!" he exclaimed, with all the enthusiasm that only an eleven year old child could manage. A brief pause. "What is it?"

Hiko facefaulted. "Baka deshi! What do you mean 'what is it'? Haven't you ever seen a dragon before?"

Kenshin shook his head, blushing slightly in embarrassment. "Gomen Shishou, I've heard of them from stories, but I've never seen what one looks like." He glanced back at the urn, studying the serpentine figure. "So pretty..." he murmured softly, his eyes bright with admiration.

Hiko sighed. He forgot occasionally, how deprived the boy had been. As either a simple peasant from a poor village, or as a slave, he was most likely never exposed to fine art of any kind.

The swordsman rose to his feet, surprisingly graceful for such a large man, and started inside to put the urn up so it could finish drying. "Well, now you know," he declared brusquely. "Be grateful that your first viewing was due to my own artistic genius."

"Hai!" the student obediently replied, rolling his eyes at his master's conceited declaration, and followed the older man into the hut.

During dinner, Hiko noticed Kenshin's eyes kept wandering back to the colorful urn sitting on a nearby desk. It seemed to hold some sort of fascination for him.

"Shishou?"

"What is it, baka?"

The boy's gaze was still on the urn. "It's not a commissioned piece is it?" he asked tentatively.

Hiko blinked, somewhat puzzled by the unexpected question. "No. Why would you want to know that?"

Kenshin looked relieved. "Then you won't sell it?"

Understanding now, his master smirked slightly as he shook his head. "I won't sell it."

"Arigatou, Shishou."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Absently, Hiko's fingers lightly traced along the dragon's profile, feeling the faintly coarse texture of long dried paint. Of all the pieces that Hiko had created during Kenshin's time there, the boy had always loved this one the most. It seemed only appropriate, that this particular urn be used as a resting place for his deshi's remains.

After wrapping the container in a soft cloth, he tucked in carefully under his arm and swiftly left the cabin to confront the Ishin Shishi commander.

Hiko met Katsura's questioning look with a defiant glare.

"My decision? I'm going to Kyoto with you, and I'm bringing my deshi home."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I was going to post this at the same time as the first chapter, but I decided it needed a little tweaking.

Oh my goodness! I actually got a couple of reviews already! I'm so happy!

Nekotsuki: Thank you so much! I am truly honored to have an author of your caliber actually enjoy my story so far. I will try not to disappoint. Yes, Kenshin may have actually killed himself, but don't worry, Kenshin will make an 'appearance' at some point. I have plans…hehe…

Sailor-Earth13: Thank you for your review! I am glad you like it so far. It is sad for now, but after the first few chapters, the mood should hopefully improve.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Glossary of terms: 

gomen-nasai – I'm sorry

Kami-sama – God

Arigatou – Thank you

Sayonara – farewell (as in "goodbye forever" or for a long time)

Seppuku – disembowelment, Japanese ritual suicide, performed by cutting open the abdomen with a knife. (very painful! In a formal ceremony, after the guy cuts himself, another person beheads him quickly to avoid prolonged suffering.)

face-fault – something you see in anime or manga, where someone just suddenly falls down on the ground when shocked or surprised

Hai - yes


	3. Explanations

Disclaimer: (forgot it in the last chapter, sorry) I do not own Rurouni Kenshin…but maybe they won't mind _too_ much if I just 'borrow' him for a while…

This chapter is mostly just Katsura telling Hiko about what happened during the first year that Kenshin was with them, so I'm sorry if it may be a bit boring. I'm not too happy with how it came out either. It seems a bit stilted. Hopefully the next chapter will make up for this one.

By the way, if any of you are interested in Japanese period novels, I highly recommend a series of books written by Laura Joh Rowland about a 17th century Japanese detective named Sano Ichiro. Beautifully written story lines, and there's also a lot of fascinating information about feudal Japanese customs and culture in them.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 3: Explanations

After they had walked, unspeaking, for almost an hour, Hiko finally broke the uncomfortable silence.

"What was he like?" he asked quietly.

"Nani?" was the somewhat dazed reply. Katsura had been deep in thought, not really paying much attention to his rather unfriendly companion.

"Kenshin…my baka deshi," Hiko clarified impatiently. "I only knew him as a child. He was quiet and serious, yet enthusiastic, devoted, impulsive, passionately idealistic, and entirely too stubborn for his own good. I want to know who he was as a man. I want you to tell me what happened in Kyoto these last five years." He shot the other man a fierce glare. "I've heard the rumors of Hitokiri Battousai, and I want to know the truth behind them."

Katsura considered his response carefully before he answered. "I had regarded Himura-san as an adult when I brought him back from the Kiheitai, mainly due to his amazing skill with the blade. After I had spent some time with him, I noticed that despite his youth, he seemed more mature than many of the other men he served with. I didn't bother to see him as the child he so obviously was.

"Looking back on it all, I regret my hasty judgment. He started out as you said: devoted to his beliefs, passionate and eager. Kind and caring, he wanted nothing more than to protect, to help others. He had such a pure spirit." Katsura clenched his fists, a bitter expression on his face. "And I ruined him. I gave him the job of a shadow hitokiri, an assassin, and watched that eager light in his eyes fade more and more with each assignment." He fell silent, his gaze unfocused, as he recalled those earlier days.

Hiko kept quiet, mulling over what the man had told him so far. He was furious with how the Choshu leader had used his deshi to do their dirty work, but found himself unable to actually condemn the man. War was war. From a practical viewpoint, he was only using the resources he had available to him. In a war-time situation, one could not put an individual's well-being ahead of the main objective. Kenshin, like so many others, was simply just a useful tool…a means to an end.

Also in his favor, was the fact that Katsura was so guilt-stricken about what he had done. That awareness didn't make the swordsman any less angry, however.

Shaking off the past memories with a weary sigh, Katsura glanced briefly at his traveling companion before continuing his monologue. "Himura-san did his job without complaint; even though it was obviously tearing him up inside. He had been rather shy to begin with, but he became even more withdrawn, only speaking when absolutely necessary. In less than a year, he was like a completely different person: cold, unemotional, frighteningly efficient. His glare could freeze a hardened fighter in his tracks and make a lesser man quake in terror. Although Himura would never harm an ally, even his own comrades avoided him out of fear. I was afraid as well. Not afraid **_of_** him, but **_for_** him. He was hovering on the brink of madness, and I feared very much for his sanity.

"Tomoe-san's arrival seemed like such a blessing at the time. He seemed to change a little, finally showing some emotions other than anger. I was amused by how he'd get so flustered around her, so I tried to encourage his interest. I thought a little romance would be good for him. Unfortunately, things got rather tense around that time. We had a spy in our midst, leaking information to the enemy, which led to the slaughter of several of our most important associates. Then there was the Kinmon no hen. Much of Kyoto burned to the ground, including our own lodgings. We all had to lay low for a while, so I sent Himura-san to the country with Tomoe to accompany him as his pretend wife. They decided to marry for real instead." Katsura sighed again, giving Hiko a miserable look. "This is where the story becomes particularly tragic."

He stopped walking briefly to take a quick drink of water from his canteen. His nonstop recitation was making his voice rather hoarse by this time.

Hiko had remained silent during the unfolding drama, listening pensively to Katsura's lengthy account, but the incessant barrage of negative ki coming from the other man was giving the perceptive swordsman a headache. Shooting Katsura an exasperated glare, he decided he needed to try and lighten the dismal mood a little.

"I still can't believe that little baka went and got married… He never even bothered to send me an invitation!" he grumbled in his typically flippant manner.

Katsura gave a startled blink, and then shook his head. "I have to admit, it took me by surprise as well. It was all so sudden." He smiled faintly at the memory of that day. "It was just a quick, simple ceremony; very few people even knew about it, much less attended."

Hiko raised an eyebrow. "I'll bet he must have made a lovely bride," He snorted wryly, a mocking smirk on his face. "Was he prettier than she was?"

Katsura gave a faint, embarrassed cough, and then chuckled softly. "Himura may have been a little too pretty for a man, but Tomoe was a truly beautiful woman. There really was no comparison between the two." He looked thoughtful for a moment. "They sure did make an attractive couple though."

After a short pause, Katsura grinned suddenly, with a sideways glance at his companion. "At least they were about the same height; as tiny as he was, it would have just been too funny if she had turned out to be taller than him!"

Hiko snickered. "The little runt always had been on the small side."

After they laughed for a bit, they both fell silent, feeling a little more comfortable with each other. Hiko was rather amazed to find that he was starting to warm up to the Ishin Shishi commander. Initially, he had wanted to hate the man that had turned Kenshin into a hitokiri and led him down the path to suicide, but Katsura seemed to be completely sincere, and he was surprisingly easy to get along with. It was really no wonder that Kenshin had stayed with him as long as he did. As a rebellious teenager, he would never have followed orders from a man that he didn't respect or agree with.

Feeling Katsura's eyes upon him, Hiko glanced over to see the man studying him with a slightly perplexed expression.

"What's wrong?"

Katsura glanced away uncomfortably, "It's nothing, Hiko-san."

Hiko scowled. "Nothing? With that look on your face? Now tell me, what is it?"

"It's...it's just that you seem to be taking all of this rather well," he murmured cautiously. "I figured you would be a little more upset over the whole situation. Don't you even care?" Katsura studied Hiko's face, curious to see his reaction.

Hiko merely stared impassively at his companion.

"It's simply not in my nature to get all emotional over things," he said at last, abruptly turning away.

_Well, so much for the relaxed atmosphere_, Hiko thought with some annoyance.

It wasn't the fact that he didn't care; because he did care…very much in fact. And yes, it was true that he was not an overly demonstrative person. However, the truth was that he still felt somewhat numb. His more painful emotions were still sealed tightly behind that closed door. He felt almost detached from the whole affair, as if perhaps it was happening to someone else and he was only an interested observer. It just didn't seem real.

Katsura bowed deeply in apology. "Forgive me if I have offended…"

"You have not," Hiko interrupted curtly. "Now, please go on with your story."

Katsura sighed, regretting the tense mood he had inadvertently caused. "Very well, I will continue."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Argh…I wanted to put all the explanations into this one chapter, but I decided to break it here. I'd like to try and keep the chapters to a somewhat similar length if possible. I might just skip most of the details for the last 4 years though. Again, I'm sorry if this chapter sucks.

Whoa…I never expected this many reviews yet! Thank you so much!

Sakura Kamitsu: Thank you for reviewing and for the hug, but are you sure about the spelling for 'no'? I looked it up and I was so sure I had it right…

Babika: Thanks! I'm glad you're enjoying it!

Nekotsuki: I'm really glad that I've managed to hold your interest. I really wasn't sure anyone would like this story, especially with the rather depressing subject matter. I'm really looking forward to your next chapter as well. I'll be so sad when you finally finish.

Rabid Turtle: Thank you for your wonderful review! I'm glad you like it so far. I've always loved the stories where the authors try to dig deeper into Hiko and Kenshin's relationship. They're such an interesting pair. Kind of reminds me of how my grandfather and I used to get along. He threatened to throw me in a dumpster when I was six. He had a very odd sense of humor.

Sailor-Earth13: Thank you again! I'll try not to take too long on updates, but you never know…

Terry-McElrath: Oh my lord! 2 wonderful reviews from another one of my favorite authors! You are just too kind. blushes I'm really glad you like this so far, and I hope you'll continue to enjoy it. I know it is somewhat disturbing. I was really worried that I might offend some people with it. I will admit that it was something I thought about doing quite often at one point in my life. I was lucky to have people who cared about me around though, and they helped me get through it. Poor Kenshin didn't have that kind of support system.

Wistful-Eyes: Thank you so much for reviewing! Hiko's arrival in Kyoto just _might_ have some impact on the final outcome…

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Glossary of terms:

Nani – what

Kiheitai – a militia composed of farmers and merchants organized by Takasugi Shinsaku

Kinmon no hen – a battle that took place on July 19, 1864 in which thousands of Choshu soldiers attacked the imperial palace to try and kidnap the Emperor against Katsura's wishes. The battle lasted only few hours, but much of Kyoto ended up in flames.


	4. Onward

Disclaimer: No, I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.

Sorry about the slight delay…I would have had this out a couple days ago, but I was a little sick over the weekend. Kinda hard to concentrate on writing when you feel like you might throw up. By the way, I'm not eating at Burger King anymore…

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 4: Onward

"Very well, I will continue. But not quite yet," Katsura stated. "We're almost to the edge of the woods where I left my guards. Himura-san had mentioned often that you valued your privacy, so I left them at the base of the mountain so they would not disturb you."

Hiko raised his eyebrow. "How thoughtful of you."

"I would prefer to keep our conversation private, so if you do not object, I will send them on ahead of us to await our arrival in Kyoto."

The swords-master merely shrugged indifferently. "As you like."

A few minutes later, they came up on the squad of waiting soldiers. Hiko took the opportunity to study the small group with a critical eye. There were five of them: all clearly skilled swordsmen…well disciplined and confident in their abilities. Not one of them could ever hope to be a decent match for the Hiten Mitsurugi master. They were extremely fortunate that he was not an enemy.

"Katsura-san!" one of the younger guards called out, as he caught sight of the two men approaching their position. He hesitated for a second after observing the huge, intimidating swordsman that accompanied his boss, then bowed deeply. "You must be Hiko-san. It is an honor to meet you sir!"

"Yes it is, isn't it," Hiko responded smugly, standing tall with his arms crossed in front of his chest in a dramatic pose. "It is definitely a privilege for a person like you, meeting someone as impressive as I am." He smirked, delighted by the irritated expression that flickered over the guard's face. It had been entirely too long since he had someone to annoy.

"You conceited…!"

"Tsuji-san," Katsura interrupted quickly. He shot Hiko an exasperated look, although he was secretly amused by the larger swordsman's arrogant manner. Hiko simply grinned insolently back at him.

"Forgive me, Katsura-san," Tsuji answered, bowing his head in shame. "Please excuse my rudeness; it will not happen again."

"I'm sure it won't," his boss said reassuringly. "However, I need to ask you to do something for me."

The other man straightened immediately. "Of course, sir!"

"Hiko-san and I have a great deal we need to discuss privately along the way, so I need you all to go on ahead of us to Kyoto. I will see you back at the inn."

This statement produced a flurry of disapproval from the bodyguards.

"But, Katsura-san!" one of them protested. "Are you sure that's wise?"

"You might be attacked!" Tsuji cried. "We need to stay with you!"

Katsura sighed. He seemed to be doing that an awful lot lately. "Hiko-san will still be here with me," he responded calmly. "I'll be fine. Please go on ahead."

The five men glanced uncertainly at each other, before finally admitting defeat. "Hai, Katsura-san. Whatever you wish." They began to proceed down the road.

Tsuji paused for a minute and glared threateningly at Hiko. "If anything happens to him…" he left the thought unfinished.

Hiko snorted rudely. "As if anyone could ever get by me. You forget who you're speaking to, boy."

"Boy?" Tsuji began in outrage, then suddenly paled as he remembered who exactly Hiko Seijuro was. "H…hai," he gulped. "I'm sure Katsura-san is in excellent hands!" The guard hastily bowed and turned to rejoin his comrades.

"Ahou…" the swords-master chuckled softly to himself. Oh yes…it had been entirely too long. He truly missed having someone he could tease.

The companions decided to stay at their location, until the guards were far enough away. They shared a quick, simple meal of onigiri that Katsura had brought with him from Kyoto, and then continued on their way to the city.

The two men walked in silence for a few minutes, before Hiko decided to ask a question that had been bothering him since he first laid eyes on the Choshu leader.

"Why don't you carry your own sword?" he asked sternly. "It seems obvious that you're a fairly decent swordsman yourself. Body guards are all well and good, but it just seems rather foolish not to have your own sword with you in case an attacker gets by them."

"I made a promise five years ago," Katsura replied simply. "I am a politician now, not a swordsman. I will not carry my own blade."

Hiko shook his head in disgust. "That's just stupid," he said bluntly. "Politician or not, if you're going to lead others, you should lead by example. You need to let your soldiers see that you're willing to fight beside them…to put your life on the line just the same as they do. Don't rely on them to do all your work for you."

Katsura chuckled. "They won't let me," he said wryly. "Believe me, I have offered before, but my guards were absolutely horrified at the thought." His slight smile faded somewhat. "Especially Himura," he said wistfully. "He was always so protective of me. He refused to let me put myself in danger for any reason, because he said that if I died, than the possibility of a new era dies with me."

"Ah, I see."

"Anyway…where was I, before we got sidetracked?"

Hiko thought for a moment. "Kenshin and Tomoe…tragic marriage."

"Right." After reorganizing his thoughts, Katsura resumed his narration. "I was not able to witness any of the events that occurred, but I did receive reports now and then on their situation, and Himura-san later explained the rest to me.

"They were living in a small cottage outside of Otsu. Himura was pretending to be an apothecary, selling medicines that he made to the villagers. Apparently, married life agreed with him; his emotional wounds started to heal, and he began to relax and truly enjoy the life he was now leading. The two of them started a small garden where they grew vegetables and medicinal herbs, something Himura seemed to really take pleasure in. I imagine it must have been a wonderful change to actually create something rather than to merely destroy.

"The villagers were fond of him. They found him to be a kind, gentle young man, and they appreciated his skill with herbs. The children loved playing games with him and would spend much of their days at the cottage."

Katsura paused briefly and glared down at the ground. "However, our little spy had leaked their location to the enemy," hegrowled angrily. After a moment to compose himself, he continued a little more calmly.

"One day Tomoe disappeared from their home, and a note was left behind, explaining where they had taken her." Himura left to bring her back, but unfortunately fell into a nasty trap. The forest they had led him to, had a rather unusual feature. It is surrounded by a magnetic field strong enough to interfere with ki-sensing, so when the ninjas attacked, Himura was taken by surprise.

"He managed to defeat them all, but during their battles, he was seriously wounded. Also, the ninjas had left explosives behind as barriers to destroy his other senses. He eventually made it to where they were keeping Tomoe, but both his sight, and his hearing had been damaged by the explosions. There was one final man between him and Tomoe, and they fought viciously. Himura, however, was losing the battle, and out of desperation, put everything he had into one final attack, even if it meant he would be killed along with it."

He shook his head dejectedly. "Tomoe saw what was happening and rushed out to attack the other man with her dagger, trying to protect her husband. Himura never saw her coming. So when he struck, his blade cut them both down." Katsura stopped speaking, clearly upset.

Both men remained silent for a while, lost in their own thoughts. Hiko was deeply saddened by the Choshu leader's account. It was truly a tragic story, and he grieved for his student's terrible loss.

_Kami-sama_…_how horrible_

"That's not even all of it," Katsura spoke finally, and turned to face Hiko. "We didn't learn until later, that Tomoe had originally come to Kyoto with the sole purpose of killing Hitokiri Battousai."

Hiko's eyes widened slightly, shocked. "She had wanted to kill Kenshin?"

Katsura nodded. "It turned out that Himura had killed her fiancée, a man named Kyosato Akira, during one of his assignments, and she wanted revenge for his death. Tomoe had originally been part of the plot to destroy Battousai, and was sent to find out his weaknesses." He smiled ironically. "They weren't expecting her to actually fall in love with him.

"She saw beneath the surface, and realized that he was not the cold-blooded, heartless murderer she thought he was. She gave up her quest for vengeance and decided to forgive him."

Hiko was speechless. It was hard to believe that his little baka deshi had been caught up in such a cruel conspiracy. The whole story seemed like something straight out of a Kabuki drama.

"You mentioned that you had heard rumors of Battousai," Katsura gave him a questioning look. "Have you heard anything about the scar?"

Hiko shook his head slightly. "I only heard that Hitokiri Battousai had a cross-shaped scar on his left cheek, but not how he had gotten it."

"The first cut had been from his battle with Kyosato. The second was from Tomoe; her dagger sliced his face as she fell."

The swords-master stared at Katsura in disbelief. "How did…how could…" he paused to collect his thoughts. "That's just uncanny," Hiko said finally, shaking his head. "Her dagger could have hit Kenshin anywhere, but to have it slash precisely across the cut her fiancée left behind…"

"I know," Katsura murmured. "It is pretty remarkable when you think about it." He shivered suddenly as an icy gust of wind blew past. Looking around at their surroundings, he noticed with some surprise that it was starting to get dark already.

"We'd better hurry," he said quietly. "I would like to get back to the inn before it gets too late."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

This part is definitely getting to be a little longer than I expected. But fret not…they will finally reach Kyoto in the next chapter!

And now for my wonderful reviewers! I'm so thrilled!

Dorkfish: Thank you for reviewing, and for passing on Terry's message. I really appreciate it! I hope you won't get too discouraged by Kenshin's death. I promise the mood will improve later.

Sailor-Earth13: I am really glad you're enjoying this story and I hope you'll approve of this chapter too.

Terry-McElrath: Thank you again for youramazing review! I really enjoyed talking to you the other night. And thanks again for all your help!

Rabid Turtle: I am so glad you like my story! I did try to put a lot of thought into how Hiko might handle this kind of situation. Hopefully, I won't make him too OOC. You really should keep up with the poetry; you have a definite talent for it. Yeah, my grandfather was a real character…I wish I had gotten to know him a little better before he died.

JaneDrew: I made you cry? I'm so touched by your reaction! I never thought my writing would ever be able to drive someone to tears (unless the writing was just really that bad ;) I hope you like this chapter too!

Ayumi Ikari: Thank you so much! I'm glad you like my story. I'm really looking forward to your next chapter of "Pure Heart" too. I think your English is just fine…so don't worry about it. I was stationed in Baumholder Germany for a couple of years and I really loved the country. I actually cried when I had to leave to go back to the States…

Unseen Watcher: Thank you for reviewing! I remember reading some of your stories. I especially loved the one where Hiko got hurt by those foreign hunters and Kenshin came to help him out! Excellent story! It's kind of funny that you did review, because I was just thinking a couple days ago that your name would make a good title for one of my upcoming chapters. Would it be okay if I used it, or is that kind of like plagiarism? Oh and thanks for reminding me about Katsura's situation, I wasn't really going to include much about possible attackers, but you've given me a nice idea for the next chapter.

Dark-sephiroth2: Thank you for your comment about 'iya' vs. 'iie'. I think I'll just avoid using it altogether and stick with the English 'no'

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Glossary of terms:

Ahou – moron

Onigiri – rice balls

Kabuki - a traditional form of Japanese theater.


	5. Confrontations

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin - not mine. End of story.

I had a little trouble getting through this chapter for some reason. I had the end of the chapter actually finished, but it took me a while just to fill in how it got there. Hope you enjoy!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 5: Confrontations

After the two picked up their pace, Hiko prompted Katsura to continue his story. "What happened after Kenshin killed them?"

"Despite his injuries, Himura-san somehow managed to carry Tomoe's body most of the way back to their cottage before collapsing in the snow. Luckily, they were found by some of the villagers, and brought back the rest of the way. Himura's wounds were treated, and he was completely healed after a couple weeks. Physically, at least. I don't believe he ever really recovered from his emotional wounds.

"When I was informed of Tomoe's death, I went to Otsu myself to pay my respects and to speak to Himura about his job situation. I told him that he had been replaced as a hitokiri. I had given that particular job to another man, but I explained to Himura that we still needed him to continue wielding his sword for us. But this time, instead of killing from the shadows, we needed him as a guardian. To protect the Ishin Shishi from our enemies as a mobile attacker. And he accepted. He understood that if he stopped fighting then, all the lives he'd taken already would have been for nothing.

"And so, for the last four years, Hitokiri Battousai had not really been a hitokiri at all. He killed only to protect his fellow men and to defend himself from attack. The title of hitokiri, however, stuck with him for the rest of his career. I know that hurt him deeply, though he never really showed it." Katsura sighed heavily, then closed his eyes for a moment and tilted his head up, feeling the cold breeze on his face.

Hiko studied the Choshu leader's profile, as he considered the man's words thoughtfully.

_So, most of what I had heard really was just unfounded rumors_. _Exaggerations of the truth, and outright lies. I knew Kenshin could never have been the heartless demon they made him out to be_

"Why didn't Kenshin object, if the label upset him so much?" he asked, slightly curious.

"I think that maybe he just didn't want anyone to know he was bothered by it," Katsura answered quietly, opening his eyes and staring into the darkening sky. "Himura always seemed so stoic, like nothing affected him, but you could see the pain in his eyes if you really looked." His expression was bleak. "Unfortunately, not many cared to even try. They took his coldness at face value, and kept their distance."

"It sounds like a very lonely existence," Hiko murmured, thinking of his own self-imposed seclusion. It was one thing to be alone by yourself, but to remain isolated while you were surrounded by the people you had sworn to protect... it sounded like pure hell.

"Aa," Katsura agreed sadly. "But he never complained, or let on how lonely he must have been. And despite everything, he remained absolutely loyal to our cause."

Both men fell quiet again as dusk's fading light was finally extinguished, and darkness fell upon them. The rest of their journey was spent in brooding silence, until they had at last reached the city limits.

It had been many years since Hiko had last been in Kyoto, and the swordsman was saddened by how the great city had fallen. Everywhere he looked, he could see the signs of war: burned out and abandoned buildings, mostly deserted streets, and he could feel the tense, uneasy atmosphere that permeated the city. The few people they passed, had a wary look in their eyes, and carefully kept out of the pair's way.

And in the near distance, Hiko could still hear the sounds of battle.

"There's not a whole lot of traffic on this road," Hiko remarked casually. His appearance was relaxed, but all his senses were on alert for danger.

"Most people abandoned the city because of all the constant fighting," Katsura explained. "Kyoto is just too dangerous to remain in right now. Even though the Shogun has abdicated and the Imperialists are in control, there are still conflicts throughout the city between our men and angry samurai." He smiled humorlessly. "Now that the rebels have taken power, we have rebels of our own to deal with." Katsura chuckled, his expression wry. "Ironic, ne? It will probably be a while before the people are all able to come back."

They were walking quickly now, taking a slightly roundabout path through the streets, when Hiko sensed the hostile ki of several men stealthily using the alleyways and side-roads to try and surround their position. He had been aware of their presence for some time, ever since the men had started following them, but he had wanted to see if they would make a move first, before doing anything about them.

"Katsura…"

The Choshu commander glanced over at the swordsman. "I'm aware of them, Hiko-san," he said quietly. "This unfortunately happens quite often. Now you understand why my guards were so upset with my decision for them to leave."

Hiko nodded slightly. "Don't worry; I'll take care of it. There are only eight of them." He made a disgusted noise. "Hardly a challenge for someone of my skills."

Katsura smiled faintly. "Arigatou, Hiko-san."

They continued walking for a few minutes, pretending they didn't notice their unfriendly shadows closing in on them. As the two passed around a corner, they found themselves blocked from going any further by four aggressive looking samurai standing in front of them. Katsura glanced behind him and saw the other four blocking the rear. All eight men had their blades drawn.

"Katsura Kogorou!" their leader yelled in fury. "Imperialist scum! You will die for your crimes against the Shogun!"

Hiko rolled his eyes. Couldn't opponents ever think of anything interesting to say? He handed the wrapped urn to Katsura for safekeeping, and then stepped forward, his hand resting on his sword.

"I don't suppose you would just step aside and let us pass?" he questioned dryly, one eyebrow raised slightly.

The other man scowled fiercely. "You suppose correctly. And because you are sided with that dishonorable trash, you will die as well!"

"Oi!" Hiko snapped irritably. "I am not on either side, I'll have you know. I have no interest in becoming involved in your damned power struggles. However, if you attack, I _will_ be forced to kill you. Take my suggestion, and leave now if you value your pathetic lives."

"Never! **Death before dishonor**!" The four samurai in the front suddenly lunged forward towards Hiko, just as the second group charged at Katsura.

_Damned samurai…never know when to quit!_

Hiko sighed. "Don't say I didn't warn you…" He swept forward with his god-like speed, drawing his katana in a stunning battoujutsu attack. He had already turned and leapt protectively in front of Katsura before the first four bodies hit the ground.

"I'll say it again: leave now or die," Hiko said coldly to the last four as they stood frozen in shock.

The samurai exchanged nervous glances and then faced Hiko once more.

"So be it!" cried one of the men bravely. "We will die in the service of our lord Shogun!" They rushed forward.

Seconds later, the two companions had resumed their passage down the street, leaving eight corpses behind them.

Unspeaking, Hiko took back the urn from a wide-eyed Katsura, after wiping down and sheathing his blade. The Choshu leader stared in awe at the formidable swords-master.

"What you did back there…" Katsura said softly.

Hiko looked more subdued than usual; he hated senseless death. "What about it?"

"You're just like him," the other man stated wonderingly.

"I beg your pardon?" was the insulted reply.

"Not the samurai!" Katsura hastily clarified, "I meant that you're just like Himura-san. Those men that attacked us…he would have done the same thing, in giving them a chance to change their minds. He really didn't care for unnecessary slaughter if it could be avoided."

_Well, that's a relief... __It's nice to see that his moral sense hadn't been completely destroyed by the war_. _Too often, a swordsman might simply forget himself and just keep killing_…_ simply because he can_

Hiko hid his pleased expression, and shrugged indifferently. "Well, I was his teacher after all." He forced an annoyed scowl onto his face. "I'm glad _something _actually penetrated that little brain of his," he said, sounding somewhat aggrieved. "The little brat never listened to anything I told him before he left."

Katsura merely shook his head mildly and changed the subject. "We're almost there, Hiko-san. Just a few more streets to go."

Ten minutes later, they were approaching the patriot's inn. Tsuji was anxiously standing in the doorway watching for their arrival, when they finally came into sight.

"Katsura-san!" he cried in relief. "We were beginning to worry; you took so long to get here!"

The Choshu commander clapped the younger man on the shoulder. "Well Tsuji-san, as you can see, I'm perfectly fine!" he grinned encouragingly. "No need to worry."

"Hai, Katsura-san!" Tsuji turned to Hiko and bowed humbly. "Hiko-san, we are in your debt for bringing him back safely! I would also like to apologize for my rude behavior earlier."

Hiko slapped the man roughly on the back, causing Tsuji to stumble and almost fall. "No problem, kid," he said with a wicked smirk. "Shouldn't you be asleep though? I'm sure it's past your bedtime by now!"

Tsuji bristled. "Kisama…!"

Katsura buried his face in his hands to hide his smile, and groaned in mock exasperation. "You two!"

The light-hearted mood was interrupted by the appearance of a matronly woman at the door of the inn. Her voice was somber as she addressed Katsura, her eyes slightly red as if she had been crying recently.

"Katsura-san, welcome back."

"Okami-san…" Katsura murmured, the smile slipping from his face as he remembered why exactly they were there. "Are the preparations complete?" he asked gently.

"Hai…" she whispered, turning away to hide the grief-stricken expression on her face. "He's ready. We had him laid out in his room." Regaining her composure, she turned to Hiko and bowed. "Hiko-san, we are truly honored by your presence. Himura-san used to speak of you occasionally." Okami hesitated uncertainly, and then asked, "Would you like to see him now?"

Hiko felt an odd fluttering sensation in his stomach, as he and Katsura followed Okami through the inn and up the stairs.

_Do I? Am I really ready to face this? _

During the trip, he had been able to almost convince himself that it was all right…that _he_ was all right. He hadn't seen the body yet; it wasn't real. Now, everything would be different. He would no longer be able to fool himself into believing that things hadn't changed. With each step he took, his apprehension grew, until they were finally standing outside his deshi's room.

Okami bowed once more and walked back the way she had come, respectfully leaving them alone. Katsura placed his hand on the shoji and paused, glancing back at Hiko in concern. He couldn't tell what was going on in the sword-master's head; the large man's face was completely unreadable, and his emotions were too carefully masked.

"Are you ready, Hiko-san?"

Hiko forced himself to nod, but he wasn't ready…not really. He didn't know if he'd ever be ready for this. He didn't want to see…didn't want to confront the truth. His heart pounded madly in his chest as he watched Katsura finally slide the shoji open and enter the room. The swordsman reluctantly followed and then froze at the entrance, as he caught sight of the room's occupant. His heart lurched painfully and he swallowed hard.

"They certainly did a wonderful job," Katsura said softly, staring down sadly at the lifeless figure laid out on the futon.

_Kenshin_…

Suddenly confronted with concrete proof of his baka deshi's death, Hiko's buried grief tried to break through his mental door. Badly shaken, he tried to hide his pain with his usual indifferent expression, but Katsura apparently saw through it this time.

"I know he must have meant a great deal to you." Katsura offered Hiko a sympathetic gaze. "I'll leave you two alone for now," he murmured gently. He left the room, quietly sliding the shoji closed behind him.

Alone at last, Hiko sank to his knees beside the futon and placed the wrapped urn on the floor next to him. Staring miserably at Kenshin's motionless form, he had to admit that they really had done a wonderful job in preparing the body. Dressed in a simple white yukata, with his long red hair carefully brushed out and left loose, Kenshin looked like some sort of lovely angel. The serene expression on the young man's pale face, gave the impression that he was merely sleeping peacefully.

Hiko clenched his fists tightly in his lap, and prayed for his student to open his eyes, desperately wishing it was all just a joke…that Kenshin hadn't really killed himself. He would be horribly angry if it was some kind of hoax, but at least Kenshin would be _alive_…

"Baka…" he whispered brokenly. "Wake up…please…wake up…" Hiko reached out and caressed the scarred side of his student's face in a surprisingly tender gesture, his fingers lightly tracing the crossed lines that marred his otherwise smooth skin. He shut his eyes tightly, overcome by emotion.

_He's so cold_…_so still_

The swordsman opened his eyes to gaze upon his student's ashen face. If anyone had walked in at that moment, they would have seen the rarest sight in the world: Hiko's face, completely free from any concealing mask. The cocky, self-sure, everything-is- going-to-be-fine-because-I-said-so facade he usually wore was shattered by a haunted expression as the reality of the situation finally came crashing down. Kenshin was dead. There was no use in avoiding the truth any longer. His little baka deshi would never wake up again.

He felt as though he was drowning in an ocean of despair. Gathering the lifeless body to his chest, the normally reserved swords-master buried his face in Kenshin's crimson mane, an unpleasantly tight feeling in his chest threatening to choke him. Inhaling sharply, the silken strands tickled his nose with the faintly pleasant scent of recently washed hair. It was all just too much. The door slammed open…and Hiko wept.

He was completely unaware that someone was watching him.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Whoa, my longest chapter by far. I hope it meets everyone's approval. Bit of a warning for next chapter: Hiko is going to get very angry, so there will be some rather nasty language on his part. I will apologize in advance to anyone who is offended by swearing, but I feel that it's necessary to show how strongly Hiko is feeling.

And now for the reviewer responses!

Nekotsuki: Thank you again for reviewing! I'm glad you liked the last chapter!

SiriusFan13: Thank you! I'm so glad you like my story so far! (In my Kenshin's defense about the overly emotional letter: He was a bit drunk when he was writing it ;) I know what you mean about the 'Kenshin died' fics; they usually get me kind of depressed also. I really enjoyed yours too though. Very moving. I hope you add more to it.

Sailor-Earth13: Thanks again! Yeah, poor Hiko needed a bit of comic relief, so I decided to give him a break for a little while. Didn't last long though…

Rabid Turtle: I'm so happy that you're enjoying this story! Thanks for letting me know about the typo, I guess that's what I get for trying to mess with the chapter in 'Quick Edit' because I know it was okay when I first uploaded it. I'll fix it…eventually. I'm feeling too lazy right now.

xZig-zagx: Oh, thank you! I'm really glad that you like this fic and I hope you'll continue to enjoy it!

Melissa: Thanks for reviewing! Yeah, I understand what you were trying to say about the plausibility of the situation. However…things are going to be going in a slightly different direction starting next chapter, so I hope you don't mind if the story becomes a little less realistic.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Glossary of terms:

Aa – casual form of "yes" used by men

ne? – put at the end of a sentence, means "isn't that right?" or "don't you agree?"

Oi! – hey!

Battoujutsu – sword techniques that use the unsheathing of the blade to increase the speed of an attack

Kisama – a rude form of "you" used as a curse

shoji – the sliding doors in Japanese buildings

futon – thin mattress that lies flat on the floor, instead of on a bed

yukata – a summer kimono, can be used to sleep in


	6. The Unseen Watcher

Disclaimer: (sigh) Do I have to say it? I do not own Rurouni Kenshin or any of their affiliates. There happy now? Damn lawyers…

Wow…the response to the previous chapter was overwhelming! I'm so glad everyone seems to be enjoying the story so much. Apparently, I made a lot of people cry! For my first posted work, your reaction was more than I could ever have imagined or even hoped for. You guys have made me happier than I've been in a very long time; I think **_I'm_** going to cry…! Thank you so much for your support everyone! I really hope you continue to enjoy the story after this particular chapter. I had a rather difficult time with it. For some reason, each chapter seems to get harder and harder to get through. By the way, there is really no humor in this chapter, unless you find Hiko's rant amusing, so I hope everyone doesn't get too depressed.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I'm going to do the reviewer section now instead of at the end this time.

omasuoniwabanshi – Thank you for your reviews! I'm really glad you like the story so far despite the character death. Hopefully, this chapter will make it a little better.

Nekotsuki – Thank you again! That was a pretty sad chapter, but I'm going to try to shift the mood somewhat, hopefully in the next chapter. Actually, that 'appearance' wasn't the one I was referring to though, as you'll soon see.

xZig-zagx – Thank you so much! I'm flattered by your response! I think I almost cried myself when I was writing it. Brought up some rather unpleasant memories.

Sailor-Earth13 – Poor, poor Hiko. It's been a really tough day for him. He'll be able to let off some steam now though.

Lucrecia LeVrai – Thank you for reviewing! I'm glad you enjoyed reading my story despite the problems you had with it. I'll try and keep my 'fangirl Japanese' to a bare minimum from now on. I will however, keep a few Japanese words in the story. Also, your complaint on Kenshin's over-emotional letter is valid, so I'll explain my reasoning for it. A mixture of alcohol, and a depressed state of mind, can trigger very uncharacteristic behavior in pretty much anybody - believe me, I know through experience. And about Katsura's knowing everything…I'm pretty sure Kenshin would have told him about the battles with the ninjas and all that, and the part about Kenshin's home life was from talking with the Otsu villagers themselves. As Kenshin's commander, he would want to know everything he could about the situation. Anyway, I hope you'll still enjoy this fic after what I'm now going to do with it :)

SiriusFan13 – Thanks for your lovely review! Heh… I do believe you figured it out… Hope you approve!

Terry-McElrath – Thank you! You don't need to apologize for not reviewing the last chapter. I don't mind! As long as you're still enjoying this fic, I'm happy.

Rabid Turtle – I'm really glad you like my writing! I try to add in the little bits of humor so people don't get too depressed. Not really any humor in this chapter though. Thank you!

Melissa – Don't worry, nothing I add is going to really detract from what has already happened.

Night-Owl123 – Thanks for reviewing! Hope you like this next chapter!

lilmatchgirl007 – I'm really glad you like this so far, thanks so much!

Blaze Coyotlhart – Thanks for your review! I'm glad I could make you laugh in the middle of a depressing scenario!

Ayumi Ikari – Glad to hear from you again! That is pretty funny about your boyfriend living near there… Die Welt ist klein, ja? (did I write that correctly?)

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 6: The Unseen Watcher

After the night he had, Himura Kenshin was most definitely not expecting to wake up that morning. So when he opened his eyes and found himself gazing at the familiar ceiling of his room, he was certainly confused.

_What's going on_? _I thought I was supposed to be dead_… _what happened?_

He sat up cautiously, feeling somewhat disoriented, and glanced around the room, his confusion growing steadily. He vaguely remembered the events of the night before; he could remember the overwhelming despair that had abruptly seized him, and the two letters he had tearfully written. Then came the desperate cut…the sudden agony…his fading strength…the hours spent lying helplessly in a pool of his own blood… Shouldn't he be dead already? The former hitokiri had assumed he would be gazing into the fires of Hell by now…not staring blankly at the familiar four walls of his own bedroom.

And where was the pain? The weakness that had plagued him, as his life drained away? If he wasn't quite dead yet, he should at least feel _some_ effects from his suicide attempt. Instead, except for a faint, light-headed sensation, he felt fine…as if nothing at all had taken place the previous evening.

He glared around at the numerous sake bottles lying scattered on the floor, all of them empty. The young swordsman shook his head in disgust.

_Did I dream the whole thing?_ _Was it all just some terrible nightmare after drinking too much sake? I did go a little overboard last night. Damn_…_I'm such an idiot_

After rising to his feet, he glanced down at his futon… and then froze in wide-eyed shock, his hand coming up to cover his mouth.

_Oh Kami-sama_…_I really _am_ dead_…

Kenshin found himself staring down at his own body.

Hesitantly, he knelt down beside the bloody, motionless figure, and inspected his own corpse with a kind of morbid fascination. To say the view was disturbing would be a huge understatement. Of course he had seen dead bodies before, most of them killed by his own sword, in fact. He had seen so much death in his lifetime that he had become almost numb to the sight. However, this had to be, without a doubt, the most unsettling experience Kenshin had ever had in his whole life…er, existence.

Somewhat dazed, he reached out timidly to touch the lifeless arm. The red-headed ghost jerked his hand back, as if he had been burned, when his fingers passed right through the solid flesh. Kenshin shuddered.

_Okay_…_that's just too creepy _

He stared wide-eyed at his hand and then turned his attention back to the futon. A feeling of terror suddenly gripped him, as the enormity of what he had done broke through his numb shock.

_Oh no_…_What have I done?_

Rising to his feet, the ghost began to back up slowly, his panicked eyes never leaving the unmoving body.

_This can't be_… _Oh gods_… **_What have I done?_**

He snapped his head around, startled, as his guilt-ridden thoughts were interrupted by a polite tap at his door.

"Himura-chan? Are you awake?"

_Okami-san! Oh no, please don't let her come in_…_she shouldn't have to see me like this!_

"Hai! I'm awake Okami-san; please don't open the door!" he called out to her desperately. Unfortunately, it didn't look as if she could hear him.

"Himura-chan?"

The shoji slid partway open, and Okami poked her head through the gap.

"Are you…" she broke off when she took in the grisly scene. Her eyes widened in horror, her face white as a sheet, as she covered her mouth with both hands.

"No…oh no…Himura…" she gasped in disbelief. With an anguished shriek, she suddenly turned and fled from the room, her hysterical cries echoing through the inn.

_Oh dear_…_that didn't go too well_…

Kenshin's legs gave out and he slumped to the floor, waiting for the inevitable. Sure enough, almost immediately he heard shouts of alarm and shock, and the sound of countless bare feet racing up the stairs toward his room. He closed his eyes in despair, burying his face in his hands, as the mob shoved open the shoji to gape in horrified amazement at their comrade's dead body.

The ghost was vehemently cursing himself and his hasty decision to commit seppuku.

_What the hell was I thinking?_ _That's the problem; you _weren't _thinking, now were you? Baka, baka, baka! _

Alas, it was just a little too late for second thoughts.

"Everybody get back! Move!" Katsura pushed himself through the stunned crowd, finally reaching the open doorway. His eyes were full of sorrow as he stepped inside and knelt down next to the bloodied figure. "Oh Himura…what have you done…?"

Kenshin gazed at his boss in remorse. "Katsura-san," he whispered miserably. "Please forgive me…I'm so sorry…"

His commander showed no sign of having heard him. He remained silent for a moment and then whipped his head around to glare at the muttering group of Ishin Shishi behind him.

"Don't you all have duties to perform?" he said pointedly. "Out!"

Eyes wide, the soldiers hastily complied, vanishing back down the hall as if they were ghosts themselves. Not one single person had ever noticed the red-headed spirit right in front of them.

Kenshin sat dejectedly next to his commander, hugging his knees to his chest as he watched the man glance around the room. The Choshu leader's gaze fell on the small writing desk in the corner, where folded paper caught his eye. Rising to his feet, he approached the desk and picked up the two letters.

Opening the one marked with his name, Katsura began to read silently. His shoulders slumped wearily as he finished. Staring at the other, unopened letter in his hand, he sighed.

"Looks like I'm going to be paying a visit to Hiko Seijuro the thirteenth…" He started to head for the exit, then paused to glance back at the crumpled figure of his subordinate. "Himura…" he murmured regretfully, and then turned to walk out the door, leaving the mournful spirit alone with his corpse.

Kenshin rested his chin on his knees and wrapped his arms around his head, staring numbly at the now closed door. He sat like that for some time, trying to pull together the scattered thoughts racing though his befuddled mind.

"I'm dead…I'm really dead…" the ghost whispered softly to himself. "But, what now? Why am I still here?" He hesitated, and then closed his eyes. "What am I supposed to _do_…?"

Motionless, he remained in his position, miserably contemplating his hopeless situation.

Half-an-hour later, he still hadn't moved, only opening his eyes when the shoji slid open again to reveal the patriot's doctor along with Okami. Unseen, he watched curiously as they began to carefully clean and prepare his body for viewing. With remorse, he noticed that Okami's eyes were teary and blood-shot, and she had to stop frequently to keep from completely breaking down. She was weeping silently now, tears streaming down her face as she tenderly brushed out his long hair.

Kenshin closed his eyes tightly, hating himself for her tears.

_Okami-san_… _I did this to you_. _Even in death, I cause so much suffering. I'm so very sorry_…

After they had finished and left, the apparition moved closer to the futon to gaze down on the neatly arranged figure. The face looked so innocent…so child-like. He could see no sign of the horrible deeds that he had committed; no indication that this had been the face of a brutal murderer. For the first time in five years, he saw himself without Battousai's cold mask, and he wondered at the irony of it all: a demon with the face of an angel…

Kenshin pulled himself into a kneeling position and closed his eyes. Clearing his mind, he slipped into a meditative state, trying to calm his troubled spirit. For hours he sat, his new form unaffected by any of the physical discomforts that would normally come with prolonged meditation.

Suddenly, his eyes blinked open in disbelief as he sensed a painfully familiar ki approaching.

_Shishou? I can't believe it_…_he actually came?_

The ghost jumped to his feet and anxiously stared at the door, his meditation forgotten, as he braced himself to see a man he had never expected to see again.

Apprehensively, he watched as the shoji slid open, revealing Katsura first, trailed by the easily recognizable figure of Hiko Seijuro.

_Shishou_…_he hasn't changed at all_…

Kenshin was startled when he saw the swords-master suddenly freeze upon entering, a look of pain twisting his features briefly, as he stared at the laid out body.

_Was that grief I just saw? Does he really care that I'm dead?_

"I know he must have meant a great deal to you," Katsura was saying. "I'll leave you two alone for now."

Kenshin watched Hiko's face intently, as Katsura left, and the swordsman knelt beside the futon.

"Baka… wake up…please…wake up…" Hiko's expression was full of anguish, as he lightly stroked the corpse's pale cheek.

_He really _does_ care!_ _I though he'd hate me_…

He observed his Shishou's rather poignant reaction with some surprise, but nothing could have prepared him for what happened next.

The red-head could only stare, completely dumbfounded, as his usually confident master suddenly broke down into tears, hugging his deshi's body tightly to his chest.

"Shishou…" he whispered, stunned by the uncharacteristic display of emotion. He stiffened in surprise when Hiko's head suddenly snapped up to stare in his direction, his eyes wide.

"Kenshin?"

The spirit stared in shock at his former master.

_Did he really hear me? Can I_…_talk to him_…

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Kenshin?" Hiko stared around at the room in wary confusion. He couldn't see anything out of the ordinary, and his senses weren't picking anything up either; but, he could have sworn that he had heard Kenshin's voice… The swordsman shook his head abruptly as if to clear it.

_I must be more tired than I realized_; _my mind's starting to play tricks on me_

He glanced down at the limp figure still cradled in his arms, and his breath caught sharply. The tight feeling in Hiko's chest returned, and he felt a burning sensation behind his eyes. Blinking rapidly to clear his suddenly blurred vision, he carefully lowered his student's body back to the futon, gently brushing the loose hair from Kenshin's face. The swords-master remained in that position for a long moment, running his fingers lightly through the silky red strands, smoothing them back down. He could feel the tears returning, and tried without much success to hold them back.

_Kenshin_...

A hint of anger began to surface through his despair.

_Kenshin_…_ how could you?_

Swiping irritably at his wet face, he desperately shoved aside his grief, allowing the anger to push completely through and dry his tears.

"Damn it…damn it, Kenshin…you little bastard, how could you do this…?" he muttered bitterly. "You…you selfish, inconsiderate, brainless son of a bitch...!"

Hiko was on his feet now, glaring down at his deshi's body. "What in hell were you thinking?" he snarled as his fury began to grow. "I thought I taught you better than that! Couldn't you see that this wasn't the answer? You fucking coward!"

(Kenshin's ghost was huddled nervously in the farthest corner of the room, well away from his master's wrath. He was thinking fervently that maybe now wasn't exactly a good time to announce his presence…)

"There were people who gave up their lives for you," Hiko railed on as he began pacing restlessly. "Those three girls when you were a child, your wife Tomoe…they died protecting you so that you could live on! But no…you just went and threw that all away! Their sacrifice was wasted…and for what? Some idiotic concept of atonement? Baka! What the hell use is another bloody corpse in this god-forsaken world? You could have done so much more good by helping others while you lived out the rest of your own life!"

The swords-master continued to rant for several minutes, releasing all his pent up resentment and frustration. Feeling worn out from his angry tirade, Hiko finally stopped his agitated pacing, facing away from the laid out body. His shoulders sagged as his rage drained away, leaving him to feel vaguely empty inside.

"Baka…" he whispered bleakly. "You could have just come home; I would have taken you back, you know…"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Well, Kenshin finally made his 'appearance.' His part in this chapter ended up so much longer than I expected, that I was thinking of ending the chapter a little earlier; but I did promise an angry Hiko, so the last part stayed in. So what do you think? Is anybody upset that I'm turning this into something of a ghost story? I noticed that some of you mentioned that you liked the realism of the fic, so I wasn't sure if you'd care for the supernatural aspect. So if you don't approve, I'm very, very sorry.


	7. The Anonymous Artist

Disclaimer: Not mine…never mine…I never get to have anything, it's not fair!

Damn it…I don't know what the heck is wrong, but I've been really sick again lately, so this chapter is later than I intended. Being away from it, I kinda lost the flow of the story and had to go back through the chapter and figure out what to do with it. It changed a bit from what I first intended. Ack! There was too much angst! Poor Hiko needs a break… therefore: Hiko and Katsura bonding over sake…heh… A wonderful opportunity to embarrass poor Kenshin :) The thing with the artist was just an odd thought, and I was actually thinking of turning into a different story (maybe I can turn it into a side story or something?), but I decided to incorporate into this fic to lighten the mood. I've got too many people crying over this story so far…I'm so sorry!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Lot of reviewers for last chapter!

Sailor-Earth13: Glad you didn't mind the twist in the plot! Thank you!

Night-Owl123: I'm glad you liked the ghost part! Don't worry, I have no intention of turning the whole ordeal into a dream at the end. I hate stories that end like that.

Terry-McElrath: Thank you so much! I'm kind of drawing on my own experience for the emotions involved. I've been trying to show that no matter how alone or alienated people feel, there are people out there who care, even if they may not always show it; and that suicide affects not only the victim, but everyone around them as well.

Rabid Turtle: I'm really touched by your response for last chapter. I'm glad my writing had that kind of effect; I wasn't really trying to be depressing! And I'm glad you liked Kenshin's observing Hiko's feelings…He really needed to see how much his master really cared about him.

lilmatchgirl007: Thanks for reviewing! Heh…teaching a ghost the succession technique would be pretty amusing, but probably not possible. There's a little humor in this chapter, so I hope that'll cheer you up!

SiriusFan13: I'm so relieved that I might actually be able to pull this off! I'll try not to disappoint you. Thank you for your comments on the chapter; I'll try to watch out for too modern speech in the future, and I probably won't be using much harsh language again in other chapters. They were just there for emotional effect really. Although I might use the "F" word just one more time in the next chapter. Hiko's fun to write when he gets mad…

xZig-zagx: I'm so happy you approve! Yeah, it is really creepy to think about…I don't think I'd be too happy to see my own body either! Ugh…

Ellie: Well…I have no idea what it would be like to wake up dead, so the hangover thing seemed to be a good idea at the time. There is a purpose to Kenshin's staying behind, but that will be revealed in an upcoming chapter.

crimsonsun-rk37: Thank you for reviewing! I'm glad you like the story!

Justice Stryfe: I don't usually like suicide fics either, generally because they just end it at the death, and don't go into the aftermath. I'm trying to go into detail as to **_why _**it's not a good idea to kill yourself. I'm really happy you enjoy this story so far, and I'm looking forward to your next chapter too!

Hikari Tsuki Chi: Thanks for reviewing, and I totally agree! I just kind of had to get into his head for something like this. I mean, how could I not? :)

a.k.a. Arashi: Wow! Thank you! I'm flattered that you think I have talent, and coming from an English teacher, that's a real compliment! I got the idea from wondering how own family and friends would react if I ever killed myself (one main reason why I never did). Yeah, I do have some amusing scenes planned for the two of them when they do finally meet.

Ayumi Ikari: Thank you! Hmm…haunting the Shinsengumi…I never really thought of that, but it does have possibilities. I'm glad I wrote that correctly; it's been a while since I've used any German, and I was never really all that good at it anyway.

moeru himura: Thanks for reviewing! I had fully intended having him come back as a ghost, even before I started writing the story. I really needed him to be able to see how his reckless decision affected everyone, especially Hiko. I'm glad you like the story even with your feelings on the ghost issue!

skenshingumi: Thanks for your review! I hope you feel better from your injury soon! I haven't really decided if I'm going to bring him back or leave him dead at this time.

omasuoniwabanshi: I'm really glad you're still enjoying my story! No, he definitely won't be reunited with his body (no YuYu Hakusho escape for him!); he's getting cremated in the next chapter. I might bring him back some other way, but I'm still not sure yet. If I do, it will be pretty far in the future.

Sakura Kamitsu: Thanks! Glad you liked it!

camillian: Don't worry, Kenshin's a major part of this chapter! Hiko might not really be able to do anything to a ghost, but Kenshin's fear of his master's wrath was kind of a deeply rooted reaction from his childhood ;) Thanks for reviewing!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

(("Baka…" he whispered bleakly. "You could have just come home; I would have taken you back, you know…"))

Chapter 7: The Anonymous Artist

Hiko walked over to the window and stared silently out into the night. He felt exhausted…both physically and emotionally drained by the day's events.

_This has got to be the worst possible day I've ever had. Not even when I learned the ougi and killed my own master, did I feel quite this bad. And to think, just this morning I was complaining of being bored_… _I would happily take boredom over this any day_…

The swordsman sighed wearily, and turned to face the door, having sensed that Katsura was approaching.

There was a light tap and then: "Hiko-san, may I come in?"

"Aa," Hiko replied listlessly. He couldn't even summon up the energy to put his defensive mask back on. He found that he just didn't care anymore.

Katsura stepped inside and then paused, taking in the sight of the disheartened swords-master with some concern.

"Um…I just finished discussing the arrangements for the funeral. It's best to have it done as soon as possible, so the service will be midmorning tomorrow. It will be a simple service, as you requested…I know Himura would have preferred it that way." He hesitated for a moment and then continued. "Will you be staying up with him tonight? If not, I can see if one of the servants will prepare a room for you to sleep in."

"I'll stay with him," the swordsman said quietly, going back to staring out the window.

Uncertain of how he could comfort the bereaved man, Katsura walked over to Hiko and stood silently behind him.

"You probably wouldn't like to stick around for the wake this evening, so would you care to join me for some sake…while the men pay their respects?" he asked, suddenly feeling inspired.

Hiko perked up slightly at the mention of sake. "Lead on. I definitely could use a drink about now…"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

As the two men left the room, Kenshin was still standing in the corner, frozen in shock from his master's earlier whispered statement.

_He_…_he would have taken me back_…_? All these years I thought he hated me_, _and I could have just gone_…_home?_

Groaning miserably, the ghost sank back down to the floor and stared at the closed door where his master and employer had disappeared.

"I just can't do anything right…" he muttered in disgust.

His glum thoughts were cut short by the arrival of a small group of his compatriots as they entered his room. Kneeling respectfully in front of the occupied futon, they began quietly praying. One of the men, who Kenshin recognized as Kichiro - a young soldier he had rescued from a Shinsengumi attack recently, lit up a stick of incense and placed it carefully in front of the body before he too began to pray.

Kenshin grew uncomfortable as more and more of his comrades arrived to pay their respects.

_What is this? Most of these men never even said more than a few words to me when I was alive. Are they that disturbed by my death?_

Even as he thought this, he was struck by a sudden revelation. All of these men, he had helped in some way over the years… Over there by the window was Adachi Rokuro, a member of a convoy he had helped to protect from an ambush. He recognized Erizawa Susumu, one of Katsura's bodyguards, who had almost been killed by a Shogunate hitokiri before Kenshin had leapt in front of him. Takumi, over by the shoji, he had carried to a doctor after the man had been shot in the leg by a foreign rifle. He had fought side by side with Haru and Tsukahara Kanaye against the Mimiwarigumi. And still more others…

Kenshin recognized them all.

Suddenly feeling sick, the ghost lurched to his feet and staggered towards the door. He couldn't handle it anymore…all these people…it was just tearing him up inside.

_Too much_…_too much_…_I have to get out!_

He steeled himself to push past a soldier blocking the doorway, and ended up walking _through_ the man. Pausing in surprise, the spirit glanced back at the similarly startled soldier.

Shivering slightly, the rebel looked around in confusion. "Damn…it got cold in here all of a sudden."

One of his friends whacked him on the back. "You must be coming down with something Aki; it's too hot in here with all these people…"

Shaken, Kenshin started to turn away, and then paused as his sharp hearing caught a quiet conversation among a group in the hall.

"Oi, who was that big guy that came back with Katsura-san this evening? He's huge!"

"I don't know, but he must be pretty important… Katsura's having a meeting with him in his room right now."

"I heard from Tsuji, that he's Battousai's old teacher!"

The soldiers broke off into excited chatter at this announcement, as Kenshin shook his head in fond amusement.

_Shishou_…_already causing quite a stir among the men_…

The ghost turned and hurried away down the hall toward Katsura's room.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The two men sat quietly across from each other, kneeling on the floor. They had already quickly finished off two bottle of sake in complete silence, and were now halfway through a third. Hiko's expression was still lifeless, his eyes vacant, as he stared into his cup.

"It wasn't all bad you know," Katsura remarked finally, trying to cheer up the depressed swordsman. "Himura had something of an admirer in the company."

After a moment, his words seemed to penetrate the mental fog. Hiko glanced up at Katsura, faintly puzzled. "Admirer?"

Encouraged by the response, the commander resumed his account. "Well, actually more like an obsessed fan…he used to leave little 'presents' lying around for Himura to find. He started around the time Himura turned sixteen, and kept it up for about a year. The man seemed to have the stealth of a ninja, so we never did find out who he was."

The corner of Hiko's mouth twitched slightly, as he felt a flicker of amused curiosity. "What kind of presents?"

Katsura chuckled softly. "All kinds of things really. Fine sake, pastries, even flowers occasionally…all neatly wrapped, with Himura's name on them. Also, about once a month, he would leave a small scroll painting in Himura's room. The admirer was apparently something of an artist, and was fond of using the boy as a model for his artwork. Himura was horribly embarrassed by it all." He shook his head, smiling. "I thought it was quite entertaining."

The swords-master's numb apathy had begun to fade away during the other man's amused recollection. Mentally, he shook his head wryly. It seemed that Katsura was very adept at putting people at ease. It made sense that the man had become a politician. Of course, the sake was definitely helping as well.

_Damn, he's good_… _Heh, Kenshin as a model_; _I wish I could have seen the look on my student's face_…_that would have been priceless!_

His innate good humor somewhat restored, Hiko smirked slightly. "So my baka deshi became an artist's inspiration… Did he keep the portraits?"

Katsura, relieved to see Hiko's improved mood, nodded. "I was kind of surprised, but yes, he actually did keep them." The Choshu leader suddenly blushed. "Especially surprising when you consider the subject matter. Some of the paintings were rather…uh…erotic."

Taking a drink from his cup, the swords-master abruptly choked on his sake, and began coughing violently. "Erotic?" he finally managed to gasp out. "You mean like pornographic?"

_I'll kill that perverted bastard, if I ever find out who he is! How dare he?_

"No, no!" Katsura hastily assured the irate swordsman. "Nothing really explicit! Just…a bit suggestive in nature."

"Ah, I see," Hiko muttered, calming down somewhat, but still not pleased. His eyes narrowed contemplatively. "And Kenshin actually showed these paintings to you?"

"Only a few of them. And I only first learned of them by accident. After that, he decided to confide his concerns to me." Katsura chuckled. "A hardened killer Himura might have been, but he was still something of a naïve teenager. He was embarrassed and confused, and had a lot of questions and fears about the whole matter. Okami-san and I are the only two he ever really confided in at all, but there was no way he was going to go to Okami-san about something so awkward."

Hiko snorted. "I imagine not," he muttered dryly.

"And besides, as I said, only _some _of the paintings were a little risqué. The others were more artistic, and a few were even rather cute." Katsura smiled in remembrance. "There was one in particular, with Battousai holding a kitten, that I thought was absolutely adorable."

Hiko found himself interested by Katsura's descriptions. "You said he kept them, right? Do you know where they are?"

The Ishin Shishi commander nodded, and then rose to his feet smoothly. "He had me put them into storage for him…I'll be right back."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

As Kenshin approached Katsura's room, he saw his commander slide open the shoji and move silently in the opposite direction.

_Hmm_…_I wonder where Katsura-san is going?_

Relieved to see that the man had left the door open (he really didn't think he wanted to try walking through walls yet…people were disturbing enough), he slipped inside and settled in the corner, unnoticed by the room's single occupant.

_Shishou_…

His master had taken a sip from his cup, and was gazing thoughtfully into space, an odd half-smile on his face.

_Well, I'm glad to see he's in a better mood now_ …_although I still don't think he's ready to talk to me just yet_

Katsura stepped back in the room, carrying a tied off box under his arm. He slid the door shut, and sat back across from Hiko. Kenshin felt an uneasy sensation as he took notice of the package.

_Wait a minute_…_ that box looks oddly familiar_…

Suddenly recognizing the box for what it was, the spirit slapped his hands over his mouth to muffle his outraged yelp.

_Katsura! You traitor! How could you_…

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Do you have a problem with mice in the inn?"

Katsura blinked, baffled by the non sequitur. "Mice? No, why do you ask?"

Hiko glanced around suspiciously and then shook his head. "Never mind, I just thought I heard a squeak just now."

The swordsman took another drink of his sake, as he watched Katsura deftly untie the string around the box and remove the lid, revealing almost a dozen rolled up paintings.

Hiko took one of the scrolls and carefully unrolled it. He stared for a second and then burst into helpless laughter. "You're right…that's just too adorable!" he gasped finally.

He had picked Katsura's favorite on the first try. The painting depicted Battousai sitting peacefully on the engawa of the inn, gently petting a tiny kitten on his lap, a rather sheepish expression on his face as he gazed out at the viewer. The artist had a surprisingly detailed, more realistic style that was unlike the more stylized works popular among traditional Japanese painters, and had done an excellent job in capturing the subtle emotion of the scene.

_Very nice_…_maybe_ _I won't kill the bastard after all. He's definitely quite talented_…

He unrolled another painting and then flushed in embarrassment.

_Or maybe I'll still kill him_…

"Katsura! I thought you said he didn't do anything explicit!"

"What do you mean?"

The swords-master handed the scroll over to the puzzled patriot.

"Um…oh my," the Choshu leader stammered, blushing furiously. "Himura never told me about that one…" He hesitated for a second. "At least he's facing away, so it doesn't show anything indecent," he said soothingly, as he handed the painting back.

Hiko muttered something obscene under his breath in reply. Grudgingly, he had to admit that the painting, despite his feelings on the subject, was truly a beautiful piece of work:

Kenshin, completely nude, was kneeling on the floor, his body facing away from the viewer with one hand lightly resting on the katana lying on the floor next to him. His unbound, waist-length hair fell in a bloody cascade down his bare back, and his head was turned to the left side to show his profile, revealing the cross shaped scar and a decidedly predatory gleam in his eye.

The mortified ghost decided it was about time to return to his room. This was just too embarrassing to watch anymore.

_I knew those damn things would come back to haunt me some day, but I never thought _he _would be the one to see them! __It's not like he doesn't already know enough of my humiliations_…

Irritated, he walked out through the closed door, ignoring the strange sensation of passing through a solid object, and stalked off down the hall.

Sighing, Hiko rolled the painting back up and placed it in the box with the others. He smirked slightly, as he thought about what his deshi's face must have looked like when he received that particular piece.

"Why would Kenshin keep something like that if he disliked the content?" he wondered aloud.

Katsura absently responded as he put the lid back on the box and began retying the string.

"I asked him that myself, and he said that even though he disapproved of the subject matter, it would be disgraceful to destroy something that was obviously created by a master of his craft. The artist put a lot of time and effort into each piece, and to simply discard the paintings like so much trash, would dishonor the man's artistic spirit." The commander shrugged slightly. "I'm not sure why, but Himura seemed to have a profound respect for artists in general."

Hiko grinned with smug satisfaction.

_Well, well_…_I guess an appreciation for the arts is something else that he picked up from his time with me_..._ Heh, I must have made quite an impression on him_

"It's getting late," Katsura murmured. "We should get some rest; tomorrow is going to be a rough day."

The two of them stood up and faced each other. Katsura paused awkwardly and then handed the box to Hiko. He bowed respectfully.

"You may keep the paintings if you like. Oyasumi nasai, Hiko-san."

Hiko hesitated before accepting the package. For the first time that day, he bowed back.

"Oyasumi nasai, Katsura-san. Arigatou."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I know…the artist thing was a bit lengthy, and not really involved in the main plot, but I hope you all found it somewhat amusing anyway. Hopefully, none of you minded if I wandered a little off topic for this chapter, but as I said, I just needed to lighten the mood a little. It was just something amusing that popped in my head after I finished reading a fic by neuroticsquirrel, which was a humorous rewrite of episode 78, only with Kenshin as the artist's love interest instead of Kaoru. I actually have mental images for all the paintings Kenshin received, so I plan on describing some of them as Hiko looks at them later, but I can skip it if no one's interested. (Sigh) I wish I could really paint them, but I'm not that good of an artist.

Glossary of terms:

ougi – succession technique, the most secret and powerful move of a particular style. For Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu, that would be the Ama Kakeru Ryu No Hirameki, (wow, what a mouthful!) and the passing down of this technique is fatal to the master.

Shinsengumi – a special police force on the Shogunate's side, that patrolled the streets of Kyoto and tried to keep the peace.

Mimiwarigumi – translated in the anime as the "Kyoto patrol group," they were similar to the Shinsengumi, but not as popular.

engawa – porch

Oyasumi nasai – good night


	8. Revelations

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin is not mine.

Whoops! Sorry, no funeral yet! I decided to put it off for the next chapter. Instead, I decided that this seemed like an ideal opportunity to reveal the reason Kenshin is a ghost, a little early. I know a lot of you are curious as to where this story is headed, so…here you go. I hope it meets your approval! Also, most of you seem to like the paintings, so I'll scatter the descriptions here and there in the chapters when I think it seems appropriate.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 8: Revelations

When Kenshin arrived back at his room, he was relieved to find that most of the men had gone already, and the others were just leaving. After a moment, the ghost was again completely alone, as the last person slid the shoji closed. Giving his body a wide berth, he approached the window and stared sadly out into the dark. Gazing up at the twinkling stars high above, he pondered his uncertain fate once more.

"Why?" he whispered softly. He clenched his fists tightly. "Why? Why am I still here? Is there a reason for all this?"

The red-head felt abandoned…lost…helpless, and confused. He was desperate for answers that apparently weren't going to be given.

"Maybe I was wrong before. Maybe this really is Hell… stuck for all eternity in an existence where no one knows you're there, merely watching…powerless to do anything at all." The ghost paused for a second, deep in thought. He shook his head, his eyes narrowed, as he rejected his theory. "That can't be it; Shishou was able to hear me…"

Kenshin fell silent as he felt his master's familiar presence outside the room, almost as if the man had been summoned by the spirit's words. Hearing the shoji slide open, he turned to watch as the large man hesitated briefly in the doorway before continuing into the room silently, the box of paintings in hand.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

On the way back to his deshi's quarters, Hiko thought about how, in such a short time, his life had been completely turned upside down. In one afternoon, his entire world had completely shattered…his orderly existence had been thrown into total confusion. For the first time in his life, Hiko felt insecure…at a loss. He had never felt so helpless. The death of his apprentice had affected him far deeper than he ever though possible, and for a brief time, he had almost lost himself in the overwhelming depression that had surrounded him.

However, Katsura had managed to drag him out of it, and for that, the swordsman was truly grateful…although somewhat humiliated that the man had seen him reduced to such a vulnerable state. As it was, Katsura's understanding support during this tragic time, had been invaluable. 'Arigatou,' Hiko had said to the man, and he had meant it. Not for the paintings…but for the simple kindness the Ishin Shishi commander had shown him.

He felt calmer now…but he couldn't help but wonder how long such a feeling would last. The swords-master knew that his mood was probably just temporary; the result of good sake and camaraderie.

Preoccupied, Hiko arrived at the room and slid the shoji open. Starting inside, his steps faltered as he once again took in the sight of his lifeless apprentice. Closing his eyes briefly, he forced himself to walk the rest of the way through the doorway into the room.

_It's so hard, seeing him like this…remembering the way he was before. His eyes were so clear…so bright and eager…so full of life. He had loved learning swordsmanship so much…_

Hiko moved to the side and sat, settling back against the wall with a weary sigh. It just wasn't right, that his little deshi had grown up to detest the very thing that that had brought him so much joy in his youth. All the lives he had taken, weighed so heavily on his gentle heart, dragging him down until he could no longer bear the weight of it any longer.

Glancing down, he realized the box was still clutched in his hands. The swords-master hesitated for a moment, before removing the string and lifting off the cover. Even as troubled as he had been by the second painting, he had to admit that he was still curious. Picking a scroll at random, he prayed that it wouldn't be another erotic piece. He got his wish…but the image that he found himself staring at, left him feeling vaguely disturbed, nonetheless.

It was a scene of violence. Broken and bloodied corpses garbed in blue and white, lay strewn across a grassy field…while the figure of Himura Battousai, dressed all in black, stood at the center of it all, looking like an angel of death, his blood-stained sword gripped loosely at his side. But it was not the scene itself that caught his eye; it was the expression of anguished sorrow painted on the young man's pale face, the subtle slump of his shoulders, the hopelessness in his eyes, as he stared at the carnage all around him…the very picture of a man lost in abject despair, aptly reflecting Hiko's glum thoughts of a moment ago.

Gazing at the portrait, Hiko was reminded of Katsura's earlier remark about people not looking past Kenshin's cold surface. However, the artist who painted this scroll…here now was a man who had apparently seen through the hitokiri's mask, and had glimpsed the buried agony in his soul.

Saddened, the swordsman gently rolled the painting up and placed it back in the box. Choosing another, he unrolled it, blinked, and then gave a startled laugh.

Battousai was facing a young, boyish looking samurai in a dark alley. The other man was wearing the same blue and white uniform he had seen in the previous painting, and both were intently staring at the other as they were engaged in a fierce battle of…janken? (rock-paper-scissors)

_Oh Kami-sama…they look just like a couple of children trying to settle an argument! Heh…that artist certainly has a diverse style…cute, erotic, depressing, and now comical…_

Still chuckling, Hiko put the painting back, and closed the box. It would be best to stop now, before he made a poor choice, and ruined his good mood with another disturbing picture.

_I should probably try to get some sleep anyway_

Setting the box next to him, he closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The ghost sighed in relief; he had been worried that his master would pick another one of his more humiliating portraits. Still…Hiko would eventually see them all, and that was definitely something Kenshin was not looking forward to.

He walked over and glared down at the offending box.

_Stupid paintings…should have burned them when I had the chance_

His mind elsewhere, he irritably kicked at the scroll box…and froze as his foot actually connected, sending the object sliding forward to hit the wall with a muffled thud.

_Wha…?_

"What the hell was that?"

Hiko's eyes had snapped open at the sound of the box striking the wall, and he was now peering around the room in puzzlement, trying to find the source of the noise.

Shrugging finally, he settled back down. "Must have been from another room," the swordsman muttered in annoyance, closing his eyes again.

Kenshin stared at his foot in astonishment, and then glanced over at the displaced box.

_I hit it…? _

Concentrating hard, he knelt down, and cautiously poked at the box with one finger. The red-head felt a brief moment of pleased satisfaction as his finger met unyielding resistance.

_Well, well… this is an interesting development. I wonder…_

Kenshin glanced speculatively at his sleeping master, and leaned closer, slowly reaching out his hand. Feeling soft hair beneath his light touch, the ghost smiled.

Hiko however, reacted quite violently. Jerking away with a gasp, he was on his feet in an instant, his sword in hand, as he stared around at his surroundings with wide eyes.

"What the _hell_ is going on here!" he growled, when he determined there wasn't anyone in the room with him. Hiko's gaze lingered for a moment on his student's laid out form, and he shuddered slightly.

"Maybe…?" he murmured uneasily. The large man shook his head sharply. "No. It's just my imagination…"

He sat back down after a minute, leaning back against the wall, but he remained tense and wary.

Kenshin felt a bit guilty for disturbing his master's rest. The poor man obviously needed it.

_I think I should leave him alone for a while_

The ghost slipped out through the wall and into the hallway. Wandering the inn for a few minutes, he finally decided to go for a walk outside.

Out of habit, he kept himself to the shadows, gliding silently through the dark like a cat, all his senses alert for danger. After a moment, he paused, feeling foolish.

_Baka…you're a ghost. No one is going to be attacking you, stupid! They won't even notice you're there…_

Forcing himself to relax, Kenshin drifted aimlessly through the streets. In plain sight, he remained invisible…unseen by the few people he passed. Confident that no one really could see him, he allowed his thoughts to wander.

Suddenly snapping back to awareness, Kenshin glanced around at his location in surprise, finding himself in a familiar graveyard. Somehow, without even realizing it, his feet had taken him all the way from the inn to the site of his wife's grave. He stared sadly down at the plain stone marker and lost himself in the memories of a time, four years past.

_Tomoe…I can never forgive myself for what I did to you and your fiancée. My love, I wonder where you are now?_

"Hello, Kenshin."

The red-haired ghost spun around in shock. He drew in a sharp breath as he caught sight of the vision before him.

"Tomoe…"

He fell to his hands and knees, pressing his forehead against the cold ground in contrition, ghostly tears trailing down his face. He felt a cold hand brush his cheek and settle under his chin, as the spirit of his dead wife knelt in front of him, and lifted his face up to meet her impassive gaze.

"Don't cry, beloved," she said gently. "It's been over four years…you need to stop blaming yourself for my death."

"But…" he whispered brokenly. "But, I murdered you…my hands are stained with your blood…it was my fault!" Desperately, Kenshin grabbed her hand with both of his, and held it to his face, relishing the comforting sensation of physical contact, as he closed his eyes. He bit back a choked sob as he was surrounded by the scent of white plums.

Tomoe shook her head. "Technically, I am at fault for putting you in that situation to begin with. If I had not made a deal with those men to kill you…"

"No!" Kenshin opened his eyes and tightened his grip on his wife's hand. "I could never blame you for that!" He choked again. "Wh…whatever the circumstances…it was still my sword that killed you!"

"I am the one who ran in front of your blade…I made that decision on my own," the dark-haired spirit said firmly, as her husband gazed at her sorrowfully. "And," she added with a faint smile. "I was happy to do it."

"Happy?" he whispered dubiously, releasing her hand. "How…why…?"

"I was able to save my second love with my death…and, as a spirit, I have been reunited with the first."

"Kiyosato…"

She smiled again. "Hai, Kiyosato." Her expression turned more serious. "He does not blame you either…for either of our deaths."

Kenshin looked skeptical. "I can't believe that."

"Believe it, because it is true. He is aware, as are most of your victims in fact, that in war, it is 'kill or be killed.' In the midst of battle, one must die for the other to live. The men you killed, have been watching you, and have seen how much you suffered for your actions…and so, bear you no grudge. And in my case, Kiyosato saw clearly that it was an accident on your part." She reached out and brushed her fingers across his scar. "He also saw how deeply you loved me, and he is grateful that you were able to give me some measure of peace after his own death."

"Death…" He suddenly blinked. A feeling, almost like relief, swept over him. He wasn't the only one! He wasn't alone!

"Then both of you are spirits, like me?"

"Not like you," she murmured with regret, as she rose gracefully to her feet. "We are true spirits, while you are merely a ghost. There is literally a world of difference between the two. Spirits, like myself, inhabit another plane of existence, free to pass between the worlds as they like. Ghosts are bound solely to the physical world, shadows of the people they once were, unable to move on to the spirit realm. Some are trapped in a prison of their own making, because they cannot accept the reality of their own death; but they have the opportunity to move forward once they have come to terms with their loss. Others, like yourself, are left behind as punishment, only able to move on once the gods have decided their punishment is over."

Kenshin stood and bowed his head. "So, I'm being punished…"

"Yes. You were _not_ supposed to die yet," she said rather pointedly, her eyes narrowed as Kenshin blushed slightly. "And so the gods have decided that this will be your sentence, as well as your purpose."

"My sentence, I can see, but my purpose…?" Kenshin shook his head, bewildered. "What _is_ my purpose? What exactly am I supposed to do?"

"You wished for atonement, did you not? Your original purpose was to go forth and continue to help the people of Japan…now that you're dead, the situation has been changed somewhat, but in some ways, your purpose remains the same."

The red-haired apparition stared at his former wife in disbelief. "Help the people of Japan…? How can I possibly help anyone in my condition!"

"You may have noticed that you do have some ability to affect things in the living world - you just need practice - but there is a reason why your master can hear you. It gives him the opportunity to be your conduit to the physical world, should he choose to do so."

"What?" he gasped. "My conduit? I don't understand…"

Tomoe sighed in exasperation. "You might be able to accomplish your mission alone, but it would be easier not to. Most individuals are unable to see or hear ghosts, so you could use someone to assist you…to interact with the public in your stead. A partner."

Kenshin gaped at her. "Shishou would never go along with this plan!" he said finally. "He didn't even want me to go out to help the people in the first place!"

"Because he knew what would happen!" Tomoe's spirit said sharply. "It's true, he didn't want you to leave, but only because he knew you were not ready yet…and because the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu is supposed to be wielded to protect the people as a free sword, not under the command of another!"

The ghost bowed his head in shame, knowing what she said was true. He hadn't been ready. He hadn't been prepared for the repercussions of his decision. He may have set off with good intentions in his heart, but he had gone about it all wrong. He had foolishly allowed himself to be used, and in his carelessness, had done more harm than good. He knew that now.

Tomoe's eyes softened as she gazed at her stricken husband.

"He needs you, Kenshin," she whispered gently.

His head snapped up, a dazed expression on his face. "What…?"

"He will never admit this fact, not even to himself, but Hiko Seijuro desperately needs your help. Somewhere in his life, he lost his purpose. When he took you in, you gave that back to him. Raising you…teaching you…you gave him motivation. When you left, he felt lost, but he was still hopeful you would return someday. With your death, your master's purpose has been shattered." Tomoe paused, her gaze sympathetic.

"After the funeral," she continued. "He will probably return to his mountain, and to his lonely life of bitter isolation, completely shunning the rest of the world. But this time, he won't have the optimism of your return to ease the devastating loneliness."

"Shishou…" Kenshin whispered in dismay.

"And that brings me to the other part of your assignment. With his helping you to redeem yourself, you will be helping him to find his purpose. He needs a new mission in his life, and you will once again help him to realize it." She smiled. "Your partnership would be mutually beneficial."

Overwhelmed, Kenshin remained silent, mulling over her words carefully.

_I had no idea he felt that way... Shishou needs me...? But, can I really help him? _

The ghost shook his head sharply.

_It doesn't matter if I can or not…I have to _try_! He is suffering because of me…I can't just leave him alone to endure that! _

Kenshin turned his attention back to his wife, his eyes full of resolve. "How do I go about my mission? What are my orders?"

Tomoe shook her head. "There are no orders; this is not the military. The exact method will be up to you to decide. And even if you are somehow unable to convince your master to help, your mere presence will be a comfort to him; just remember to be yourself. As for the people of Japan…you will find another way. I believe in you."

The red-head looked determined. "Thank you for believing in me, Tomoe. I will try my best not to disappoint you." He hesitated for a moment, his expression somewhat self-conscious. "Um...when do you think would be a good time to approach him? And also, I know Shishou can hear me already, but is there any way for him to see me? It might be a bit disconcerting for him to have a conversation with a disembodied voice."

"Don't worry. You will know when to reveal yourself; your master will be able to see you, when that time comes. You just have to want him to." Tomoe paused, eyeing him critically. "You might want to consider changing your clothing before you make the attempt, however…" she smiled faintly, one eyebrow raised.

Confused, Kenshin glanced down at himself, and then blushed slightly. He had spent the whole day in the baggy, poorly fitted yukata he used to sleep in. How had he not noticed that? Knowing his master, he'd probably end up mercilessly ridiculing his apprentice's undignified appearance. Of course, Hiko would undoubtedly find other things to tease him about…

"How do I change?"

"Just concentrate on wearing something different," she answered, and then sighed regretfully. "I am sorry, but I must go now, beloved."

"Please don't go, Tomoe!" Kenshin pleaded desperately. "I've missed you so much…"

Stepping in front of her husband, Tomoe took his face gently between her hands.

"I know," she murmured, as she stroked his cheek fondly. "But, do not worry…we will see each other again, soon. I still have much to explain to you."

With a final soft caress, Tomoe released his face and stepped back. She vanished silently, leaving the forlorn ghost standing in the middle of the deserted cemetery…the graves of the buried dead, his only companions.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Good lord…can you believe, 8 chapters, and it's still only been one day for them? So…what do you think? Does this chapter meet with everyone's approval? I really hope so! I rewrote it like 3 times before I was satisfied…although, I'm not sure if **_I_** even really like it that much…

Terry-McElrath: Glad you liked the chapter and the paintings! I wish I had copies of them too… I think the mouse bit was my favorite part in that chapter.

Nekotsuki: I'm so glad I didn't lose you with the ghost scenario! I like it when people are honest with me, so please let me know if you have any suggestions for improvement, or if you feel I'm getting a little carried away. Thank you so much! By the way, when's your next chapter of TJ coming out? Those 'ninjas' still bothering you?

Rabid Turtle: Yeah…crazy chapter :) I'm happy you liked it though! Sorry about the delay on the funeral, this chapter just kind of got away from me…

Night-Owl123: Don't worry, I'll have more of the painting descriptions scattered around in the chapters.

Sailor-Earth13: Yeah, Kenshin did not find it amusing at all! I was thinking about maybe bringing the artist into the story, but I'm not sure…

skenshingumi: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it! I'm sure most people have things that they would rather not have come out into the open when they die…skeletons in the closet, and such.

Hikari Tsuki Chi: I'm so sorry you're sick, I hope you feel better soon! Glad you found the chapter funny though!

SiriusFan13: I've seen that picture before too…Kenshin's so cute as a chibi! I'm really happy you liked the chapter…and no, Kenshin is not gay in this story. You don't really have to thank me for responding to your reviews because I actually enjoy doing so. It gives it more of a personal touch, and kind of like having a conversation…but not :)

omasuoniwabanshi: Probably not going to be a reincarnation fic ( I know what you mean about Wolf's Rain…that really pissed me off). I'm glad you liked the humor! About that painting…the artist never actually _saw_ Kenshin naked. He just had a good imagination ;)

xZig-zagx: I thought that was pretty funny myself, us updating on the same day. I'm so glad you're still enjoying this story! And I'm looking forward to your next chapter as well!

lilmatchgirl007: Glad you liked it! I'm sure he would be pretty broken up about it, if I bother to include him…don't know yet.

Freda Potter: Thank you! I really appreciate your support! Luckily I haven't had any problems with homophobes.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Glossary of terms:

janken – also jan-ken-pon or commonly known as rock-paper-scissors (there are records of the game as early as 200 BC in Japan)


	9. Changes

Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.

Oh for crying out loud! How hard is it to write a bloody funeral scene! This funeral is seriously kicking my ass, so once more, I'm going to have to apologize for delaying it for a bit. I'm not sure exactly why writing the funeral is so hard; too many bad memories, perhaps…and maybe because trying to find information on funerals from that era is extremely difficult. BTW: I want to thank omasuoniwabanshi for the information she was nice enough to send me on traditional Japanese funerals. Thank you so much! The funeral should be in the next chapter for certain (but with my luck…). This chapter contains my first try at a bit of an action scene (Hiko and the samurai didn't count – too quick) so hopefully I didn't do too bad… and also some stuff dealing with Kenshin's abilities.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 9: Changes

When Okami rapped on the shoji the next morning, inquiring as to whether he wanted breakfast, Hiko had already been up for several hours. He had dozed fitfully for most of the night…unable to get much sleep after his unsettling experience that evening. An experience that had left him slightly on edge, and still somewhat fatigued by the time she arrived.

Stepping out into the hallway, Hiko closed the shoji carefully behind him, considerately sparing the woman from catching sight of Kenshin's body.

Okami's sad gaze lingered briefly on the shut door, before turning to the swordsman and bowing respectfully.

"Hiko-san," she murmured. "Breakfast is going to be served shortly. Katsura-san wished to ask you if you would mind eating with him in his quarters." The woman paused briefly. "If you would prefer not too, I can arrange for a meal to be brought up to your room."

"No need for that," Hiko responded quietly. "Katsura's room will be fine."

She nodded. "Katsura-san is currently out at the moment, with some last minute preparations, but he will be with you shortly, if you would care to wait for him there."

"Arigatou, Okami-san."

Bowing again, Okami walked silently down the hall, and disappeared around the corner.

Hiko sighed wearily, the last of his tension draining away. The funeral was supposed to be held around midmorning. Before too much longer, it would be all over. He would be heading back to his secluded cabin, with Kenshin's ashes, to resume his dreary, miserable existence. The swordsman closed his eyes for a moment, a sudden feeling of loneliness washing over him. He was not looking forward to his return; the empty hut would seem even emptier, knowing that Kenshin would never step foot in it again…

_Oh Kenshin…_

With a forlorn glance back at his deshi's room, Hiko turned and headed in the same direction Okami had gone, altering his course slightly to arrive at the Choshu commander's room. He paused to knock briefly, making sure the room was indeed vacant, before sliding the door open and entering. With a soft sigh, he drifted toward the window and gazed out appreciatively at the inn's neatly kept garden. Even in the chill, bareness of winter, the elegant and fragile appearance of the carefully tended trees and hedges was somehow soothing. In spring, with the trees in full bloom, the view most likely would be quite beautiful. Idly, Hiko wondered if Kenshin had ever been able to relax enough to enjoy the lovely sight in front of him.

Smiling wistfully at the peaceful scene, the swords-master let his mind drift, bringing back fond memories of his little red-headed apprentice.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kenshin had stayed away from the inn for the remainder of the night, just wandering the city, carefully mulling over Tomoe's words. Now that he had gotten over his initial shock and subsequent resolution, he was trying to work out how exactly he was going to go about his new mission.

_What can I do to help people as a ghost? If Shishou refuses… what do I do? I know I do have some ability to interact with my environment, but how can I use that to my advantage?_

By the time the sun had risen, he still hadn't come up with any useful ideas. Groaning in frustration, he yanked on the end of his topknot.

"Concentrate, baka! How can I make this work for me?"

Still nothing. The ghost sighed, shaking his head in disgust, and decided maybe it was time to head back to the inn. His funeral was supposed to be held sometime after breakfast, and in view of what Tomoe had said, he wanted to keep an eye on his master during what was most likely going to be a difficult experience for the older man.

_I never realized…how much Shishou really cared for me. He never really showed it when I was growing up; I was actually beginning to wonder why he bothered to adopt me in the first place..._

Walking down the street, Kenshin suddenly paused as he caught sight of movement on one of the roofs. Deciding to take advantage of his invisibility, he leapt up onto the edge of a neighboring rooftop and silently made his way over to where he had noticed the slight motion. The red-head was surprised by what he discovered.

_A ninja! What's he doing out in the day? Isn't he worried that someone might see him?_

Following the ninja's line of sight, all he could see was a small temple across the street. Kenshin suddenly stiffened in shock, as four familiar men exited the building.

"Katsura!" he gasped in alarm, as he saw the ninja abruptly shift, drawing out a handful of shuriken. In a moment of blind panic, the ghost didn't even think, as he reached out his hand, and shoved the ninja as hard as he could, before the man could hurl the deadly weapons.

Flailing wildly, the startled man lost his balance, and fell off the roof with a pained yelp, catching the attention of Katsura and his three bodyguards. Swearing viciously, the ninja leapt to his feet and drew the short sword strapped to his back, as two of the guards ran forward, the third staying behind with the commander. Tsuji reached the attacker first, bringing his katana around to deflect the ninja's blade, while trying to use his wakizashi to pierce the man's side.

However, the ninja swiftly dropped low to the ground, easily avoiding both strikes, and darted forward to slash at the guard's legs. Tsuji barely managed to dodge, the blade slicing through his hakama, while the other guard attempted to take advantage of the ninja's distraction to press his own attack. Again, the agile man easily sidestepped the sword's path, kicking out with his foot and catching the other man right beneath the ribcage.

Kenshin watched in horror as the young soldier doubled over, unable to breathe…leaving him helpless as the ninja once again rushed forward, his blade flashing, ready to slice open his opponent… Desperately, the red-head flew towards him, dropping to the ground and knocking the ninja's legs out from under him with a sweep kick.

With a startled cry, the ninja stumbled clumsily; and the blow that was meant to behead the guard, merely cut across the young man's left shoulder instead. Tsuji quickly stepped forward and ran the attacker through before he could regain his balance.

"Yuasa!" he cried, kneeling down next to the wounded man. "How bad is it?"

The other guard shook his head weakly, his hand tightly gripping his bloody shoulder, as he smiled up at his friend. "I don't think it's too bad, so don't worry about it."

"Baka," Tsuji muttered, relieved. "Be careful next time; we don't need to be losing anyone else right now…" He reached out and grabbed his friend by his uninjured arm and helped him to stand up.

Katsura and the third guard hurried over, warily keeping an eye out for any more threats. Concerned, the Ishin Shishi leader examined Yuasa's wound carefully, murmuring apologies as the young man flinched from his superior's prodding.

"This may not be too serious, but it is bleeding badly," Katsura said. "We should hurry back to the inn and get the doctor to fix this up quickly." He sighed heavily. He shot an irritated glare at the motionless ninja, and glanced back over at the temple. "Damn…this changes everything. Looks like we're going to need an alternate plan."

Tsuji nodded gloomily, and turned to assist his friend as the four men hastened down the road.

During their conversation, Kenshin had remained standing over the ninja's body, staring down with a troubled expression on his face.

_Does this count as killing? I may not have cut him with my own sword…but my actions caused his death… Have I broken my oath already? _

Stricken, Kenshin buried his face in his hands, and started to turn away, but abruptly froze as he heard a sharp gasp from the supposedly lifeless man.

_He's not dead!_

Staring wide-eyed, he saw the ninja roll over on his side and start coughing. Blood spattered the ground in front of him.

_That might not last much longer though... How can I help him? Wait…_**should**_ I help him? He did just try to kill Katsura-san…_

He straightened, his eyes set in stubborn determination. His mission was to help people, and enemy or not, this ninja was still a person. But what could he do…? Thinking furiously, he suddenly recalled that there was a clinic not too far from his location. Running back down the street, he stopped in front of the clinic's entrance, and hesitated uncertainly.

_Now what do I do?_

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Still reminiscing, Hiko found himself blinking back tears.

_Damn it… I'm so tired. It's making me way too emotional._

Starting to turn away from the window, he suddenly noticed a commotion at the far end of the garden. Katsura and three of his bodyguards had just rushed through the gate, and were trying to catch their breath. One of the guards was clutching at his left shoulder, where Hiko could clearly see a growing red stain beneath his hand.

_What the hell!_

Alarmed, Hiko cast out his senses for hostile ki, but couldn't sense anything close to the inn. Apparently, the guards had taken care of the problem already.

He watched as Katsura sent Tsuji off with the injured man, most likely to find the doctor, and began speaking urgently with the group of soldiers that had rushed out of the inn when they saw the disturbance. After a moment, they scattered off to perform whatever tasks that they had been assigned, and Katsura stayed behind to speak briefly with Okami, who looked distressed. She shook her head at something he said, and with a quick bow, she hurried away. The commander headed for the inn with a slightly relieved expression on his face.

_I wonder what that was all about?_

Concerned, Hiko turned to face the door when he sensed the other man's troubled ki approaching. Katsura entered the room a few minutes later, his expression frustrated.

"What happened out there?" Hiko asked anxiously.

Katsura clenched his fists, as he began pacing angrily. "We were attacked by a ninja on the way back from the temple," he growled. "Looks like we're going to have a change in our plans. The services are going to have to be held here in the inn's courtyard, instead. We don't know how much enemy activity is in that area, so it's much too dangerous to risk having a funeral procession." Katsura scowled. "Damn it!"

Hiko's fatigue started to return, and he sighed wearily. "Is this going to be a problem? I'm sure my idiot student would care less, whether his services are held in a temple or not."

The smaller man stopped his restless pacing, and shook his head slightly, his anger fading. "No, it's not really a problem…I've talked it over with Okami-san, and she doesn't mind if we hold it at the inn. The preparations are being dealt with, and I'm arranging to have the priest brought back here. It's just…it's just that I wanted to give Himura-san a proper funeral…he deserved that much at least," he murmured unhappily. "It's bad enough that we had to rush things along like we did." The Ishin Shishi leader rubbed his face tiredly. "This damn war is just taking too much of our time and effort…"

He glanced over at the swords-master, finally noticing his own haggard appearance. He gave him a wry smile. "You look like you got about as much sleep as I did. Rough night?" he asked sympathetically.

Hiko glanced away uncomfortably. "I'm fine…" he muttered.

Katsura shot him a skeptical look. He started to say something, but was interrupted by the arrival of a servant girl with the breakfast trays. Sighing, he smiled slightly. "Oh well, I guess we might as well eat while we wait for any news."

They ate their meal in silence, both men lost in their respective thoughts. After they finished, Katsura placed the trays outside the door. Settling back down, he stared at his distracted companion for a long moment.

"Are you really all right?" he asked with some concern. "Forgive me if I sound rude, but you look terrible."

"I'm fine," Hiko said again, with a slight edge to his voice. Looking up at the commander's troubled expression, he relented somewhat. "I just want to get this over with," he sighed.

"Understandable," Katsura murmured gently. "I imagine this last minute delay is not helping, either. It might be late afternoon by the time the funeral is underway."

Hiko groaned.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_What do I do! I have to hurry!_

Scanning his surroundings frantically, Kenshin's gaze finally rested on a small stick lying on the ground.

"Ah!"

With intense concentration, the red-haired ghost managed to pick up the stick, and began scratching a message into the ground, grateful that this area had dirt roads. Jamming the stick into the packed earth so it stood up straight, he turned and pounded loudly on the door.

After a moment, a middle aged man slid open the door and poked his head out. Not seeing anyone, he frowned slightly and went back inside.

"Damn it!" Kenshin growled in frustration. He pounded again on the door.

The man slid the door open almost immediately, and stepped outside, glaring around.

"All right you! Stop this foolish…" He broke off, as he took notice of the upright stick in the ground and saw the words written in the dirt. "What the…?"

The ghost waited impatiently as the man knelt down and carefully read the message, anxiously wondering if the ninja was even still alive by now.

Finished reading, the older man stuck his head through the open door and called for someone inside. A much younger man, obviously the doctor's son, stepped out of the building. After a hurried conversation, the two ran down the road in the direction that Kenshin had indicated in the note, the spirit keeping pace right behind them.

Skidding to a halt when they caught sight of the injured figure, the two men approached cautiously, and knelt beside him to assess the damage.

At first, Kenshin was afraid they were too late, as the man was so still; but he was reassured to see that the man was still breathing, although rather shallowly. The ninja was merely unconscious.

Father and son carefully lifted the man from the ground, supporting his weight between them, and headed back to the clinic.

"Father," the young man said quietly. "Do you think he'll make it?"

Kenshin waited restlessly for the answer.

The older man smiled. "Aa," he murmured. "It may take a bit of work, but I think he just might pull through."

Dazed, the ghost stood staring, as the clinic door closed behind the three men.

_I did it…_

Sagging in relief, Kenshin actually grinned, feeling almost giddy from his successful endeavor. This feeling… he hadn't felt anything like it since before he had left the mountain…such a wonderful feeling of accomplishment! As the ghost closed his eyes, an odd sensation building up inside him, he threw his head back…and for the first time in almost five years, Himura Kenshin laughed.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Terry-McElrath: That was such a wonderful review! I am really glad you're still enjoying this fic! As for when Hiko and Kenshin finally meet face-to-face, it will **_probably_** be in the next chapter, some time after the funeral. Also, I think I'll actually reveal who the artist is as well. Quite a few people have been asking about him, so what the heck.

Nekotsuki: Yeah, I had Tomoe make an appearance. How could I not, really? I think it's almost required in this situation :) Thanks again for the Kiyosato correction! Still haven't fixed it yet…I'm lazy :)

Ellie: Yup! Interesting twist indeed! Do you approve?

Sailor-Earth13: I'm glad you find it interesting! Hope you continue to enjoy it!

Night-Owl123: I got a real kick out of imagining that painting…glad you liked it! I don't know about meeting the Kenshin-gumi quite yet, but I am thinking of including Saitou in some way.

Peacebunnie: Thank you for reviewing! I'm glad you like it so far! You find it addicting? Wow…I'm flattered!

xZig-zagx: I'm so glad you're still enjoying my story! I put a lot of thought into Tomoe's character, so I'm hoping I managed it okay. Glad you liked the painting too! Did they take your story down again? Bastards… (growls)

SiriusFan13: Thank you! Your favorite chapter so far? I have to admit, after rereading it a couple times, I think I'm actually happy with it now. I wasn't quite sure before. Thanks again for your Saitou suggestion!

A lilmatchgirl: I see you've changed your name… I don't have Kenshin jealous of Kiyosato, because all he wanted was for Tomoe to be happy; and if she's happy with her fiancée, that's good enough for him. I like Tomoe too; I never understood why so many people hated her so much… That movie, "Ghost"… I don't remember a whole lot of it, because I saw it so long ago; but when you mentioned it, I remembered that one scene where he and Demi Moore are playing with the clay. That just brought up a rather disturbing image in my head, you know, what with Hiko being a potter…Oh God… ((shudders and starts slamming head against the wall))

Blaze Coyotlhart: Welcome back! I know what you mean about having your parents monopolizing the computer… My dad used to practically live on the net! Unfortunately he died last year…I would much rather fight him for the computer… Anyway, to answer your question: I'm still not sure if I'm going to bring him back or not, but going back in time to change events, would negate everything he accomplished, so definitely not something like that…

Rabid Turtle: I'm glad you liked the Tomoe/Kenshin interaction! I put a lot of thought into that, so I'm glad I seem to have pulled it off.

omasuoniwabanshi: I'm so happy you still like this story! The story is kind of a mix between the two of them, but yeah, Hiko is going to be something of the main focus. He's one of my favorite characters too, and I was always disappointed that he wasn't really given much time in the series. Thanks again, so much, for your assistance on the funeral issue! I was going crazy trying to find anything at all, and that article was very helpful.

a.k.a. Arashi: Thanks again for your nice review! I'm really glad you like the direction this fic is headed. Hiko really needs to get off that mountain and actually **_do_** something with his life! The reunion should be in the next chapter, but I'm not guaranteeing anything, seeing how that usually ends up…

Ridicully L: Thanks for reviewing! Glad you liked the pictures!

Swirly: Thanks! Yeah, it's kinda sad, but hopefully once Hiko and Kenshin are reunited, I'll have more humor in it. Not sure if I'm going to bring Kenshin back to life or not yet…but don't expect anything soon anyway. He'll be a ghost for a while.

JaneDrew: Thank you for reviewing again! I'm glad you still like the story and that you enjoyed the paintings! Don't know about bringing the Kenshin-gumi in yet, but it's an idea I'm not discarding at this point. Although with Hiko's involvement, things might not exactly be the same…

Kkwy: Glad you like it! Thank you so much for reviewing!

Rubber Shuriken: Eeep! So sorry! Hope this chapter will suffice for now…

Freda Potter: I'm happy you liked the paintings! And I'm glad that I managed to do a good job with Tomoe…she's tricky to write.


	10. Consolation

Disclaimer: I do not, or ever hope to own Rurouni Kenshin.

Finally, the time has come! Sorry it took so long to write. Thanks again to omasuoniwabanshi for her research. However, I found out that I screwed up somewhat in the previous chapters on what you're supposed to do with the corpse, and I really couldn't find much info at all on the actual cremation, so I had to improvise a bit. Therefore, the funeral at the end of the chapter is probably not really accurate. I did my best though. It does get **_slightly_** graphic, so I hope I don't disturb anyone...

A huge "Thank-you!" for everyone who also enjoyed my little one-shot side-story! I really appreciated your wonderful reviews. If you reviewed both stories and had any questions or anything from "Frigid Waters," I'll add it to the reviewer responses at the end.

Since QuickEdit is being a pain, I'm going to be using the "xxxx" marks as my line breaks from now on (unless they get rid of that option eventually as well...)

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 10: Consolation 

Katsura sighed. "So what have you been doing while you had to wait for me?"

Hiko shook his head slightly, his expression pensive. "Nothing really...just reminiscing."

The commander nodded in thoughtful understanding, his eyes losing their focus for a moment. "Aa...I've been doing a lot of that myself..." he murmured. He shook his head sharply, and turned his attention back to the swordsman.

"So..." he drawled, raising an eyebrow. "Have you looked at any more of those portraits?"

"Just two..." Hiko suddenly blinked. "That reminds me..." He stood up and left the room, coming back a few minutes later with one of the scrolls in his hand. He handed the painting over to the Choshu leader. "Have you seen this one before?"

Katsura unrolled it, and then amusedly shook his head at the picture of the two swordsmen playing janken. "No...I don't believe I've ever seen this one." He smiled, almost sadly. "How I wish, all our conflicts could be settled in such a manner..."

"I was wondering...who's that other boy?"

Katsura stared at him for a moment, and then chuckled. "Boy? That's definitely no boy. That's 25 year old Okita Souji, captain of the first Shinsengumi unit, and one of the only men that was able to fight Himura to a draw!"

"Really?" Hiko was startled. "He's that good?"

"Oh, most definitely!" the other man confirmed. "He's probably one of the most skilled swordsmen in Japan." He hesitated briefly. "Although, he hasn't been seen too much lately; there are rumors that he's become ill in the lungs...coughing up blood and such."

The swords-master grimaced. "What a shame...tuberculosis, you think?

"Probably," Katsura sighed, starting to roll up the painting. "It has been going around. My friend Takasugi..." He was interrupted by a polite tap on the shoji frame.

He turned to face the door. "Enter."

The wounded guard that Hiko had seen from the window, entered the room and knelt respectfully in front of Katsura.

"Yuasa-san," Katsura spoke quietly. "How is your shoulder?"

Yuasa smiled reassuringly at his superior. "Just fine sir! It wasn't really too serious, and the doctor said I could be back to my normal duties in about a week!"

"I'm glad," Katsura said with some relief. "It's a good thing that ninja tripped when he did, or you wouldn't be sitting here right now!"

The guard nodded fervently. "I was extremely fortunate..." He hesitated, looking puzzled. "He was awfully clumsy for such a skilled ninja, though...what with falling off the roof, and then stumbling over his own feet..."

Hiko was watching the young guard, when he noticed him glance over at the scroll that Katsura was still holding, and suddenly freeze, his eyes widening slightly. The painting was only slightly unrolled, so that very little of the scene actually showed, but Hiko was positive that he sensed an impression of recognition from the other man.

Katsura was concerned by the reaction. "What's wrong, Yuasa-san? Are you sure you're all right?"

"Ah...I..I'm...fine Katsura-san," the young guard stammered, his face somewhat pale. He forced the smile back on his face. "It was just a slight twinge! Uh...I think I should go down and help the others with the preparations!" Yuasa stood hastily, and with a polite bow, he rushed out the door.

The Ishin Shishi commander stared after the guard. "That was odd," he muttered uncertainly. "I hope he's okay..."

_That man... _

"He's one of your guards, right?" Hiko murmured, his eyes narrowing contemplatively.

"Yuasa Hiroshi." Katsura nodded. "He's been with me for almost six years now."

Hiko raised an eyebrow.

_Really? Now that's very interesting..._

"So he was here when you first recruited Kenshin?"

"Aa. Tsuji was here as well...two of the very few who are left from that time. Why?"

The swords-master shrugged casually. "Just curious. What did they think of him?"

Katsura smiled slightly. "Actually, the two of them were Himura's staunchest supporters. They were there from the beginning, so they knew what he was like before he started killing. They always tried to make him feel welcome in their group: inviting him to go drinking and gambling with them, including him in their conversations...that sort of thing."

Hiko gazed at the door, a speculative gleam in his eye. "I believe I would like to have a talk with that man..."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Feeling almost light-hearted, Kenshin entered the inn's courtyard and then hesitated as he caught sight of the odd activity going on. Two soldiers with shovels were digging what appeared to be a rather large hole in the ground, and several other men were dragging in bundles of firewood...

_What the...? Are they building a bonfire? How strange..._

Walking past the digging soldiers, he overheard a few words from their conversation and froze in shock as he realized what they were doing. It wasn't a bonfire...they were building a funeral pyre...**_his _**funeral pyre! The ghost's optimistic mood suddenly came crashing down as he stared numbly at the hardworking men.

_Oh gods...this is definitely disturbing. I should try to find Shishou... I wonder if he's still in my room?_

Kenshin hurried past them, slipping through the inn's wall into an empty hallway, and headed for the stairs. He started up, only to stop again as he caught sight of his master coming down. The swords-master had an alarmingly devilish smirk on his face. Kenshin sweat-dropped.

_What's Shishou smiling about? He has that same look on his face he used to get when he was getting ready to torture me... _

Curious now, the red-head decided to tag along to find out what his master was up to.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hiko had taken his leave from Katsura, and was now wandering downstairs, searching for the injured guard. He turned a corner, and saw Okami heading in his direction. He passed her with a polite nod, and then paused.

_Maybe she knows where he went..._

"Wait, Okami-san!" he called, turning back to face her.

She looked up at him inquiringly. "Hiko-san, was there something you needed?"

"I was just wondering...have you seen Yuasa recently?"

"Hai. He was just down here a few minutes ago, looking for Tsuji-san." She shook her head slightly, looking concerned. "He seemed most urgent..."

Hiko smirked knowingly. "Did he, now?"

"They should both be outside, if you want to talk to them."

"I do indeed...arigatou, Okami-san!" he said, heading quickly for the exit.

He found them on the engawa. Yuasa was speaking excitedly, while Tsuji was making calming gestures with his hands. Catching sight of the master swordsman advancing on their position, they lapsed into silence, both looking distinctly uneasy.

"Oh good," Hiko grinned wickedly. "I was hoping to meet up with you two..."

_Heh...now for a little game of cat-and-mouse..._

Drawing his sword, he leaned nonchalantly against a post and began inspecting the blade, much to the guards' discomfort.

"You know," the large man began conversationally. "Katsura was just telling me an interesting story last night about some fanatical admirer my deshi apparently had. I understand you two have been around him for a while, so...you wouldn't happen to know anything about it, would you?" he asked meaningfully, raising an eyebrow at the embarrassed looking pair.

"Anou..."

In a casual move, Hiko flipped the blade over to examine the sharp edge, observing the men shrewdly out of the corner of his eye. "Any idea at all...?"

The two bodyguards exchanged a nervous glance. Tsuji cleared his throat, and rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. "Well...uh...I guess we might know something about it..."

"I'm glad to hear you say that..." Deciding to abandon the game, Hiko turned his attention to Yuasa. "All right," he stated, his face expressionless. "I know you recognized that scroll. Which one of you was responsible?"

The young man stared apprehensively at the swordsman. "I painted it." he admitted finally.

"I see..." Hiko unexpectedly smiled. "Well, I must admit, you're very talented!"

The two guards abruptly face-faulted, while Hiko watched on in smug amusement.

"Uh...arigatou?" Yuasa said uncertainly.

The sword-master nodded decisively, sheathing his sword. "Yes indeed, your paintings are very beautifully done." He leaned a bit closer to the guard, an evil glint in his eye. "However, I would like to talk about those rather 'erotic' portraits..."

Yuasa blanched. "Himura actually kept them?" he yelped in shock. His eyes suddenly widened in panic. "Oh gods...Hiko-san...it's not what you're thinking, I swear!"

"Is that so?" Hiko gave him a feral grin. "Care to enlighten me...?"

"I wasn't trying to seduce him or anything like that, Hiko-san, really!" he insisted adamantly. "The presents, the paintings...it was all in fun! We were just trying to cheer him up!"

Hiko was slightly taken aback.

_Cheer him up? Certainly not what I was expecting..._

His eyes narrowed slightly, perplexed. "You were trying to cheer Kenshin up?"

Both guards nodded feverishly. "That's right," Tsuji agreed. "We liked the little guy...he was such a sweet kid at first. But after a while..." He shrugged unhappily. "Well, I'm sure Katsura-san told you about what he was like afterwards."

Hiko nodded. "He did...but, there must have been something specific that set you two off," he said musingly. "You said you were trying to cheer him up, but why did you wait until after he was sixteen?"

The two men exchanged another glance. They both looked depressed.

"Ever since he came back from wherever Katsura-san had sent him, he seemed worse than he ever was...It was like all the life had gone out of his eyes." Tsuji murmured quietly. "We were never told about what happened to make him like that, but it must have been pretty bad."

"Aa," Yuasa sighed. "And trying to cheer up Himura wasn't exactly an easy thing to do. He always kept pushing us away...but when his sixteenth birthday came around, we managed to drag him off to one of the sake bars to celebrate. He wasn't happy about it – he said he hated his birthday – but for some reason, he decided to humor us anyway." He fell silent, a troubled look on his face.

"Himura was normally pretty good at holding his sake," Tsuji continued where his friend left off. "But that night he ended up drinking considerably more than usual, and he finally just broke down. Started sobbing about how he was nothing but a filthy murderer, and then proceeded to tell us **_why_** he hated his birthday…he said that he didn't want to celebrate the day of his birth, because he didn't even deserve to have been born in the first place."

"After hearing Himura's confession, we were afraid he'd do something exactly like this," Yuasa whispered regretfully. "So, Tsuji and I came up with this plan…something of a whim, you know. We wanted to see if we could get him to feel something…amusement, anger, embarrassment...anything other than that horrible self-hatred…" He stared down at the ground, dejectedly. "I guess it didn't really work, did it."

Hiko shook his head, feeling sick. "You tried," he muttered bitterly. "That's much more than what most people did, apparently."

Yuasa brushed the reassurance aside. "We should have done more!" he snarled, his face twisting in sorrow. "We gave up after a while; nothing we did seemed to work…but if we had just kept trying…maybe…" The guard broke off, trying to compose himself.

"It's not your fault," the swords-master said sharply. "You did what you could, and I'm certain he appreciated it on some level."

The painter looked up at him doubtfully. "What do you mean?"

Hiko shrugged. "Well, he did keep the paintings after all, didn't he?"

The two guards gave each other a startled look, and then Yuasa smiled thoughtfully. "Aa...I guess he did. Arigatou, Hiko-san."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kenshin listened to the exchange with some measure of anger and embarrassment.

_Nani! Those two!_ _I spent a whole year needlessly worrying that there was someone in the company that was trying to get me into bed with him! Why...why didn't I see it before?_

Calming down, the ghost smiled faintly. He had to admit that he did feel somewhat touched by their concerned efforts. It was also something of a relief to finally know who it was that had made his sixteenth year so interesting! They had in fact, done a better job at reaching him than they realized; the overtures had actually succeeded in distracting him from his miserable state of mind. It wasn't their fault that he had eventually made such a rash decision...

Kenshin sighed. Well, now he was being punished for that rash decision... he had to just try to make the best of his rather unusual situation.

_Now, if I can just get Shishou to help me out..._

He gazed uncertainly at his master. First, he would have to actually talk to the man...and he had absolutely no idea how the unpredictable swordsman would react to being confronted face-to-face with a walking, talking dead man...

_I definitely can't risk talking to him here. If he handles it badly, everyone might think he's gone crazy...and with his sense of pride, he would never forgive me for wounding his dignity... Back at the cabin maybe? We'll be alone, and no one will see if he decides to throw a Do Ryu Sen at me..._

The red-haired spirit suddenly noticed that Hiko was walking away, back towards the entrance. He started to hurry after him, but paused as he started to pass the two guards. A mischievous feeling swept over him and he grinned slyly.

_I think I owe them a little reimbursement for all the worry they put me through..._

Waiting until they were both facing away from each other, Kenshin stepped up between them and slapped them both over the head.

"Oi, Kisama! What the hell did you hit me for!"

"What are you talking about, Tsuji? **_You're_** the one who hit _**me**!_

"I did not!"

Kenshin disappeared into the inn, snickering lightly as the friends' dispute escalated into a wrestling match.

"Itai! Watch out for the shoulder, you bastard!"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hiko paused as he overheard the shouted argument from outside.

_What the hell are they fighting over...? _

"Hiko-san!" His speculation was interrupted by Katsura's sudden appearance in the hall. "Did you ever find Yuasa-san?"

"Hai..." The swords-master raised an eyebrow and nodded his head in the direction of the door. "I found him with Tsuji...but they seem to be having a fight now..."

Katsura sweat-dropped. "Those two... Always arguing about something." He heaved an exasperated sigh. "They've known each other for years, even before they joined up. I believe they both tried for the assistant-master position in their old dojo, so competition can get rather fierce between the two of them."

Hiko smirked. "Which one got the position?"

"Neither," the commander chuckled. "Someone else beat both of them out. They were not pleased..." He shook his head slightly, and then regarded the larger man with a more serious expression. "Anyway...I just wanted to let you know that I'll be rather busy for the next few hours, but I'll come get you when the services are ready to begin. Will you be able to occupy yourself until then?"

There was a sudden sharp pain in the swordsman's chest, as he was reminded of the approaching funeral. His encounter with the two body-guards had been a welcome distraction; he had almost forgotten about it...

"Aa..." he said quietly. "I'll manage by myself for a while."

Katsura started to walk away, and then turned back for a moment. "If you like, you're welcome to use my room if you want to get some rest."

Startled by the unexpected offer, Hiko stared after the receding man. He shook his head and smiled faintly.

_Arigatou, Katsura-san... I think I just might do that. But first..._

He turned and headed for the kitchen.

_...maybe I can find some sake around here somewhere_

After a bit of work, Hiko had managed to coax a jug out of one of the serving girls. She had not really approved of drinking alcohol before even eating lunch, so she had fixed him a simple tray to take up with him along with the sake.

He finished the meal quickly, and then brought the tray back to the kitchen, before at last settling down to enjoy his drink. Deciding to dispense with the saucer, he took a swig straight from the jug, and in less than an hour, the swords-master had finished it all.

Hiko leaned back against the wall and let his eyes drift shut, feeling much more relaxed than he had been. His earlier exhaustion returned, and he found himself nodding off...

Hiko promptly awoke several hours later, as he recognized the Choshu leader's ki approaching down the hallway. Rising to his feet, he slid open the door and went out to meet the other man.

"Hiko-san, it's time..." Katsura murmured solemnly. "Would you like to say good-bye, before we go down?"

The swordsman merely nodded, not quite trusting himself to speak; his chest felt uncomfortably tight. A few minutes later he found himself back in his deshi's room.

"We will begin as soon as you are finished here." Katsura said quietly. "I will wait for you downstairs." He turned and left the room, sliding the shoji closed behind him.

Alone once again with Kenshin's body, Hiko suddenly become conscious that this would be the last time he would ever see his student's face. Kneeling down next to the futon, he stared down at the pale visage, trying to memorize every detail...the subtle arch of his eyebrows, the refined slope of his nose, the gentle curve of his mouth, the vicious scar marring the softness of his cheek, the way the glistening red hair elegantly framed the overall portrait that was Himura Kenshin... Hiko suddenly choked and turned his head away, his hand coming up to cover his mouth.

_Oh gods...I can't..._

He struggled with his emotions for a moment, his eyes tightly closed. Taking a deep breath, the swordsman managed to regain control of himself and opened his eyes. Hiko reached out his hand and brushed his fingers gently through his deshi's hair.

"Sayonara, Kenshin..." he whispered softly. "I hope your next life turns out better than this one did."

Rising to his feet, the swords-master paused only long enough to grab the wrapped urn he had left next to the futon, before swiftly leaving the room.

He met Katsura waiting at the foot of the staircase, and together, they made their way outside. It was only late afternoon, but the winter sun was already beginning to set, casting an orange glow through the converted yard and bathing everything in soft golden light. A shallow pit had been dug and filled with wood, in the center of the courtyard, while the surrounding area was tastefully decorated with white paper lanterns to ward off the encroaching darkness. A small table draped in white cloth, had been set up near the pyre as a makeshift altar, behind which stood a kind looking man dressed in priest's robes.

They spoke briefly to the priest before joining the rest of the gathered mourners, the urn that Hiko had carried with him now resting on the altar to await its occupant. A few minutes later, everyone turned to face the inn's entrance, as two litter-bearers came out bearing the body of Himura Kenshin, now carefully wrapped in a shroud.

The two young men placed the litter on the pyre, stepping back respectfully as the priest approached, chanting sutras. Fragrant smoke wafted out from the incense burner he carried in his hand. The next half-hour passed in a blurred haze, as Hiko tuned it all out...his awareness focused only on the covered figure laid out over the pit, and the bittersweet memories of a life now gone forever...

Finally, the time had come to light the funeral pyre.

His face set determinedly in an expressionless mask, Hiko silently watched as a soldier stepped forward with a torch to set fire to the dry kindling beneath the shrouded remains. For a moment nothing happened, then the wood began to smoke before suddenly flaring up with a rush of intense heat. The swords-master flinched, his heart crying out in anguish, as the flames engulfed his deshi's body.

_Kenshin..._

The shroud quickly burned away, revealing the body for a brief moment, before the skin began to blacken and wither... The flames then rose higher, mercifully concealing the gruesome sight. Hiko felt a sudden rush of vertigo, as his grief combined with the sickening smell of burning hair and flesh. Closing his eyes against the dizziness, he forced himself to breathe deeply through his mouth, desperately fighting to keep his composure. Losing control in front of Katsura was bad enough; there was no way in hell, he was going to break down in front of all these other people.

His eyes still closed, he unexpectedly felt a comforting hand rest briefly on his arm. The gentle touch had a soothing effect on the tormented man, and he was finally able to pull himself together.

Breathing out a soft sigh, Hiko opened his eyes and stood calmly, his mask now firmly back in place. He watched as the flames danced and soared, sending up sparks into the night sky.

_Sayonara, Kenshin..._

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

In case you're wondering, Kenshin was the one that touched Hiko's arm, and Hiko's not freaked out by it, because he thinks it was just Katsura offering his reassurances. I'll make that a bit clearer in the next chapter. The pyre scene started out a bit more descriptive...but after re-reading it, I cut it down to avoid grossing everybody out. :P So...did I manage to surprise anybody with Tsuji and Yuasa? Heh...that part was fun to write. And now we get to see Kenshin beginning to rediscover that "mischievous streak" that Hiko had missed so much in the first chapter... Hope you enjoyed it!

Whew! Lot of reviewer responses! I did a word count and all together ended up almost as long as my first chapter!

Sailor-Earth13: I'm glad you didn't mind the funeral delay! Stupid thing was causing me all sorts of trouble...(grrr)

Ayumi Ikari: So you liked the scene with Tomoe? I'm so glad! Yeah, it is nice when Kenshin gets to laugh; he didn't really have much reason to before... As you can see, the funeral is **_finally_** here!

RidicullyL: Glad you're still enjoying this! Thank you! And I'm not really a pro in first-aid...I just remembered what I was taught in basic training and in high school. Congratulations on getting your certificate!

crimsonsun-rk: Ha! The artist is finally revealed! And Hiko and Kenshin's reunion should be in the next chapter. As for your question for "Frigid Waters", Kenshin was 14 when he joined up with the Ishin Shishi... so he trained with Hiko for somewhere around 5 years.

JaneDrew: I am really glad you like this story...especially knowing what an excellent writer you are. Thank you so much! And I don't really see how proper grenade throwing could ever come in handy, unless I get faced with a homicidal demon or something ;)

Terry-McElrath: Thank you! I'm sorry this chapter took a bit longer to get out than my other ones. Still quick in comparison to some people who take months or even years to update...but for me, a quick update is within a week. And again, thank you so much for giving me your opinion on this chapter! I'm glad you liked it!

Night-Owl123: Their reunion should be in the next chapter, so don't worry! Saitou will probably make an appearance at some point; I'm still working on that...

skenshingumi: I'm really happy that you're enjoying my fic! I know what you mean about happy endings... That's why I had Kenshin come back as a ghost to try and make up for the mistakes he made. I just couldn't leave him dead; I like him too much! You're right though, what happened in this story does make the one-shot a bit tragic...

xZig-zagx: Thank you! I'm so glad they're letting you re-post your story again!

omasuoniwabanshi: Yeah, your info helped out a lot actually! I'm glad you enjoyed my side-story view into what Hiko was thinking. I'll see if I can maybe add more to it, as a collection of one-shot memories...if I can think of any more :)

a.k.a. Arashi: Thank you! Yeah, my action sequence was rather short. But it didn't really need a whole lot of length to it to get my point across. And thank you once again for your tips on my other story!

SiriusFan13: I wouldn't worry too much about having Kenshin come back; even if I do (which I'm not sure how exactly), it would be quite a ways in the future. I'm still thinking of ways the Kenshin-gumi could be incorporated into the story, but again, I'm not really sure yet how... Your suggestions are pretty interesting though. I like to finish stories in my head too...they usually end up **_very_** different than the real outcome though... I'll try to add more little one-shots if I can think of any; and I'll say it again: I love your stories! They are not crap!

Peacebunnie: I'm glad you liked it! Katsura and the guards didn't miss the ninja's clumsiness, they just had too much on their minds at the time to say anything. Heh...I hope you managed to get some sleep after the disturbing image of 'Hiko the potter!'

A lilmatchgirl: I think they fixed the number problem with the names, but I guess it's a little too late now... Heh...I briefly considered writing out that pottery scene as a humorous omake, but luckily I decided not to...

Rubber Shuriken: I guess I'm just going to have to die then...but...but then I'll never finish the story! He'll stay dead for a while, but I might bring him back at some point.

Kkwy: Thank you! Yeah, Kenshin is awesome, isn't he?

moeru himura: Thanks for saying you'll review every chapter! I don't expect people to do that, but it is very nice to get so many reviews... Well, I'm not going to have Kenshin reunited with his body, so rigor mortis won't be a real problem :) I might bring him back some other way, but that won't be for a long time yet.

Shaolin 10: I'm glad you liked the first chapter! Did you ever finish the others? I have to admit this story was partially inspired by your depiction of Hiko... I really loved the way you portrayed him.

kenni's fanatic: Glad you like it!

Blaze Coyotlhart: I got a real kick out of your review... you really had me laughing over the "would've gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for that meddling Kenshin ghost!" remark! That poor clumsy ninja! Thank you for the sympathy over my father...I really appreciated it.

Streetwise Girl: Sorry for making you cry! I add the humor in so people won't get too depressed.

Marlingrl: Thank you for reviewing both my stories! Hmm...maybe I should buy stock in Kleenex... ;)

Freda Potter: (smiles sheepishly) the suspense isn't really intentional...it just ends up that way... That would have been pretty amusing if the ninja had ended up being the artist!

Lucrecia LeVrai: Oh! I'm glad you're still enjoying the story, and that you don't mind the ghost issue. I really cracked up over your speculation on the artist...Shishio? That would have been a real hoot! Yes, I do collect fan arts, and doujinshi scans too. I've seen some really drool-worthy ones... Anyway, I don't really have plans to continue this fic **_forever_**, but I guess it does give me the option, if I change my mind. I'm working on keeping my fan-girl Japanese to a minimum...as you see, not a whole lot in this chapter. Thank you so much for your reviews! I'm glad you appreciated my efforts in the research department...I really wanted to try to make things at least somewhat authentic...

BakaBokken: Thank you so much for reviewing! I'm really happy you liked my story! You know, when I first started thinking about the painter, I had actually intended him to have been killed in some battle...and that would be why he stopped after a year. I prefer how it ended up though.

Mip the Demon Fox: Yeah, I wish they had gotten more screen time too. Hiko especially. I'm not counting his appearance in the Shimabara arc after Kyoto. That was just awful...although slightly amusing at some points. Thank you for reviewing! I'm really glad you like this so far! Definitely not the usual death fic...

Nekotsuki: I'm glad you liked the one-shot! Yeah, I was enlisted four years in the Army. I got out in 2001 and spent the last four years scared to death they were going to try and recall me to go to Iraq... Thankfully, it never happened. I guess they didn't need my particular job.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Glossary of terms:

sweat-drop – a tear shaped drop on or around a characters head denoting surprise, shock, stress, worry, or exasperation

Anou – "Well", "um", "er..."

Do Ryu Sen – "Earth Dragon Flash"a Hiten Mitsurugi attack

Itai - an exclamation of pain


	11. Promises

Disclaimer: Nope...still don't own it.

I'm so, so sorry for taking so long to update! I actually had the majority already written out more than 2 weeks ago, but I had a nasty attack of writer's block about ¾'s of the way through, and just couldn't figure out what to do with the rest of it. And then I went and got a new job, and that's eating into my writing time as well... I really, **_really_** needed a job though, so it was unfortunately, a necessary set back. My updates from now on might be a bit sporadic, so please don't be upset...

This chapter is probably going to be quite different from what you were expecting. More of a character development chapter, I guess. I hope nobody minds... I ended up cutting out a major part of the end to include in the next chapter to go with the reunion, because it was getting too long. Also, no humor! Hiko gets angry, and not for the reason you're all probably thinking either. Hope you like it!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 11: Promises 

For most of the service, Kenshin had managed to remain calm in spite of his discomfort at being a spectator at his own funeral. But when the torch-bearer had stepped forward to light the pyre, the ghost had turned away, feeling sick. The thought of watching his body go up in flames was just too upsetting to even contemplate... Instead, he focused his gaze on his master's stricken expression.

_Shishou... _

Suddenly, Hiko clenched his eyes shut, swaying slightly as he desperately sought to control his breathing. The swords-master's face had gone pale, and beads of sweat formed on his brow.

_Shishou?_

Worriedly, the ghost moved closer to his master. After a moment of uncertainty, he reached out and gently touched the man's arm. Kenshin wished that he could say something comforting, but he just couldn't risk it... Not yet...not here.

_I'm so sorry for putting you through this, but it'll be okay... Please just hold on for a little longer... _

The swordsman's face relaxed. Kenshin pulled back, as Hiko gave a faint sigh and opened his eyes, outwardly composed once more. The spirit smiled sadly at the older man.

_...I'll make it up to you, I promise _

These last two days had been full of so many revelations, from the moment he first woke up as a ghost, to his observing his own funeral. But of them all, the biggest shock had come from finding out his master's true feelings for him... The vision of Hiko crying over his corpse was a scene the red-head didn't think he would ever forget.

For almost ten years, Kenshin had been certain that he was nothing but an annoyance to the older man. Hiko had rarely showed any emotion for him as a child except for irritation or amusement...seldom giving him a kind word, or even praise for a job well done. He had been constantly berated, treated frequently like some half-wit... Kenshin figured that maybe his master had initially taken him in out of pity...but he could never figure out why the man hadn't just dumped him off on one of the willing townsfolk. A nice couple had offered to adopt him during his first year, being unable to have children of their own. Hiko had refused. Kenshin had never understood why...until now.

This was a side of his master he had never been allowed to see before. The compassionate, caring man hidden underneath layers of pride, arrogance, sarcasm, and indifference. Like Kenshin himself had done so often as Battousai, Hiko hid his true nature behind an unfeeling mask.

_But why? _

Why had a man who obviously cared so much, pretend he never cared at all? What experiences had shaped Hiko Seijuro the thirteenth into the man he had become? Tomoe had mentioned that at some point in his past, Hiko had lost his purpose, his motivation... Had he been damaged in some way? Emotionally scarred? Or was the indomitable swords-master simply afraid of being seen as weak?

The ghost sighed heavily. He realized he had absolutely no idea of the man's life before he had ended up living with him. Perhaps, if all went well, he could convince his master to enlighten him someday...

He turned his attention back to the ceremony, now reaching its conclusion. The flames had finally died down, and the priest was now picking through the ashes with a set of chopsticks, meticulously placing the bone fragments into the funeral urn.

That urn... Kenshin had almost started crying when he saw Hiko unwrap it and hand it to the priest. Even after all these years, his master had remembered its significance... The spirit smiled wistfully; he had truly loved that piece. At the time, he had thought that it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Never had he imagined that it would be put to use in such a manner. It was however... rather appropriate. He found himself deeply touched by the thoughtful gesture.

The red-head gazed fondly at his master.

_You had me fooled for so long, Shishou... thinking you were such a heartless bastard. But now I know better. I won't allow you to fool me again! _

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It was over. The fire had burned out; the body was gone... irrevocably consumed by the raging flames. There was nothing left now but ash and bone, and even those were quickly disappearing, as they were painstakingly gathered and consigned to the urn. After the priest finally finished collecting the remains, the urn was sealed and wrapped in a white cloth.

_Gone... he's gone... I can't believe I'll never see him again..._

Hiko watched dully as the man approached him, respectfully offering his condolences along with the covered vessel, and a wooden mortuary tablet inscribed with Kenshin's posthumous name. The swords-master reluctantly accepted them with a polite nod, his face carefully kept blank of all expression.

The gathered mourners gradually began to drift away, returning to their normal duties. None of them bothered to approach Hiko with their sympathy after a nervous glance at the cold look on his face. This suited him just fine, as he wasn't exactly in the mood to be sociable at the moment. In fact, all he really felt like doing now was getting out of this wretched city and going home.

_Home? No... It's not even really a home anymore, just some place I happen to live..._

Sighing, he turned and headed back toward the inn to pack. He hesitated as he saw Katsura was still standing in his previous position, staring blankly at the burned out pit.

"Katsura, are you all right?" he asked quietly, remembering that he wasn't the only one that had been affected by this ordeal.

The Ishin Shishi leader shook his head and smiled wearily. "I'll be fine Hiko-san," he replied, still staring at the pyre. Finally turning his attention to the swordsman, Katsura gave him a questioning look. "So, what are your plans now? Will you be leaving right away?"

Hiko nodded. "Aa. Just as soon as I finish packing."

Katsura sighed regretfully. "Are you sure I can't convince you to stay one more night? It might be better to travel in the morning..."

"No. I think it's best if I leave now."

"I understand." The commander smiled again. "It's been an honor meeting you, Hiko-san; perhaps you can come back sometime just to visit?"

Startled, Hiko blinked and then shrugged slightly. "Maybe someday."

"I'd like that very much..." Katsura frowned slightly as he took notice of a man standing at the gate. "Please excuse me for a moment, Hiko-san." Still frowning, he hurriedly approached the new arrival as Hiko resumed his walk back to the inn's entrance.

The swords-master climbed the stairs back up to the now unoccupied room, and placed the wrapped urn and the tablet on the floor next to the box of paintings. Pulling out a large folded cloth, he spread it out on the floor and positioned the box in the center. The tablet was set on top of that, then the urn. He gathered the ends of the cloth, deftly tying them together with a thin rope, and very gently slung his bundle over one shoulder. Hiko cast one last sorrowful glance around his deshi's empty room, and then tightly closed his eyes.

It was time to depart.

Stepping outside, Hiko saw that Katsura and the stranger had taken their conversation onto the engawa. The two seemed to be arguing about something. Not wishing to intrude, he started to head for the gate, but then paused as part of the conversation drew his attention.

"... know you were fond of the boy, but he was just a hitokiri. As far as I'm concerned, he merely spared us the trouble by doing it himself."

**_What...!_**

His pack slipped from suddenly numb fingers to lie forgotten on the ground. Taking a step closer to the arguing pair, he felt a spark of fury as Katsura began to sputter angrily at the other man.

"I've told you all before! There was no way in Hell I was going to allow you…"

"What exactly did you mean by that?" Hiko suddenly interrupted, his voice so cold that it actually made the commander shiver. Katsura turned to face the swords-master, a feeling of dread taking hold of him.

Hiko's attention was fixed on the newcomer, his eyes gleaming dangerously.

"H…Hiko-san…" Katsura started nervously, but then froze at the deadly glare aimed in his direction.

The swordsman turned his attention back to the other man, rage building up inside him. "Tell me…what did you mean by '**_he spared us the trouble_**?'"

The stranger swallowed hard as he stared up at the enraged man. "Who the hell are you?" he demanded shakily, ignoring the anxious voice in the back of his mind telling him to shut up. "Our discussion is none of your concern!"

Hiko took a step forward, forcing the now alarmed man back a step. "If you're talking about what I think you are...then it damn well is my concern!" he snarled, his hand on the hilt of his sword. "For the last time... what did you mean by..."

"Hiko-san!" Katsura broke in desperately. "Please calm down!"

"Calm down?" the swords-master said in disbelief, his eyes flashing in anger. "You heard what he said about Kenshin, and you want me to calm down!"

The Ishin Shishi leader paled under the man's furious gaze, but managed to stand his ground. "Please allow me to explain..."

Hiko glared at him, but settled down somewhat. "Very well..." he growled, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "Explain."

Katsura hesitated, wondering how to phrase his words. "In the past," he began cautiously, "we have had a few hitokiri that became so warped, that it became necessary to have them...dealt with."

"'Dealt with!'" the large man scoffed angrily. "Such a polite phrase...'executed' is more like it. You had them put down like some kind of mad dog..."

"It may sound cruel, but in a sense, that is exactly what they were. Men who had lost themselves in madness and blood... they could only find true pleasure in taking other's lives." Katsura shook his head sadly. "Men such as those, cannot be allowed to exist in this world..."

"But Kenshin wasn't anything like that," Hiko stated grimly. "You said so yourself. Why would he need to be killed?"

Katsura threw a distasteful glance at his frightened associate. "Unfortunately, there has been a growing concern among the other patriot officials, that Himura would eventually become something of a threat...that he would either end up mad like the others, or perhaps turn traitor and reveal some of our more underhanded dealings. They offered him a government position as a way to try and keep him under their control; but when he refused and asked to be released from service, they began toying with the idea of having him eliminated..."

"You damned politicians..."

The commander glared back at the swordsman and shook his head sharply. "I wasn't one of them! I refused to even consider it. I told them he was off limits, and that he would be free to live out the rest of his life as he saw fit."

Hiko turned his attention back to the other politician. "And yet, **_you_** still have the gall to come to my deshi's funeral and talk about how he did you all a favor by killing himself?" he spat in disgust. "You bloody bastard!"

"Y..your deshi...?" the man whispered faintly, feeling suddenly ill. "Oh dear gods..."

"Just a hitokiri, eh?" Hiko hissed bitterly. "What right do you have to say that? You didn't even know him! He was just an idealistic child who wanted only to protect people...it was you bastards who turned him into a hitokiri; you have no right to judge him!" He glared threateningly at the man. "Kenshin had a dream of a new era, where people were no longer forced to suffer under the Shogunate, and he believed in that dream with his whole heart and soul. He gave everything he had to your cause. He allowed himself to be used…to have his heart ripped to shreds and his soul shattered, trusting that if he sacrificed himself, you would make that dream a reality."

Ignoring Katsura's alarmed protest; Hiko suddenly grabbed the official by the front of his gi and hauled him up so that his snarling face was only inches from the other man's.

"Consider this," he growled, his eyes blazing in fury. "As terrifying as you all may have thought 'Battousai' had been, he was only an apprentice who never actually finished his training. **_I _**was his master. Compared to me, he was merely an amateur." He flung the scared man away and glared down at him. "I can be far more terrifying than Battousai ever was. And I swear, if I **_ever_** find out that you people betrayed the trust he had in you, if you lose yourselves to greed, that if this new government turns out as corrupt as the last, I will tear you all apart myself!"

Hiko whipped around, his white mantle billowing out behind him, and began to stalk toward the gate. He paused to grab his discarded bundle and threw a menacing glare over his shoulder, breaking the shocked silence to address the man once more:

"You might want to pass that along to the rest of your colleagues, because I **_will _**be watching you…"

The swordsman swept away, leaving the frightened Ishin Shishi politician behind to quake in terror, the merciless threat echoing in his mind.

For a stunned moment, Katsura stared wide-eyed at the retreating swordsman, before aiming a glare at his terror-stricken associate. "Damn it...you really made a mess of things this time, you idiot!"

He swiftly turned and began to hurry after the furious Hiten Mitsurugi master. "Hiko-san! Please wait!"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Shaken, Kenshin trailed after his master after a troubled glance at his former commander. He had suspected that the Ishin Shishi might turn on him eventually; he understood that he could be perceived as a dangerous risk to them, after all. But to hear it actually said out loud was just... unsettling.

The red-haired ghost was grateful for Katsura's support on his behalf...but would it really have been enough? Would his commander have actually been able to keep the other officials from trying to kill him anyway? If Kenshin had lived, and gone off wandering like he had originally intended, would he have been constantly looking over his shoulder, wondering if there was an assassin on his trail? He most likely could handle any potential attempts on his life, but just the idea of it... The ghost shook his head disparagingly. It was certainly a sobering thought.

He watched as Katsura caught up with Hiko at the gate.

"Hiko-san... I'm sorry for..."

"I don't want to hear it," Hiko interrupted harshly. "Sayonara Katsura."

The commander drew in a startled breath, and then bowed his head sadly. "Sayonara, Hiko-san. I hope someday you will forgive us..." He turned away and left the swordsman alone with his anger.

Hiko shoved the gate open and stalked down the dark streets, the unseen ghost of his apprentice meekly following behind.

_Wonderful... Now I have to deal with Shishou while he's in a bad mood..._

Kenshin sighed.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Well, how'd you like it? Sorry again if it wasn't what you were expecting... I tried so hard to get through this chapter despite my writer's block, so I'm actually quite pleased I managed to get this out at all. In case you're wondering about the chopsticks, apparently they really do that at traditional Japanese funerals. (The family members pick up the bones and put them into the urn with two persons grasping the same bone fragment together and putting it into the urn in unison. This custom explains why when two Japanese reach for the same piece of food at the same time with chopsticks, both will quickly pull back, as this is the only time two people hold the same thing with two sets of chopsticks.) Since Kenshin really doesn't have any family, and I couldn't see Hiko actually doing it, I had the priest do it alone.

Oh! And a **huge** thanks goes out to SiriusFan13 for an absolutely beautiful fanart she drew for me! You can find it here: www(dot)fanart-central(dot)net/pic-189026(dot)html. Please check it out!

Reviewer Responses

Terry-McElrath: Thank you so much for your wonderful comments! I'm glad you liked the funeral; I put a lot of thought into it, so I'm glad it seems to have worked out. Hope you liked this one too! Thank you for all your support while I was still suffering from my writer's block!

Night-Owl123: Sorry it took so long to update! I'm glad you're still enjoying the story!

Streetwise Girl: Yeah, Hiko's great at scaring people isn't he! And he proves it once again... :) Yes, Okita really did have TB. He died May 30, 1868 in a tuberculosis hospital in Edo. I brought it up for a good reason too... ;)

xZig-zagx: Thank you! I'm glad you think so! Aww... a snuggly kitty? I love cats! I have four, and one of them likes to sit on my lap while I'm typing. Of course when she does that, I have to type one-handed, because she likes to pin my arm down...

crimsonsun-rk: You're welcome! Yeah, 14 is really too young for that line of work. I'm glad you didn't think the cremation was too gruesome; you should have seen it **_before_** I cut it though... I had been in a really morbid frame of mind I guess :)

a.k.a. Arashi: Thanks again for offering to help me out with my writer's block! I was going to send you this chapter for your opinion, but I decided to post it anyway when you didn't respond... Anyway, yeah I knew about how they have more services afterwards, but I'm just going to skip all that, because it would just make everything so much more complicated... It would be pretty amusing though. Heh... I'm planning something interesting for that janken picture! Read Streetwise Girl's response, and maybe you can figure out what I'm intending to do ;)

Peacebunnie: What an enthusiastic reaction! Yeah, good thing nobody was in the room... that would have been a bit embarrassing. I've done that myself a couple times... I'm glad you really liked the chapter!

BakaBokken: Thanks! I'm glad you liked the humor! And I'm glad you like my little one-shot too! Thanks again for letting me know about the C2 thing, and for letting me join KQEC. I wonder if they'll ever do something to fix all their little "quirks"?

moeru himura: Thank you! So you liked who the culprits turned out to be? I'm so glad! I was hoping people might get a kick out of those two being behind the whole thing.

Ayumi Ikari: I'm sorry I made you cry! There shouldn't be too many more sad parts in the rest of the story... at least I don't think so anyway. I'm glad you liked Tsuji and Yuasa's roles; they really are pretty nice guys.

Sailor-Earth13: Glad you liked it! Sorry it took so long to post this one...

Sakura Kamitsu: I'm glad you're still enjoying my fic! Thank you!

SiriusFan13: Sorry that the reunion wasn't in this chapter... Next one for certain though; I've already got part of it written out from when I cut it out of this chapter. And sorry too for that disturbing mental image of the Ghost reference... ;) Heh... maybe you could draw that one out too as a doujinshi... just kidding! Thanks again for your wonderful picture; that was just so beautiful... (bursts into tears)

Rubber Shuriken: That is a pretty disturbing visual... I definitely wouldn't want to see that animated... Uh... yeah, there is a chance he might be brought back... I don't know if it's 50 sure or not...

omasuoniwabanshi: Thank you! I'm glad you approved of the artist's identity! Yep, no hentai! And thanks again for the recipe... I'll try that out as soon as I get some free time.

Kyoryu: I'm really glad you're enjoying the story! And that you appreciated the humor before things got depressing again.

Sweat Drop: Thanks for pointing that out! I can't believe I forgot to add "exasperation" to the list; that was one of the things I was using it for... Anyway, I went back and added it to the glossary list. Thanks again!

skenshingumi: I am really glad you liked the touch of humor I used to lighten the mood for the funeral scene. And that you didn't think the funeral was too sappy or anything. I really tried hard to find a good balance to get my point across without coming off as mawkish. Things might get a bit sentimental in the next chapter at first, as Hiko has something of a flashback... just a warning if you don't like it.

Shaolin 10: I'm really glad you liked my story so far! But... what happened to all your own stories? They're all gone! T-T

Lucrecia LeVrai: No, I've never seen a doujinshi with that particular pairing... Kenshin and Shishio? Wow... that just boggles the mind... I'm so glad you really liked the chapter! I went back and changed that 'yokatta'; you were definitely right about it being unnecessary. Sorry it took me so long to get this chapter out, and for postponing the reunion... it will be in the next chapter though.

A lilmatchgirl: Glad you liked the Tsuji/Yuasa part! Yeah... poor Kenshin...

WolfDaughter: Thanks for the review! I'm glad you liked my story even though you cried through most of it... the mood should become somewhat more humorous after the reunion. Hope you found a nice comedy to cheer you up! There are a lot of really good ones out there.

princess-oro: Thanks for reviewing! Yeah, I loved that episode; Hiko was so mean...not letting his baka deshi give him a hug... :)

Swirly: Glad you still like the story! I'm not sure how long it's going to be actually... When I first started thinking about writing this story, I intended to end it sometime after the reunion, but now, I think it might go on for a while...

Freda Potter: Don't worry! I'll keep my promise:) Mischievous Kenshin... hehe!

Unseen Watcher: Oh you're back! Thanks for reviewing again! I thought maybe you decided you didn't like it anymore. I'm glad you didn't mind me using your name for my chapter title :) and sorry for making you cry... apparently I've made a lot of people cry for the duration of this fic! Heh...there was a bit of violence in this chapter, but probably not how you were expecting...

Crystal Snowflakes: I'm glad you're enjoying the story! Sorry it took me a little while to update it...


	12. Reminiscence and Reunion

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin is not owned by me. The characters, however, have been kind enough to lend me their services for the time being...

Whoa... I finally finished chapter 12! I am so sorry for taking such a long time, I really am! The majority of the delay I will blame on my crappy job, for keeping me so mind-numbingly worn out all the time. Getting off at two in the morning just sucks. I want to quit so bad, but the people I work with and for are absolutely wonderful, so I think I'd feel pretty guilty... They actually threw me a birthday party last week... (sniffles) How sweet is that? Anyway... **_hopefully_** the next chapter won't take nearly as long, seeing as how quite a bit of it was already written out because it was originally intended to be part of this chapter. I wanted to have something to post by my birthday, but I ended up being a few days late... sorry! And then when I **_was_** finally ready to post, FFnet was having server problems and I couldn't log in! For two whole freaking days! Just figures... Well, at least it's posted now :)

Warnings: Hiko. A bit of angry swearing, drinking, and a major attack of sentimentality... ;P Hope you enjoy!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 12: Reminiscence and Reunion

Stalking through the streets of Kyoto, Hiko was still fuming. After all the years of dedicated service his deshi had given the Ishin Shishi... all the pain and heartache that boy had gone through...

_Those fucking bastards! How dare they even consider such a thing...! Damned politics... Now I remember why I became a recluse in the first place..._

The few people he came across, hastily scattered before the outraged sword-master. Even a couple of hot-headed samurai who were looking for a fight, took one look at the deadly expression on his face and fled, fervidly deciding that it just wasn't worth losing their lives over.

So completely lost in his fury, Hiko didn't notice any of it.

Dismally, Kenshin trailed along in his master's wake, lamenting his eternal rotten luck. Trying to approach Hiko when he was in this kind of mood would be a really bad idea.

_Of course, self-pity isn't going to help my situation at all. I don't even have the right to feel sorry for myself! I was looking for atonement... and facing an extremely irate Hiko Seijuro would be nothing less than what I deserve really... _

The ghost sighed and then shuddered slightly. That didn't mean he was looking forward to it though... Hiko was downright scary when he was angry.

He glanced up at his master, and watched as a drunk stumbling out of one of the bars lining the street barely missed being broadsided by the seething man.

_Definitely scary... Makes me almost glad I'm not solid anymore..._

Taking the ghost by surprise, Hiko paused briefly, then swiftly turned and disappeared through the door the drunk had just come out of. He came out a couple minutes later with a large jug under his arm.

Kenshin sighed again.

_Yare yare... this is bound to be a very interesting night..._

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

By the time Hiko had reached the path at the base of the mountain, his fury had finally diminished somewhat, and melancholy had settled in once again to take its place. Trudging wearily through the forest, he suddenly hesitated for a moment and then changed direction, taking a different, but very familiar trail.

At last, he came across a clearing he had visited many times over the last five years. Illuminated by the soft moonlight, Hiko stared silently out at the makeshift graves, and recalled that fateful evening almost ten years ago when he had laid eyes on them for the first time... when a tiny slave-child's actions and words had piqued his interest, and awakened something long dormant within his soul...

Hope.

He closed his eyes, lost in memories of the past...

xxxxxxx

Hiko had, long ago, lost faith in the human race. He had become disillusioned... cynical... despairing of all the suffering and bloodshed he witnessed everyday... sick to death of a power-hungry regime who would abuse their authority to lay waste to so many people's lives.

Once upon a time, the swordsman had been an idealist. He truly believed he could make a difference. He had tried so hard... tried to protect, tried to ease the suffering... but all for naught. For every life he managed to save, hundreds more died. For every criminal he brought to justice, others merely rose up to take their place.

He could see that Japan was headed for destruction. Even a man of his incredible strength could never hope to be able to prevent the inevitable.

So what was the point of even trying anymore, when all his efforts proved to be futile? Only a week ago, he had happened upon a scene of carnage. Bandits had been attacking a small caravan, slaughtering every person with it. He had killed the assailants, but had only been able to save a single child... and even that was now uncertain. A week had passed, and no one in the nearby village had seen any sign of the boy.

Walking through the woods, Hiko sighed unhappily as he speculated on the child's fate.

_Suicide in despair? It certainly is common enough these days. Even when I wield my sword according to the teachings of Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu... too many times, I cannot save anyone. I kill and kill, and still the villains, like maggots... spring from the corpse of a Japan decomposing. There will be more and more acts like this, and all I can do is bury the victims..._

With a startled gasp, he suddenly froze as he came into sight of the clearing. Eyes wide, he stared out at a field of crude wooden crosses. And there, standing in the midst of it all with torn and bloodied hands, was the young child he had rescued, staring down at three large stones.

_That boy... he did all this?_

Hiko quietly approached the child. "You dug graves not just for your parents, but for the bandits too?" he asked wonderingly.

"They were slavers, not parents," the boy stated softly, still not looking up from the gravestones. "My parents died of cholera last year. But bandits or slavers, once they're dead, they're just bodies... so I made graves for them."

"And these three stones?"

"Kasumi-san, Akane-san, Sakura-san. They were taken from their families as payment for debts. I only knew them for a day, but I was the only boy here and we didn't have any parents. So I thought, even if it costs me my life, I'll have to protect them."

_So young... and yet such strength of spirit... Could this boy be the one? The one worthy of carrying on the teachings of Hiten Mitsurugi?_

"_Even if it costs me my life, I'll have to protect them."_

xxxxxxx

'_To protect'... _

Looking back, it seemed that those words had always seemed to be associated with that boy...

"_But so many are being killed as we speak! Doesn't Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu teach us to protect from suffering? When do we use our swords, if not now?"_

"_Kind and caring, he wanted nothing more than to protect, to help others. _ _He had such a pure spirit."_

"_He was just an idealistic child who wanted only to protect people..."_

_As Shinta or Kenshin, that was one thing that never changed... Until _**they**_ got hold of him... twisted his ideals, turning a naïve child into a tool for murder... _

Hiko gazed out at the moonlit graveyard for a moment more, then turned away to begin his trek back to the cabin, his deshi's spirit following in thoughtful silence.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Stepping through the doorway into the little hut, Hiko could feel the stifling emptiness surrounding him... smothering him... Carefully setting down the pack carrying his deshi's remains, he closed his eyes and tightened his grip on the now-empty sake jug. He had known that it would be difficult coming back here, but the hopeless desolation that suddenly overwhelmed him was almost like a living, malevolent being squeezing icy fingers around his heart. It hurt so much... almost _too_ much...

_Gone... gone... I have nothing left... Everything I had ever cared for... anyone I had ever loved... the last person left on this god-forsaken world that gave my life any meaning... just gone... _

Anguished rage flooded through his mind, blinding him with its searing heat. An unbearable pressure built up within his chest, tightening his throat and making it hard to breathe. The swordsman suddenly let out an incoherent scream, and hurled the jug at the far wall where it exploded in a hail of broken pieces.

Still breathing hard from the outburst, Hiko's fury began to recede as he stared at the shattered fragments littering the floor. He leaned back against the wall behind him, and then slid down until he was sitting on the floor. His hand trembling slightly, the master swordsman reached up to cover his eyes.

"Damn it..." he whispered huskily. "How did everything go so wrong...? How...?"

After a long moment, Hiko sighed and lowered his arm to rest on his knee. Bleakly, he stared around the room until his gaze fell on the bundle still lying on the floor next to him. He reached out, carefully untying the knotted rope holding the package closed, and removed the wrapped urn from its confines. Pulling the heavy container into his lap, the swordsman gently stroked his fingers along the soft, white cloth. This was all that remained of his baka deshi. This urn filled with ash and bone... the myriad of bittersweet memories that would live on forever in his mind... These painful reminders of his student's former life, he would continue to cherish for as long as he lived.

A faint, wistful smile touched his face briefly as he remembered the morning after he had first taken Kenshin into his care. The evening before, he had not really gotten a good look at the boy's rather unique features. The sunset had bathed everything in an orange glow, and after it had grown dark, the forest had been illuminated by only the pale light of the moon. The morning light shining through the open window however, had revealed a truly remarkable sight.

Staring down at the tiny child serenely sleeping on his futon, the swordsman was fascinated by the shimmering blood-red hair... the delicate face relaxed in slumber. And when the boy had woken, Hiko found himself captivated by striking amethyst eyes... eyes so full of sorrow and pain that they had inspired such an overwhelmingly protective feeling in the embittered young man.

After so many years of numb apathy, the intensity of the feeling had been almost frightening.

Deeply shaken, he ended up pushing his feelings aside, unwilling to allow the child to get too close. But almost five years had been spent raising and training that child. Five years spent feeling useful again, feeling like he had finally found someone worth living – and eventually dying for. Hiko found himself depending more and more on his deshi's company. Kenshin had become his sole purpose in life.

And sometime during those five years, he came to realize that it was more than just that. Without even trying, Kenshin had somehow stolen his heart. Hiko had completely and hopelessly fallen in love. Not in any romantic sense of the word, but in the warm-hearted, tender, almost possessive sensation that envelopes any parent when setting eyes on their young. This was **_his_** child...**_his_** son.

And then Kenshin had left, leaving the swords-master feeling horribly empty inside. Angry and hurt, Hiko had felt abandoned... betrayed. But after five years to reflect on all the things that had led up to the boy's leaving, he had been forced to admit that he himself, may well have been to blame for his baka deshi's reckless decision.

Contrary to how he actually felt, his affection for his student had always manifested in an extremely sarcastic, offensive, and often-times almost cruel manner. 'Baka deshi'... his idiot apprentice... The swordsman had never really thought his student was stupid. Foolish, perhaps. Charmingly clueless and naïve about certain things, definitely. But he was far from stupid. In fact, Hiko had found the boy to be unusually sharp, dedicated, and quick to learn everything that his master had thrown at him.

Hiko had truly loved that child, had been so proud of his progress; but had the man ever said anything? No. He had always kept the boy at a distance. Could never permit himself to say the words that he had felt so deeply. Now, with Kenshin dead, it was far too late to ever tell him.

He gazed down at the urn resting between his hands, and wondered...

_Could all this have been avoided? _

If he had just tried a little harder... been able to speak those words, could he have prevented Kenshin from leaving in the first place? Hiko did have his reasons for treating the boy the way he had, but if he had known that this would be the end result... maybe he should have tried to be more of a father, instead of just a teacher... Maybe just once, he could have told Kenshin that he cared...

The swords-master tilted his head back to rest on the wall behind him, staring morosely at the ceiling. He could feel his despair returning.

_Was... was this my fault?_

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kenshin regarded his master with concern. The swordsman's unpredictable mood swings were becoming somewhat alarming. After Hiko's sudden violence earlier, he seemed to have slipped into a state of depression. He was now just sitting motionlessly against the wall, his gaze unfocused, his expression brooding.

The ghost studied his master's face as the man leaned back to gaze up at the ceiling.

_He looks so sad... I wish I knew what exactly was going through his mind right now... _

As if in answer, Hiko glanced down at the urn in his lap and then turned away, raising one hand to rub his face tiredly. "Kenshin..." he whispered. "I'm sorry..."

_Sorry?_

Kenshin was confused. Why was his Shishou apologizing to him? What did Hiko have to be sorry for?

"Was it my fault you left? Did I drive you away? I know I was harsh in my teaching methods. I was insulting and sarcastic. At times I know you probably thought me to be a cold, heartless bastard... Was there anything at all I could have done to keep you from this path?" The swordsman bowed his head, his eyes clenched tightly shut. "Was your time here with me really so unpleasant, that you would choose suicide over coming back? Oh Kenshin...I'm so sorry..."

Kenshin couldn't bear to listen anymore. Hiko's heartbroken words had struck him like a physical blow. Was this what his master really thought? That he was, in some way, responsible for his apprentice's death?

_Shishou... _

The spirit felt horrible. To think, that his drunken mistake had caused this once proud and confident man to be reduced to such a state...

He had to put an end to this now.

The red-head silently knelt in front of the grief-stricken man and lightly touched his master's hand.

"Shishou, please...stop talking like that! None of this was your fault!"

The swords-master's head had jerked up at the feathery touch, and he was now staring in wide-eyed shock at the apparition in front of him. Hiko's heart skipped a beat, before slamming hard against his ribcage.

"K...Kenshin?"

"Hai, Shishou," Kenshin murmured gently. "It's me... I'm here..."

Hiko sat frozen in place, overwhelmed by a rapid-fire succession of intense emotion. Shock, relief, joy, confusion, pain, resentment, anger... The emotional overload was too much to handle. His mind blanked out... his reaction immediate, automatic, and honed from years of habit. Snatching up the sword lying next to him, Hiko let out an enraged battle cry and swung the sheathed blade at his deshi's head.

"You **_BAKA!_**"

Unable to dodge the blow, Kenshin's knee-jerk response was to clench his eyes tightly shut and brace himself for impact. Naturally, the sheath whistled harmlessly through the space that his head occupied, but old habits really do die hard... Kenshin's fear of his master's wrath had been such a deeply rooted reaction from his childhood, that he had completely forgotten that he was insubstantial now.

Opening his eyes cautiously, the ghost managed to catch a brief glimpse of the startled look on Hiko's face before it disappeared behind a disturbingly blank expression.

Without a word, Hiko rose from the floor, carefully set the urn he had still been holding on a table, and calmly walked outside.

Confused and more than a little worried, Kenshin followed.

"Shishou...?"

Pointedly ignoring the red-head, the swords-master walked over to a log in front of the hut and picked up the sake jug he'd left when Katsura had arrived. Satisfied to note that it was still mostly full, he uncorked it and knocked back almost half the contents in several large gulps. Feeling somewhat unsteady, he sat down heavily on the log.

"Shishou..."

Hiko twitched slightly at the sound of his deshi's voice, but still refused to look at him.

_Oh dear gods_... _This isn't happening... Kenshin's dead! I saw his body burning! This is just a hallucination or something..._

He took another drink and closed his eyes tightly.

_Maybe if I just ignore it, it'll go away..._

"Shishou, **_please!_**" Kenshin said forcefully, a hint of desperation creeping into his voice. He was well used to people shunning him, but he just couldn't bear having such a reaction from his own master... It just hurt too much. "Say something... yell at me if you wish... **_anything_**... but please, please don't ignore me!" He dropped down to his knees in front of the older man.

Somewhat disturbed by the pain in his student's voice, Hiko finally opened his eyes to meet the apparition's distraught gaze. Hallucination or not, he really didn't like seeing his apprentice suffer like this.

"But... but you're not real!" he said harshly. "You can't be! You're just some figment of my imagination..."

"No, Shishou..." the spirit whispered, relieved that Hiko had finally chosen to acknowledge him. "I swear that I'm not!"

"Then... then how...?" Hiko shook his head sharply. "How is this possible?"

"Do you believe in ghosts?" Kenshin asked quietly, keeping his gaze fixed on his master's face.

"Ghosts...?" The swords-master's eyes widened slightly. "You're a ghost?"

"Hai."

Hiko studied his apprentice for a long moment, before leaning forward slightly, a contemplative look on his face.

"A ghost, eh?" he mused aloud. "Well I suppose that's a bit better than thinking I had become delusional..."

He suddenly glared at his apprentice, baring his teeth in a vicious snarl. "Well then! At least maybe now, you can tell me exactly what the hell you were thinking when you decided to go and kill yourself!"

Kenshin flinched at the rage in his master's face. "I... I know I made a poor decision..."

"Poor decision?" Hiko stared at him incredulously. "Poor decision!" he said again, his voice growing even louder. He took another swig of sake from his jug and stood, towering over the nervous ghost.

"You put everybody through absolute hell, and all you can say is: 'I made a poor decision'! You inconsiderate little brat...!"

"Shishou..."

"Don't you 'Shishou' me, baka!" Hiko shouted angrily. "What the hell possessed you to think that killing yourself would ever seem like a good idea!"

"Anou..." Kenshin muttered, rubbing the back of his head self-consciously. "I, uh, was a bit drunk at the time..."

Hiko could only stare down at his deshi in disbelief as his anger faded somewhat. "Drunk," he stated finally, sitting back down. "You were drunk?" Closing his eyes, the swordsman suddenly heaved an exasperated sigh and massaged the bridge of his nose. "Kami-sama... how did I ever get stuck with such a baka deshi...?"

Hoping for a satisfyingly irate reaction from his student – and getting only silence in return – he glanced up to regard the now dejected looking spirit with some disappointment.

"What, no protest?" he questioned offhandedly. "I was expecting some kind of disagreement at least."

Kenshin miserably bowed his head. "How can I argue with something that's so obviously true?" he sighed. "You were right, and apparently always have been... I **_am_** an idiot..." He clenched his fists in his lap and kept his head down. "I'm a selfish, inconsiderate, brainless son of a bitch who ended up throwing everything away in a stupid moment of weakness, and I deserve every word of your anger."

Hiko blinked, rather taken aback by the apparent self-hatred in Kenshin's declaration, and sighed slightly in regret.

_They were right... he really has changed. Only five years ago, he would have been insulted; he would have been arguing with me... I was so hoping..._

He suddenly blanched, his eyes widening in shock.

_Wait... "selfish, inconsiderate, brainless son of a bitch..."? Kuso!_

Those were the exact words he had used back in Kenshin's room in Kyoto, after he had broken down into tears...! Hiko sat frozen, a mortified blush spreading across his face.

_He saw! Oh gods... he saw all that!_

It was Kenshin's turn to glance up at the silence that met his words. He did a startled double-take and stared, absolutely fascinated by the embarrassed color on his master's face. **_Hiko_** was blushing! But what had brought that on? The ghost mulled over what he had just said, but couldn't find anything that might have embarrassed the older man.

"Shishou, what's wrong...?"

"That **_was_** you..." Hiko whispered in horrified realization. "There... back in the room... you were there... watching me?" His face reddened further. "The whole time?"

Suddenly understanding, Kenshin began to fidget uneasily.

"Anou..."

"Oh gods!" Hiko hunched down and covered his face with one hand.

The corner of Kenshin's mouth twitched slightly, somewhat amused by his master's reaction. "Surely, it can't be as bad as all that..." he said lightly. "I thought it was rather sweet actually..."

"Oh just shut up," the swordsman grumbled irritably.

Smiling faintly, Kenshin obliged.

He remained silent for a long moment, recalling everything his master said back in Kyoto. Suddenly feeling uncertain, he broke the silence. "Did you really mean it?" he murmured hesitantly.

Still nursing his embarrassment, Hiko glanced up from his hand. "What on earth are you babbling about?" he scowled. "Mean what?"

Kenshin bowed his head. "Back in the room... you said that you would have taken me back... that I could have just come home..." Timidly, he looked up to meet Hiko's gaze. "Did you really mean it?"

Feeling uncomfortable, Hiko abruptly stood up and started back towards the cabin. "Baka..." he grumbled brusquely. "I thought I was alone, in a room with nothing but a corpse... what the hell do you think?"

Slightly encouraged, Kenshin spoke again. "Shishou?"

The man paused at the door. "What is it now?" he said tiredly.

"Does... does the offer still stand?"

Hiko blinked, and then turned around to face the still kneeling ghost. He stared at him for a moment, an odd expression on his face. "Kenshin..." he said slowly. "Are you asking permission to haunt me?"

Kenshin opened his mouth, and then snapped it closed with a startled expression. "I never really though of it like that," he murmured. "I guess I am, in a way..."

His master was quiet for a minute, thinking it over. "And what would you do if I said no?" he asked coolly, curious to see what his student's reaction would be.

Kenshin sagged slightly, a flicker of hurt crossing his face briefly before he quickly hid it behind his own indifferent mask. "Then I would leave," he murmured quietly. "I would not force my presence on you if you do not wish it..."

Hiko sighed. "You really are such a baka..." he muttered, shaking his head wryly. He turned and disappeared into the hut.

Saddened, the ghost stared at the empty doorway.

_He... he didn't answer me..._

He suddenly gave a start as he was struck by one significant detail...

_But... he didn't exactly tell me 'no' either_

With a small hopeful smile, the spirit stood up and followed his master inside.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

So, was this chapter everything you'd hoped? I wasn't satisfied with it, but then again, I'm never satisfied with anything I write. Thanks to SiriusFan13, who pointed out a couple of minor wording fixes, I'm feeling a lot better about it though. Hope you all liked it! Next chapter will probably be rather short, but definitely interesting to say the least. Ahh... the repercussions of drinking too much sake... ;)

Oh my! So many wonderful reviews... I'm so happy! Unfortunately, I think I'm going to have to stop responding to every review I get... I've always enjoyed trying to respond personally to each one, but this section is becoming way too long... It took me almost two days to find time to finish writing them all! Anyway, after this chapter I think I'll only have a general thank you and list your names, and only respond directly if there's something in particular I want to comment on, or if you ask a question... I'm sorry; I hope you all don't mind...

Reviewer Responses

Nekotsuki – Thanks again for the pointers on writer's block; I really appreciated it :) And I'm really glad you liked the chapter! Hopefully this one will meet with your approval as well!

Sailor-Earth13 – Well, here's the next chapter finally! Sorry again for taking so long... I hope you like it!

princess-oro – heh... yeah Hiko is pretty scary isn't he! Yes, I have seen Harry Potter... that poster you mentioned sounds rather amusing :) I'm not really sure how many chapters this story will end up being... I originally planned to end it a bit after the reunion, and start up a new story chronicling their adventures together, but I decided I'd rather just leave it all together as one fic.

xZig-zagx – I'm really glad you liked the chapter, and thanks for the good luck wishes on my job! I may hate the job itself, but at least I ended up with a great group of people to work with!

SiriusFan13 – I'm so glad you loved the chapter! And thanks again for reading this chapter before I posted it, and letting me know what should be fixed! I'm so relieved you didn't think it sucked :)

Swirly – So I almost made you cry for that chapter? Wow... that seems to happen a lot for this story; I think the majority of my reviewers have mentioned getting all teary during one chapter or another... Hopefully after the next chapter, humor will become more of the focus :)

BakaBokken – I'm so happy you're enjoying the fic so much! And thanks for being understanding about the potential delays in updating :) As you said, real life unfortunately always takes precedence over writing... So, when you have more people join KQEC, you'll send FFnet a petition? That's cool... how many people do you think it'll take?

crimsonsun-rk – You're absolutely right! Everyone goes on about how strong Kenshin is, but Hiko is the real master... :) Heh... every time I watch or read that part in the series where Aoshi wants to defeat Battousai and become the strongest, I always think "yeah right, if you want to become the strongest, you'd have to beat out Hiko first..." Hiko rocks!

Terry-McElrath – Thank you again for all your encouragement! I'm really glad you think my chapters are worth waiting for... it's really sweet of you to say! I feel the same way about your story... I look forward to your updates, but I'm always willing to wait as long as it takes :)

Crystal Snowflakes – I'm glad you're enjoying it! It is pretty funny to see Kenshin scared of Hiko as a ghost... He's only been dead a couple days; I'd imagine it takes a while to get used to the changes :)

Peacebunnie – Heh, yeah... Go Hiko! Thanks again for reviewing, and I really enjoyed your own stories as well! I look forward to seeing where you go with "Merciful Dreams"!

Mip the Demon Fox – Glad to see you're still liking the story! I hope Hiko's reaction was worth waiting for...

Streetwise Girl – Yeah, I always liked Okita too :) The Ishin Shishi... yeah they sure did betray a lot of trust. I've always hated politics... Heh... huggling Hiko... scary thought ;)

a.k.a. Arashi – Wow, you actually got goosebumps? I'm glad you think I'm doing such a good job at portraying Hiko :) Now that the two have been reunited, I hope I can pull off their interaction as well... And thanks again for offering to help me out if I need it :) I appreciate it!

Marlingrl – I'm so happy you like my characterization of Hiko! And I'm definitely flattered you think I'm a good writer... (blushes) I look forward to the next update for your own story as well! I think your version of Hiko is great too :) He's so wonderfully intimidating when he's pissed!

Katherat – I'm so sorry for keeping you waiting for so long... I hope their meeting was worth it!

no one's friend – Of course I'll forgive you! I don't mind if you didn't review before; I'm just thrilled you liked it so much!

kawaiimeeh – I'm so glad you like my story! I'm sorry for taking so long to update, but unfortunately trying to build my bank account back up has a much higher priority... (sigh)

Night-Owl123 – Glad you liked the chapter! Hope you like this one as well!

Shaolin 10 – I'm so sorry to hear about all the problems you're having... I hope things improve for you soon! And thanks for offering to help me out if I need it; I really appreciate it :) I already had "Black Dream" saved on my computer, and Terry was nice enough to email me the chapters of "Sword of Ice"... so I'm happy I'll at least be able to read those over again. I hope someday you'll be able to start working on your stories again; I've really missed seeing updates from you...

Anime#1Fan – I'm so sorry I took so long to update! I know you reviewed 3 times begging for chapter 12, so I hope this chapter was worth the long wait! If not, I'm so sorry! (sobs)

skenshingumi – I'm glad you really love this story, and that you don't think my writing is overly sentimental... Hopefully you'll still think so after this chapter! I thought it got too sappy myself... Thanks for wishing me luck on my job! I really need all the luck I can get...

omasuoniwabanshi – I am so glad you're still enjoying my story! I will try to get into a little more depth on what else may have caused Hiko to become the way he is... but I'm still a little fuzzy on the details myself :)

Battousai-dono or Annatar – I see you've changed your name a couple times since you reviewed :) Sorry the reunion was delayed for so long... I hope you liked it!

A lilmatchgirl – Yeah, Hiko is awesome when he's angry :) That scene with the politician was so fun to write!

Unseen Watcher – Okay, it wasn't really violent... :)

moeru himura – sorry about the urn... it does keep making an appearance, doesn't it? But it's necessary. I hope the reunion was worth the long wait! And thanks so much for wishing me good luck on my job! That was really nice of you :)

Freda Potter – I'm really happy you enjoy this story, even though you don't usually like AU fics :) I'm not a really big fan of most of them myself.

Miranda Crystal-Bearer – Thank you! I'm glad you like how I'm portraying Hiko... I'm so relieved that I seem to be doing a good job with his character. Yeah, I have a tendency to lapse into more modern speech patterns sometimes... I try to keep it to a minimum, but it slips out sometimes. And thanks also for reviewing "Frigid Waters"! I'm glad you liked it, as nerve-wracking as it was :) Heh... I know what you mean about winter... I hate being cold! That's why we moved to Florida :) Of course hurricanes are not fun either...

camillian – Sorry the chapter was so short, and that it took so long to update! I have a hard time writing long chapters for some reason, and work just keeps me so busy to write much anymore...

Crystal Renee – I'm glad you like the story! Yeah, Hiko is a tough character to write, but it's fun to try :) I'm glad I seem to be doing a good job with him!

Sessy-chan – I'm really glad you liked the humorous touches I added :) And you bringing up the idea of possession... I hadn't even considered that possibility... hmm... It's definitely something to think about :) Thanks! And I'm really sorry for not updating sooner! Please don't send Hannya after me! I'm trying my best, but real life unfortunately keeps getting in the way...

Thread-Spool – I sure do tend to drag things out, don't I? It's not really intentional. Glad you like the story though! Yes, more characters will end up making an appearance :)

Scented Candles – I'm so happy you're enjoying this story! That part with the paintings was so fun to write; I'm glad that you liked them :)

TattleTale – Well, you finally get your wish! Hiko and Kenshin interaction! Hopefully, it was worth the wait... And I'm really glad you don't think Hiko seems OOC... although after this chapter and the next, I hope you still think so...

sRoze – My goodness! Thank you so much! That is definitely the longest review I've ever gotten! I'm very glad you liked my efforts at being realistic, and the humor too. Kenshin's interaction with Tomoe was a little hard to write; I wasn't too thrilled with the way it came out myself. To answer some of your questions though... Tomoe'd been dead about four years by the time he killed himself. Kenshin's depressed state of mind... I never really gave much thought to anything specific that might have triggered it... Maybe I'll try to add that in the story somewhere. Well, thanks again for such a thorough review! I'm really happy you like the story so much!

Lady Battousai654 – I'm glad you love the story! I'm really flattered you think I'm an awesome writer... Well, Hiko can see Kenshin now :) It really would have been pretty awkward if he couldn't...

JMJV – Thanks for the review! Sorry the chapters are so short... I have a hard time making them longer for some reason.

Mukyuu Tenshi – Thank you! I'll try my best to keep up the good work!

Katie – I'm really glad you like the story! Heh... Kenshin's ghost bothering Saitou is something that will probably happen, so you'll get your wish eventually :)

sueb262 – I'm happy you like the story! And thanks again for listening to me about my father's death... It was really nice of you to be so supportive; I really appreciated it!

senbi – Thanks again for reviewing! I'm really happy that you've enjoyed the story so far! I thought it was really cute how you had Kenshin and Okita actually playing janken in your insanity fic :) I'm planning something for that particular painting sometime soon... I hope you'll like what I come up with! So the Chinese do that too with the bones? I didn't know that.

Zanza-Chan – Glad you liked the story! Even though it looks like you cried through most of it... sorry about that :) I've apparently made a lot of people cry with this... And yes, (hopefully) I will finish this fic eventually :) It might take a while though.

Author-chan – Oh my, thank you so much for reviewing! I'm thrilled that you like my story! Yes, I actually do plan to have Hiko forgive Katsura sometime. You really want to draw one of the paintings? I would be honored! I've always wondered what they would look like actually drawn out :)

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Glossary of terms:

yare yare – an interjection, commonly translated as "Oh well", "Good grief", "Oh brother", etc.

kuso - an expletive (bad word)


	13. Question!

Disclaimer: I don't own... (sigh) Oh the hell with it. No one reading this really cares anyway.

Gomen nasai! Lo siento! Es tut mir leid! Spiacente! Je suis désolé! I'm so sorry! Please forgive my lateness in updating, but I've been in a bit of a depressive slump lately and really haven't much felt like writing. I won't go into details, so I'll just say "life sucks" and move on. On a more positive note, I got to go see System of a Down in concert last month and had a lot of fun :) I decided to name this chapter after one of my favorite songs by them; it seemed fitting somehow... Also, I've started taking a creative writing course in college, which seems like it'll be fun, and hopefully beneficial to my writing efforts; and a good friend of mine from the Army had finally come back to the states after a whole year in Iraq! Of course, because "life sucks", the poor guy's getting shipped back off to Korea in a couple months...

Anyway! Enough of my stupid rambling, and on with the story! Hope you can tolerate the crappy fruits of my writer's slump ;P (slinks off and hides under a rock)

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 13: Question!

_He's here... he really is here..._

Outwardly composed, Hiko turned his back on the specter and stepped inside, his thoughts and emotions in turmoil... whirling and spinning crazily, making him almost dizzy from it all.

The swords-master glanced down at the jug still clutched tightly in his hand. Or perhaps it was just the sake that was making him dizzy? He shrugged. After quickly downing the rest of the contents, he abruptly grinned, feeling more alive than he had in a very long while.

Kenshin was back. Ghost or not, his little baka deshi had finally come home.

Hiko's satisfied smile vanished as a sudden thought came to mind.

_But why? Why now? _

Frowning, Hiko set down the now empty sake container and turned, waiting impatiently for Kenshin to follow him in. There were still a lot of things that he needed to ask his late student.

After a few moments had passed, the swordsman grew mildly concerned that maybe his answer to Kenshin's question had been too vague. Belatedly, he remembered that grasping subtlety had not exactly been one of his deshi's strong points. As bright as the boy had been, he could be exasperatingly dense at times. Hiko had not come right out and told the ghost he could stay... Had Kenshin, in his typically clueless fashion, perhaps not understood?

Hiko took a step towards the door – preparing to go out and retrieve the little idiot if necessary – when the red-head finally appeared, lingering uncertainly in the doorway, an almost timid expression on his face. A sharp ache tightened his chest, as Hiko was painfully reminded of the withdrawn, abused slave Kenshin had been when he had first taken him in.

The older man scowled, shoving the memory of that sad, broken child away. "Well, what the hell are you doing way over there?" he snapped. "Are you coming in or not?"

Kenshin's eyes widened slightly and he suddenly relaxed, smiling faintly. "Hai Shishou," he murmured, finally entering the hut. The pair stood staring at each other for a long moment, a tense, awkward silence filling the room as they contemplated their rather unusual situation.

Hiko broke the silence first. "Sit," he said gruffly, gesturing to the floor.

Kenshin hastily sat down, and watched as his master turned and headed over to a cabinet in the far corner. After pulling out a smaller bottle and a drinking dish, Hiko returned, settling himself down across from where his apprentice was sitting.

He poured a small amount of sake into the little cup, and sipped at it slowly, savoring the strong, heady flavor. It was a much more expensive brand than Hiko usually drank; in an odd moment of sentimentality, he had bought it and been saving it for his deshi's eventual return. Long ago, he had promised Kenshin that someday he would pour sake for the both of them, but seeing as how that was no longer an option... Hiko sighed regretfully and took another drink. He supposed that this seemed as good a time as any to finally finish it off.

Feeling more relaxed (and somewhat pleasantly lightheaded by this time), Hiko glanced up to study the sad-eyed ghost across from him.

_It's too strange... Not all that long ago, I was watching Kenshin's corpse go up in flames, and now he's sitting here right in front of me as if none of it ever happened. He doesn't even look like what I figured a ghost would look like... it's almost as if he was still alive... _

He raised a contemplative eyebrow.

_Hmm... In fact... except for the scar, and the fact that he's filled out a little, he really doesn't look all that much different from when he was a kid. _

Grinning slyly, the slightly inebriated man decided to have a little fun at his student's expense.

He heaved a dramatic sigh, shaking his head in mock disgust. "Well damn, I was really hoping you'd grow out of that."

"Nani?" Wide, violet eyes blinked confusedly, as the ghost cocked his head slightly to the side.

The swordsman rolled his eyes in exasperation, waving his hand in a vague gesture. "That's exactly what I'm talking about!" he declared, confusing the ghost even further. "I mean, just look at you! You're still just too damn cute!"

The red-head gaped at his master for a moment and then bristled. "I am _not_ cute!" he protested heatedly.

Hiko snorted. "Feh... you look like a little girl..."

"Shishou..." Kenshin's eyebrow began to twitch.

"Such a scrawny little thing too..."

"Shishou!"

"Terrifying, my ass. I'll bet your opponents all took one look at you and laughed themselves to death."

"_Shishou!_"

Hiko pretended to ignore him, delighted with the results of his heckling so far.

_Aha! There he is... Now _that's_ the Kenshin I like to see!_

Tapping his finger contemplatively on the side of his chin, Hiko resumed his game. "Maybe if you cut your hair or something, you'd look less feminine..." he mused out loud.

Kenshin grit his teeth. "Considering the fact that I'm dead, a haircut is not exactly possible at the moment. And since we're on the subject of long hair..." The spirit glared. "Why don't you cut your own?"

Hiko smirked. "I look good with long hair," he stated smugly. "Even with it, I'm still a flawless example of masculinity. You, on the other hand, just look like a pretty girl."

Kenshin made a hissing noise between his teeth. "Do you enjoy trying to piss me off?"

"Of course I do." The swords-master arched a casual eyebrow. "Is it working?"

"Hai," the ghost sourly replied.

"Well then... good."

Kenshin dropped his head in his hands. The former hitokiri was coming dangerously close to pouting. What on earth was it about Hiko Seijuro the thirteenth that always made him feel like a petulant little child?

He knew damn well that his master was merely trying to provoke him, and yet he continually allowed the man to get under his skin. It may have been that Kenshin was just a temperamental teenager, but he had an odd sense that Hiko would probably still have the same effect on him even if he was nearing his thirties...

He sighed. "Why exactly did I come back here again?"

Hiko shrugged carelessly. "You missed my stunning wit and charming personality?"

"Oh, yes of course," the red-head grumbled, not bothering to mask his sarcasm. "That _must_ be it."

Leaning back against the wall, Hiko raised his cup to his lips, hiding his satisfied smile. Oh, how he had missed this...

He had always enjoyed getting a rise out of his little apprentice. During Kenshin's younger days, Hiko's insults had originally started as a frustrated, last-ditch effort to drag the submissive slave out of his shell after all other attempts had failed. Surprised and thrilled by his unexpected success, he had then added the taunting into their training as a way to toughen the child against the harassment he would no doubt be subject to because of his diminutive stature and delicate, rather feminine appearance.

However, Kenshin's indignant reaction to some of his more colorful taunts had become a source of much amusement to the older man, and one of the main reasons he had loved teasing the boy to the extent that he did. Life had just been so boring without his deshi there to annoy the hell out of. But now that Kenshin had returned...

The swordsman suddenly frowned, reminded that he still had several questions to ask his wayward apprentice. Playtime was over. Disappointedly, he turned back to the ghost, all the humor gone from his expression.

"I do wonder though..."

Kenshin looked up, startled by the abrupt shift in mood. "Shishou?"

"Why?" Hiko began after a brief silence, strangely subdued. "Why exactly _did_ you come back now?" He shot his deshi a piercing glare. "Why the hell did you wait until you were dead before you finally decided to come home?"

The red-head blinked at the slightly bitter tone, and ducked his head, his expression rueful. "Forgive me Shishou, but I honestly thought you hated me after the way we had parted," he replied softly. "I thought maybe you wouldn't have wanted me to come back."

The other man flinched inwardly.

_And why wouldn't he believe that? _Hiko thought almost guiltily. _ I had never really given him any indication that I felt otherwise._

Feeling tired, he rested the back of his head on the wall behind him. "I never hated you, Kenshin..." the swordsman murmured absently, almost to himself. "I hated that you had left... I hated what you had done... but I could never hate _you_..."

Kenshin's eyes widened in surprise, and then narrowed. "Are you drunk?" he asked suspiciously. His master had been drinking almost non-stop since he had left Kyoto (not to mention the whole jug he had polished off before the funeral), and the ghost figured the man _had_ to be drunk in order to admit something like that.

"What!" Hiko hastily dragged his attention back from where it had wandered. "I am most certainly _not_ drunk," Hiko snapped defensively. "Unlike _some_ people, I actually know how to hold my liquor. Baka deshi..." he trailed off irritably, muttering various epithets under his breath.

Kenshin leaned back, studying his master doubtfully, trying to decide whether the man was telling the truth or not. With a man like Hiko, whose alcohol tolerance was simply mind-boggling, it was rather hard to tell. The student had never actually seen his teacher drunk before. However, he had never seen him drink more than two jugs in a single day either, and he had already finished off – the ghost did a quick mental count – three large jugs and half a bottle?

He sweat-dropped. It was beyond belief how any human being could remain completely lucid after such a large amount of alcohol.

Nevertheless, he was aware that something was definitely off. Most people would never be able to see a difference, but after five years of living together, Kenshin was familiar enough with Hiko's usual reticent nature that he could tell that his master's iron restraint had slipped a notch.

Shrewdly recognizing that now was a perfect opportunity to pry some answers from the usually taciturn man, the ghost decided to take advantage of the situation.

"You claim that you didn't hate me, but what about the way you always treated me growing up?" Kenshin demanded. "Like I was nothing more than some annoying pest you merely put up with? After all I've seen the last couple of days, I know you cared about me. So why didn't you ever let me know?"

This time the flinch was visible.

"Why? You want to know why didn't I tell you?" Uncomfortably, the swords-master looked away again, unable to meet his student's accusing gaze. "I just _couldn't_, that's all..."

The red-head shook his head. "Shishou, please! That's not an answer!" he protested desperately. "I need to know why you felt it was necessary to make me think that you hated me!"

"You mean other than the fact that I thought it was fun?" Hiko tried halfheartedly. At Kenshin's annoyed glare, Hiko sighed, rubbing his face tiredly. A feeling of melancholy suddenly swept over him.

_I suppose there's really no point in keeping it a secret any longer. After all, with Kenshin being dead, the main reason I had for treating him the way I did, really doesn't apply anymore. _

Steeling himself, Hiko nodded stiffly. "Very well," he muttered, resignation in his voice. "I guess I do owe you something of an explanation..." Feeling a bit awkward, the swordsman hesitated for a moment; he had never been comfortable with heart-to-heart discussions.

After thinking it over, he gave a mental shrug. He currently had enough alcohol in his system to where he finally decided he didn't really care at the moment (although dimly aware that he would no doubt find himself regretting the whole thing in the morning).

Hiko finally dropped his mask and looked up, his apprentice gaping at the almost gentle look in the man's eyes.

"Mostly, it was because I needed you to hate _me,_" the swords-master murmured, deliberately meeting Kenshin's gaze."Telling you how I really felt would have just been pure selfishness on my part." Unsteadily, he got to his feet, pausing briefly for the sudden dizziness to pass, and began pacing the room. His gaze became unfocused as his thoughts drifted to the past.

"Better to be hated by my own son, than live with the knowledge that I would cause him to suffer far worse by being kind..."

"N..nani...?" Kenshin gasped, his eyes wide with shock. "Shishou... what are you talking about?"

"The ougi, Kenshin," Hiko quietly replied, pausing in his restless pacing to stare unseeingly at the wall. "The Amakakeru Ryu No Hirameki. I didn't want you to get too attached to the man you would eventually have to kill."

Frozen in place by his master's words, Kenshin was struck speechless, his mind reeling dizzily.

_The ougi? What? Kill...? What did he mean by that? Why would I have to kill my own master?_

"Shishou...?" he questioned faintly. "I would have had to kill you? I don't understand!"

Hiko lowered himself back to the floor with a weary sigh. "Kenshin..." he spoke tiredly. "Haven't you ever wondered why our sword style is so rare? Why there aren't more students of Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu?"

Kenshin shook his head slightly. "I guess I never really thought about it."

The master sighed again and started to explain: "From the beginning, there has only been one master and apprentice at any time, and it's because of the ougi, the final attack to be passed down for complete mastery." Feeling slightly dizzy again, he closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall.

"The succession technique is inevitably fatal. To the teacher, if the passing down is successful, or to the student, if he fails. I...I too learned the ougi at the cost of my master's life."

Kenshin stared at his master in sudden understanding. Conjuring up memories of those earlier days, he saw now what hadn't been so clear back then. He remembered that his master had been quite different those first few months. Hiko had always been rather distant, but he had tried to be patient, almost gentle with the traumatized child Kenshin had been. But right around the time Kenshin had started becoming more comfortable around his master, Hiko had abruptly changed. He had distanced himself even further, using sarcasm and contempt to keep the child at bay. At the time, Kenshin had been confused, even hurt, by the man's sudden apparent rejection.

So many years of misunderstanding his master's intent and motives... but it was all so obvious now, what the man had been trying to accomplish.

"You pushed me away to protect me. You didn't want me to be hurt." the ghost said softly.

"In part," Hiko nodded wearily, opening his eyes with some difficulty and giving him a somber look. "You had been through so much in your life; I was afraid that it would devastate you... to kill someone you cared for." He shrugged listlessly and closed his eyes again. "Apparently I was right."

_Kenshin... All the people you killed may have affected you deeply, but it was Tomoe's death by your hand that caused the most damage, wasn't it? Because you loved her. The guilt, the anguish... It ate away at you... festering like an infected wound... killing you slowly over time just as I had feared would happen. I'm so sorry... I wanted... I wanted to protect you from ever feeling that kind of pain... _

Hiko's thoughts drifted away as consciousness fled.

Waiting to see if his master would add anything more, Kenshin gave a startled blink as the older man's quiet breathing slowed and settled into a much deeper rhythm.

"Shishou?" he questioned uncertainly.

There was no answer from the swords-master.

Kenshin blinked again.

_He fell asleep? Well, it's no wonder with all that sake he drank. On top of that, I really don't think he's gotten much rest over the last few days. His exhaustion must have finally caught up to him_

"Gomen, Shishou," Kenshin murmured. "I really have put you through a lot, haven't I?" He bowed his head regretfully. "Not just recently, but throughout all these years as well..."

He rose to his feet and quietly retrieved a blanket from the pile in the corner. Crouching down, the spirit gently tucked it around his master's shoulders. With a fond smile, he studied the sleeping man's face. It was a rare occasion that he got a chance to see Hiko in such a relaxed state. Kenshin reached out and brushed away a strand of hair from his master's face.

_He looks so peaceful now... I've never seen him quite like this before._

The spirit settled back to keep affectionate watch as his master slept, wishing to preserve that hard-earned tranquility.

"You called me your son, Shishou..." he softly whispered, his voice trembling slightly with emotion. "I'll never forget you said that." The ghost's contented smile turned slightly wicked.

"And you had better believe I'll never let you forget it either..."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I'm still not really satisfied with how this came out... I think it's overly sentimental and that it sucks, but SiriusFan13 has assured me that it _doesn't_ suck, so I guess I'll trust her opinion over mine, since I just generally hate most of my own writing anymore. Also, she's also been sweet enough to draw me another fanart for this story! Hiko blushing... so cute :) Here's the link: www(dot)fanart-central(dot)net/pic-275418(dot)html. Enjoy!

I've heard the rumors, and even signed that petition that had been circulating, about ffdotnet not allowing reviewer responses anymore. I have not been able to find anything in their policies that substantiates this claim, so I'm just going to write it off as a rumor and continue to reply to your wonderful reviews :) Although, even if it was true, I'd still do it anyway. Hahaha... look at me! I'm a rebel! (snorts)

Reviewer Responses

Heh... I noticed that a lot of you really liked that "permission to haunt" line in the last chapter :) I'm glad I could make you laugh; I got a kick out of writing it myself. It seemed so perfect!

A big thank you goes out to: Crystal Snowflakes, Sailor-Earth13, kawaii meeh, Hitokiri Musei, Mip the Demon Fox, A lilmatchgirl, Night-Owl123, Katherat, Crystal Renee, AthranZallaLover, Angel8818, dragon618543, musicsage, and Vampiress-Alexiel. Thanks for reviewing! I'm so happy you guys are enjoying this fic, and I hope you'll stick with me and continue to enjoy it! Even if I do take months to update... (sigh) So sorry about that.

And now for individual responses...

sueb262 – Thanks for reviewing all my chapters :) I'm thrilled that you enjoyed them so much! Your wonderful comments and support have really meant a lot to me :D I know that you prefer the angst involved, but I do plan on humor being more prevalent in the storyline now. But don't worry; there will still be angst :)

Terry-McElrath – Once again, thank you for all your wonderful support and patience :) I've tried not to stress too much about my not updating quickly, but it's bothered me all the same... I hate leaving everybody hanging like that.

SiriusFan13 – Thank you so much for everything! I don't know what I'd do without you! And a big :P for not being able to go through with your threat! Hehehe :)

a.k.a. Arashi – I'm happy you liked the way the reunion went :) I had stressed over that for a long time trying to figure out how exactly Hiko should react to that initial meeting! I hope you like this chapter too, if you get a chance to read it. I understand you've been really busy lately. I hope you're still doing well!

BakaBokken – Ack. You were absolutely right about all those ellipses! I don't know what the heck I was thinking there. I went back and removed a lot of them and reposted the chapter along with this one. Thank you for pointing that out for me :) And thanks for sticking with me; I'm really happy you're still enjoying the fic so far!

Streetwise Girl – I'm glad you enjoyed that chapter! Hehe... The little Katsura visit scene you wrote made me laugh :) And yes, I actually do have a scene already written out where Kenshin decides to cook for Hiko :)

crimsonsun-rk / crimsonsun37 – I see you've altered your name a bit... Yes, I completely agree that the government is corrupt. I pretty much refuse to watch the news much anymore because of all the political crap going on. All it does is raise my blood pressure, or makes me want to cry... As for your question about Hiko being able to see Kenshin, I guess I answered that in this chapter :)

Peacebunnie – Thank you for such a flattering review :) I'm so happy that you think my characterizations are believable; that's one of the things I stress about the most, and I always think I'm doing a lousy job. I'm not sure, but I'm thinking that the story will probably run at least through the series' timeline... so that would be maybe 11 years or maybe more. Of course I have no intention of describing the whole 11 years! I'll skip around a bit :) Thanks again for emailing me with your encouragement :)

Anime#1Fan – (blushes) Thank you so much for all your praise... you're definitely my most enthusiastic reviewer :) It really makes me happy to know you're enjoying my efforts so much! And thank you for your good luck wishes on my job... I really need all the luck I can get at that place (sigh). Yeah, it is definitely exhausting. One of the reasons why I don't feel much like writing a whole lot. And yes, I do intend to have Katsura come back at some point, and I will include Saitou and Okita as well, so no worries there :) Published? (blushes again) Ooh, I don't think so...

WolfDaughter – You are so right... real life really can suck! Thanks, by the way, for the birthday wishes; that was really sweet of you! Hehe... I find it kind of neat that I can make people laugh and cry in the same chapter... I enjoy writing humor/angst for some reason, and I'm glad you like the results!

no one's friend – hehe... are you crying because you're happy I updated, or disappointed? ;)

senbi – Yeah, Hiko is definitely not someone you want to piss off :) Scary man! Heh... I'm glad you got some use out of the jaken idea :) Well, I definitely have plans for a meeting with Saitou and Okita :) Okita isn't dead yet at this point in the story; he dies in May, and it's only January right now. Other meetings I'm still a bit hazy on, although I do have some ideas :)

xZig-zagx – So you thought it was worth the wait? I'm glad :) Hope you like this one too!

omasuoniwabanshi – Thanks again for the lovely review! I'm so happy that you didn't think that Hiko was OOC in that chapter; I had really worried a lot about that. Now as for this chapter... I hope I didn't ruin that impression too much :)

princess-oro – Yes, I will be including other characters :) Am I a Tomoe-lover or a Tomoe-hater? Hmm... Well neither I guess. I just like her; she's an interesting character :) I never could understand why so many fans are so hostile towards her...

skenshingumi – That was such a wonderful review! I really am happy that you loved the way the chapter came out, and that you enjoyed my attempts to blend humor into the story :) I try to avoid pure angst, because that's kind of the way I am in real life too... Humor helps me to be able to cope with bad situations. Once again though, I hope I didn't go too overboard with the sap in this chapter...

Mir – Yes, it is an odd concept, isn't it? I'm glad that the idea grew on you :)

Lady Battousai654 – I'm so happy that you liked the chapter! I'm sorry that the flashback scene was a bit confusing at first though; I wasn't sure how to make it more obvious without resorting to putting a (flashback) ahead of it :)

Blaze Coyotlhart – Welcome back! I'm glad you liked the image of Hiko blushing :) That just popped into my head and I just had to write it! If you do decide to draw it, I'd love to see how it comes out, if you can figure out a way to show me :D Maybe you could email it, or post it on one of those fan sites?

moeru himura – The best chapter? I'm glad you think so, and that you thought it was worth the wait! Hehe... I love ruining a good dramatic moment with well placed humor :D And you're right about people doing weird stuff when they're drunk; I work in a bar, so believe me I know... (sigh) I hate drunks...

Unseen Watcher – I'm sorry for taking so long to update! Don't worry though, I have no intention to stop writing! It may take me a while to finish the chapters, but I definitely won't stop!

Althea M – Welcome aboard :) I'm glad you like the fic! I'll try to add some more of the painting descriptions when I get a chance... Now that Hiko can tease Kenshin to his face, it'll be more fun now ;)

IKnowNot – Thank you again for all your reviews :) Your comments and critique were much appreciated. I'll try to keep what you've said in mind, avoiding the use of boldface italics in the future, and making sure to keep my swearing to a bare minimum. I'm glad that you've enjoyed the story so far even with some of the problems you had with it, and I hope you'll still continue to enjoy it especially after all the sentimental crap in this chapter ;)

wyldcat – Thank you! I'll try to think more positively, but as you may have noticed, I seem to be in a "everything I write is crap" phase. Hopefully I can knock myself out of that. The story will probably end up running for a while, up to and maybe after the series' timeline. But don't worry; I don't plan on describing every single thing that takes place for all 11 years! That would just take _way_ too long... :)

girl from ipanema – I'm really glad you like the story! Well, I do have vague plans about what I intend to do with Kenshin in the future... and while I'm probably going to include Kaoru at some point, a romantic ending for the two of them is not really in those plans. Becoming friends is about all that could be possible. I'm sorry, and I hope that you'll continue to enjoy the fic, even without it having a K/K pairing...

HandsDown – Ooh, another person in the panhandle! Yeah, those bloody hurricanes... I've been a nervous wreck this whole season worried to death that another Ivan would hit us. And then Katrina comes around... I'm grateful we didn't get the brunt of it this time, but my god... those poor people... Living in the Gulf Coast just sucks. I don't blame you for wanting to move! I'd like to move too! But I probably won't for a while. (sigh) Anyway, I'm glad you like the story so far, and thank you for your good luck wishes for finding a new job :) Still hasn't happened yet, but maybe some day!

Nemesis Jedi – I'm happy you're enjoying the story :) You're right, poor Hiko needed a bit of a break; he's had a rotten time of it these last couple of days! Well, you got your wish for a fanart of Hiko blushing :) SiriusFan13 did a really nice job on hers! I loved getting a chance to actually see it drawn out. Yeah, Shaolin10 took all her stories down a while back TT "Black Dream" was basically a story about young Kenshin falling extremely ill, and Hiko was trying to take care of him; and "Sword of Ice" was a sequel where Kenshin gets kidnapped by one of Hiko's enemies and Hiko had to try and save him. She never finished that one though (pouts). My version of Hiko is kind of based loosely on hers, in that there's that caring, father/son relationship with them.

Chibi Binasu-chan – Hehe, you've lucked out in that you haven't had to wait as long as everyone else for an update :) I'm glad you like it! A fluffy Hiko... (giggles) Well, plenty of that in this chapter; hope you like!


	14. APRIL FOOLS DAY 2009!

Disclaimer: I don't own any of it… at all. Really… You have no idea…

**_WARNING! THIS IS AN APRIL FOOLS DAY CHAPTER WRITTEN BY SIRIUSFAN13! NOT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY :P_**

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

**_Created_** by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 14: Unchained Melody

Hiko wasn't sure how late he had slept. All that he was certain of was that when he'd awoken the next morning, the previous night was only a very blurry memory fighting for precedence with the katana being driven into his skull. The great swordsman had never actually been hungover before.

He didn't like it.

He also didn't like the fact that he wasn't quite sure where Kenshin was. Now that he was (mostly) sober, it was occurring to him that things had gotten just a bit too_… mushy _last night. What if the baka got the wrong idea? He _was _a girly little bugger…

Hiko grunted at that thought, banishing it from his mind, as he stood a bit unsteadily. Ridiculous and inappropriate. Only crazed females with too much time on their hands would think of something as disturbing and just plain _wrong _as that… And anyway… Kenshin wasn't tangible…

He twitched slightly.

_Kuso…_ _I wish I could remember just what I said last night. All I can remember is blushing a lot and getting tucked in…_

Much to his discomfort, Hiko blushed again.

To take his mind off of these disturbing thoughts, Hiko walked over to his kiln, and began working on his pottery. Specifically, he began making some nice, manly sake jugs. At least with pottery, he didn't have to think. He was skilled enough to just focus on the clay, and enjoy the moment. Sadly, after working for _several _moments that amounted to over an hour, he was still not doing much enjoying. He sighed, looking at the blob of half-formed clay before him. It looked a bit like a vase… or a bowl. It was huge, but still probably not big enough to contain all of the sake he'd downed last night. He poked at it, and the wall dented. It was hideous, looking more like something his deshi would have created.

Hiko sighed, and mashed it up, preparing to re-knead the clay and start over. This was the third one he'd tried today… (he had been too drunk and hung-over to make anything other than a couple of deformed pinchpots earlier). It was getting annoying.

_And speaking of annoying things… _He glanced around, a little concerned. _Where the hell is that baka, anyway? The least he could be doing is keeping me company. If he took off on me again, I'll _kill_… _He allowed that thought to trail off, realizing belatedly how ineffectual it was. Sighing, he fought the urge to go hunting for the boy. Maybe Hiko wasn't the only one who felt awkward after the previous night. It was possible that Kenshin was keeping some distance to reorganize his thoughts. Hiko, for once, really didn't want to intrude.

With everything on his mind, the very _last_ thing he expected was to sense a very strong ki making its way up the mountain… _again_. Once again, it was not Kenshin (obviously), and this time it wasn't Katsura either. _Who the hell is it now_?

He didn't look up. It would be a little while before the owner of the ki arrived. He was probably just a lost traveler. Or another escapee from Kyoto. These days, there were a lot of _those _types. They weren't worth worrying about.

Hiko dripped a little more water on his re-kneaded lump of clay, and began re-forming it.

Anyway, if the ahou decided to try anything, he'd wind up looking a lot like Kenshin, only _this _one wouldn't get sake on his grave… and he sure as hell wouldn't have permission to haunt anyone.

The ki continued its approach. By the time it made its way to the clearing, Hiko's nerves were on edge. Something wasn't right about this. The ki was… off. And the visitor was obviously not just passing through. Still, Hiko wanted the attacker to make the first move.

Slowly, almost hesitantly, the ki approached. When he was directly behind, the swords master tensed, finally preparing himself to attack. Suddenly, a hand was gently laid on his shoulder. A chin gently rested on his head…

_What the _fuck_?_

He tried to attack and found that he couldn't move, or rather, _he_ couldn't control his movements.

What the hell was happening? Who the hell _was _this? _For that matter, _he twitched, _where the hell was this music suddenly coming from?_ It sounded like someone was singing in his head about lonely mountains gazing at stars…

He managed to turn his head to see his "attacker". Of all people, it was a bloody Shinsengumi wolf wearing what looked like fishnets on his arms. He looked as if he were on laughing mushrooms.

_That's it! Kenshin drugged me last night. He put mushrooms in my sake as payback for… well… his childhood, I guess. I'm just hallucinating. The little bastard is probably hiding in the bushes watching me make an ass out of myself. No _wonder_ he's been missing… _Hiko twitched again as the wolf started making pottery with him (and basically squashing the pot). _I'm hallucinating. Good._

The music in his head got louder and more irritatingly sappy as fishnet-san dragged him up to dance. The hulking swordsman _really_ wished he had control of his body at the moment. Hallucination or not, Hiko had an intense desire to Ryu Tsui Sen this freak into the afterlife. Even _further _if possible. This was _far_ beyond disturbing. This made last night feel like a manly get-together. Hiko ground his teeth in frustration. He had to admit that Kenshin had one-upped him with this one (Not that he planned on admitting it to the baka's face, but still…). He would need years of therapy (or a few gallons of sake) to get over this one. _Nothing _could be worse than this. He was sure of it.

Then the wolf leaned in, smiling gently and whispered in a soft, almost inaudible voice, "Wait till we get to the yaoi, Shishou…" There was a wicked gleam in the wolf's lavender eyes.

_Yaoi? Shishou?_ Hiko blinked. _Wait… _lavender_ eyes?_

That was his last conscious thought before blacking out.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It was late in the afternoon, the sun high in the sky, when Hiko woke up. He was asleep in the hut, a sake cup to his side. Blinking in confusion, he looked around, trying to remember why he thought he should be outside.

Then it came to him, and he tried very, _very_ hard to forget.

It had obviously been a dream. The result of far too much sake. But, kami, had it seemed so real. He would never be able to look at Kenshin right again. Or any of the Shinsengumi if (kami forbid) he ever ran into one… Hell, he was considering giving up pottery, too…

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

In a small inn at the center of Kyoto, a wolf woke from a troubled sleep. He'd had a terrible dream about Battousai… or rather Battousai's _ghost_. He shook his head, feeling tainted by the memory of the ghost _inside _of him. But _why_ would he dream such a thing? He glanced down at his arms, a sinking feeling choking him. And for that matter… _why_ did he have fishnet stuff on his arms?

He paused, shuddering again, as more memories surfaced…

It had to be the alcohol. He'd drunk a lot last night. He'd just have to give up sake. That was it. He'd make up an excuse. Tell everyone that it made him want to kill people. That was a good, masculine reason.

He ran his hand over his face, feeling nauseous.

And wait a minute… who the hell was Rita Miller…?

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kenshin smiled to himself, as he hovered around the door of the shack, listening to the disgusted moans of his shishou.

_Payback's a bitch, isn't it Shishou?_

-Owari-

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Author's Note: APRIL FOOLS!** *laughs* Okay, so if you _somehow _haven't figured it out yet, this chapter was not written by lolo popoki. It is written by SiriusFan13. Lolo and I felt that it would be quite amusing to write a parody of each other's next chapters for April Fool's Day. If you would like to read _her_ parody chapter, please check out the newest chapter of _Amethyst and Amber_.

And just so there are no homicides or broken hearts, lolo and I will have REAL updates ready for the incredibly near future. Expect to see the real chapter 14 of _Only the Beginning _very soon! (YAY!)

As to the chapter itself, quick explanation and acknowledgements… First of all (of course) a great big thank you to lolo popoki for creating _Only the Beginning_ and allowing me to play in it for a chapter, as well as for being my beta on the chapter. Also, a huge thanks to A lilmatchgirl for putting the _Ghost _clay idea into lolo's head, so that I could steal it from her! Hehe…

Last major note, for those who didn't get it… Yes, this scene was ripped off from the movie _Ghost_ (check out the chapter title). That's also where the "Rita Miller" reference comes from. And the references to Saito and the fishnet arms come from the manga _Peacemaker Kurogane (PMK)_. If you've read it, you'll get why I chose him as the medium. Saito's character in _PMK_ can see ghosts. The fishnet comment is my own observation. He just looks like he's wearing some kind of fishnet thing on his arms in that manga… I dunno… I always just thought it looked weird…

But anyway, I'm going to shut up now… So, thanks for reading. Please review!

Dewa mata!

Sirius


	15. The Day After

Disclaimer: I own the entire RK anime series, all the movies, 3 soundtracks, all the manga, the profile book, the companion book, and a set of playing cards... does that count? (blinks innocently) How about my Okita figure? No? (sigh) Fine then... I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.

A/N: HOLY CRAP, I LIVE. I am so so so so so so so so sorry it took this long to finish this bloody chapter. I suck. Thank you all so much for your continued support and patience during this long hiatus! I appreciate every single review, favorite, and alert from you wonderful people, and I am so very sorry for not personally responding to most of you during this time. Your gentle (and not so gentle :P) prods to update helped me remember that there are people who are still reading and enjoying this story. I hope this chapter is worth the wait...

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Only the Beginning**

Written by lolo popoki

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Chapter 14: The Day After

In all the years that Hiko had been drinking, he could only remember once having a hangover… and that had been the day after his Shishou had first introduced him to a large jug of sake after his genpuku, and said he wouldn't consider his baka deshi a proper man unless he finished the whole thing.

Well, he had showed that old tyrant. He damn well was a _man_!

And had damn well paid dearly for it the next morning, too. His master had merely laughed mockingly at his student's misery and continued with training as usual.

_Spiteful bastard..._ Hiko thought hazily to himself. _That had to have been the worst day of training ever_.

His eyes still closed, the swordsman bit back a pained groan. He felt a lot like he had back then – rather like someone had taken a hammer to his skull. Maybe not quite as severe as during his inexperienced youth, but it really wasn't that much of an improvement.

Perhaps he should have exercised a little more restraint; apparently, that much sake was too much for even his exceptional tolerance. But really, who could blame him after the last couple of days?

Kenshin – dead – then having the little baka come back as a ghost…

_Unless... unless all that really _was_ a sake-induced hallucination?_

Hiko shook his head sharply to clear away the remaining fuzziness from his mind, and then paused as his nose caught the familiar scent of cooking miso. Headache briefly forgotten, his eyes snapped open and he gawked at the surreal scene that greeted him.

_Well, I guess that answers _that_ question._

"Kenshin," he murmured, trying to hide his astonishment. "What are you doing?"

The red-haired ghost glanced over and smiled, still stirring the pot of miso soup he had somehow managed to prepare. "Ohayo, Shishou," he said. "As you can see, I made you breakfast." He gestured toward the plate of onigiri that sat on the floor in front of him.

"You made me breakfast?" the swords-master repeated, his eyebrow raised.

"Hai, Shishou. I made you breakfast."

"Wait, let me get this straight," Hiko cocked his head in bemusement. "You made me breakfast?"

Kenshin's eyes narrowed, wondering if his master's mind had finally snapped after everything that had happened recently. Even hung-over, he shouldn't be this slow to grasp such a simple concept.

"Aa," he replied cautiously. "I believe we've already established that..."

"But you're _dead! _How the hell are you able to cook?"

"Oh!" Kenshin blinked and then smiled faintly. "Well, I may be dead, but I do have some control over material objects," the ghost explained, picking up a bowl and ladling soup into it. "This is just practice." He set the bowl down in front of his master.

"Ah, I see..." Hiko said thoughtfully. "So you're able to manipulate things in the physical world. That's useful..." He glanced down at the blanket that was wrapped around his shoulders, hesitating briefly as he realized how it must have gotten there, and then uncomfortably decided not to comment. Instead, he forced a scowl on his face as he turned his attention to the rest of the room. "I see you've been doing quite a bit of 'practice' actually," he grumbled, folding up the blanket and laying it aside. "You cleaned, too?"

The swords-master wasn't sure whether to be amused or insulted by the expression of distaste that flickered across the ghost's face.

"It was necessary," Kenshin muttered reproachfully. "This place was an unholy mess. Would it kill you to actually do a little straightening up once in a while?"

Hiko snorted. "Why should I bother? It's not like I ever have visitors."

Shaking his head, the spirit sighed, a wry smile twisting his lips slightly. "You haven't really changed much in five years, have you?"

Smirking, Hiko brushed his hair back from his eyes in a debonair manner. "One doesn't need to change perfection," he proclaimed loftily.

Kenshin raised an eyebrow, that sardonic smile still in place. "Ah, Shishou... as conceited as ever, I see."

"Oi, baka." Not offended in the least, the dark-haired man gave a self-satisfied grin in return. "It's not really conceit if it's true."

With a quiet snort and a roll of his eyes, Kenshin turned to put the fire out in the pit.

Hiko was cautiously pleased. It appeared his deshi had started recovering far more quickly than he had first predicted. After seeing the subdued, insecure young man Kenshin had grown into, he had been worried that he'd have as hard a time of pulling him out of it as he'd had when he was a child. But the question was, was he really coping as well as he appeared? After all, the kind of trauma that Kenshin had lived through over the past few years was not an easy thing to get over so quickly. In the past, his little deshi had been prone to relapse; time would pass where he would seem just fine, and then something would happen, usually something inconsequential, and the swordsman would find the boy curled up the corner, or crouched by the riverbank staring blankly into the water, silent and unresponsive.

Maybe Kenshin was fine, and maybe he wasn't. But he _was_ currently dead, and that would probably play a major hand in Kenshin's present state of mind. Also, having thought all those years that his master hated him and never wanted to see him again, and then finding the exact opposite was true… Forgiveness and acceptance had been known to work wonders, after all.

Hiko decided the best thing to do for now was watch and wait. Be himself. Let things play out how they may; he would be ready for it.

After a reflective moment, he suddenly realized Kenshin was staring at him.

"What the hell's the matter?" he grumbled irritably.

"Well?" The redhead looked pointedly at the meal that was still sitting, uneaten, in front of him.

Hiko gave the food a somewhat nauseated look as his hangover reasserted itself. "I'm not really all that hungry right now," he muttered.

Kenshin's eyes widened briefly and then narrowed. "Oh no you don't..." he scowled. "I went through a lot of trouble to make you this breakfast! Do you have any idea how long it took me to do all this?" He turned the full weight of his glare on the hapless soup pot. "It seems that I have a weight limit to what I can carry, so it took me almost two hours to get enough water to cook everything with! And that doesn't even include the water I needed to wash all those dirty dishes _before_ I started cooking... and... and... Shishou, are you laughing at me?"

And indeed he was.

After the strain of the last two days, the sudden release of tension left Hiko almost lightheaded. He snickered... and then doubled over in hysterics at the affronted expression on his deshi's face, clutching his stomach, tears running freely down his face.

Kenshin stared. "Um... Shishou...?"

After a moment, the swordsman was finally able to get himself under control. "Baka deshi," he wheezed breathlessly, shaking his head in wonder. "Sometimes I forget just how entertaining you could be."

"Entertaining, am I?" the ghost muttered dryly. "Well, I'm _so_ glad that I'm able to provide you with so much amusement." Inwardly he smiled. He had to admit, it really was nice to see his master laugh again... even if it was at his expense. Kenshin suddenly grimaced.

Come to think of it... his master's laughter had _always_ been at his expense.

He blew out a small sigh, and then knelt, holding up the plate of onigiri. He gave his Shishou an expectant look. "Well, seeing as I put in so much effort to make these damn things, I really think the least you could do is try one."

Doubtfully, Hiko picked up a rice-ball and stared at it for a moment. Taking a wary bite, he sweat-dropped.

Kenshin deflated somewhat. "You don't like it?"

The swords-master swallowed the mouthful of rice. "It's um… not bad, I guess..." he hedged, attempting to be tactful for once. "Especially since I don't imagine you really had much opportunity to hone your cooking skills over the past several years."

The redhead stiffened, crestfallen expression turning defensive. "Well, what do you expect?" he muttered edgily, fists clenching in his lap. "I had… other things that took up most of my time."

"Oi, oi…" Hiko sighed, frustrated. _Damn moody brat_...

"Forgive the unsatisfactory meal," Kenshin continued, his words polite, his voice sarcastic. "Perhaps it would be best if you continued to eat as you've become accustomed. Though, if I remember correctly, your cooking was about as edible as the chopsticks I ate it with."

"Well, what exactly do you expect me to say? It's the truth, isn't it?"

"Maybe a little gratitude for my efforts?"

"Gratitude?" Hiko felt his headache flare, and along with it, his temper. "You want gratitude? Like the 'gratitude' you showed for _my_ efforts? Rescuing you from bandits… keeping you from going back to a life of slavery… training you… You show me gratitude by abandoning me and everything I taught you to become a murderer?" The older man stood, waving around the partially eaten rice-ball in his vehemence. "Seems to me, you just chose one form of slavery for another!"

Kenshin's eyes narrowed, expertly hiding his hurt, but inwardly admitting the truth of his master's words. "Maybe this was a bad idea," he muttered, rising to his feet. Whirling on his heel, he slipped through the door before Hiko could react.

"Dammit!" Hiko growled, one hand coming up to rub his face in his aggravation, the other dropping the onigiri to the ground.

_Stupid, stupid!_ _Real smooth there Seijuro_…

He sighed after a moment. So much for being ready for anything. Guess there was nothing to do now but wait for the idiot to get over his snit and come back. Headache back in full force, he sank back to the floor muffling a pained groan. The swords-master poked listlessly at the rest of the plate of onigiri. As a bit of a concession, he probably should try and eat some of it. Despite the taste, and how frustrating the boy had been, he supposed it _was_ quite an impressive feat for a ghost to put a meal together.

Briefly considering the rice-balls and his uneasy stomach, he turned his attention to the miso still steaming fragrantly in the bowl Kenshin had set out for him. After a cautious sip, he smiled faintly. This at least had turned out right. A plain, simple shiitake dashi with just a touch of onion. After all these years, his little baka deshi had remembered exactly how Hiko had liked it…

Finishing off the bowl, he felt a touch of remorse. Why had he blown up at Kenshin like that? Why had he gotten so angry? Hadn't they already gotten past this point after last night's mushy heart-to-heart crap? Guess there was still a bit of unanswered bitterness that needed to be resolved. He would have to work on that.

He ladled some more soup into his bowl as he waited for the moron to show himself.

Five minutes passed.

Then ten.

After twenty minutes of waiting (and two more bowls of soup), the uneasy feeling in his stomach hadn't quite faded, and had apparently decided to spread to another location altogether. He found himself on his feet, fingers clenched around the soup bowl hard enough to leave cracks. He made an effort to smother his growing apprehension with annoyance, and carefully set the cracked ceramic on a table.

"Where is the little brat?" he muttered to himself. "He'd better not be waiting for me to go out and actually apologize…" Still grumbling half-heartedly, the swordsman started towards the door.

Once outside of the cabin, he faltered, staring blankly at the empty yard.

Kenshin wasn't there. No sign of the little red-head at all.

_Shit_… did Kenshin _leave_? Had he really been driven away by their foolish, pointless argument?

Perhaps permanently…?

His stomach twisted, and for a moment Hiko felt the pain of loss as severely as he had in that room back in Kyoto.

No… Kenshin couldn't be _gone_. He had just gotten his deshi back, and he was _not_ about to lose him again this soon.

_Especially not over something as stupid as a goddamn riceball. _

Hiko was aware he'd have to face the eventuality of his deshi's parting sooner or later. He couldn't allow the ghost to haunt him forever; Kenshin's spirit needed to be put to rest.

Though not right away. Not so soon. It was selfish, but – and he cringed to admit it – Hiko _needed_ the boy's presence right now.

_Dammit, Kenshin… where the hell _are _you? _

With any luck, the little idiot had just stormed off to sulk somewhere. And if that were the case, then Hiko would just have to go find him and drag his ass back. Figuratively speaking, of course.

Uneasily glancing around, Hiko was at a loss. But, how to start? As a ghost, Kenshin had no physical trail to follow… no ki that Hiko could sense…

He supposed he _could_ just start yelling and see if the boy popped up, but that bespoke of a desperation he wasn't sure he wanted to reveal just yet.

Guess he'd have to try his deshi's favorite childhood hiding places and hope he got lucky.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Meanwhile, after some time to cool down, Kenshin had settled glumly on the roof of the cabin contemplating his own stupidity. Why had he gotten so defensive over something so meaningless?

_Such a childish response…_ The ghost shook his head. _I should be beyond such things by now. I probably _should_ go back down and apologize for my inexcusable behavior…_

After a fleeting pause to mull over the metaphysical ramifications of being able to actually remain on the roof without falling through, he started to jump down. There was another pause, as he saw Hiko suddenly step out through the door below him.

He hesitated further upon the aggravated expression on the man's face. Was his master still angry with him? He decided it was probably better to stay where he was until he could determine whether or not it was safe to come down.

Kenshin watched as Hiko studied his surroundings, the dark-haired man's expression shifting from annoyance to uncertainty… and then a quick flash of something that the ghost wasn't expecting.

Fear. For a brief moment, Hiko looked positively stricken.

Startled, Kenshin tried to puzzle out the reason for Hiko's sudden panic. What would _he _have to be frightened over? His master was scared of nothing! However, _something_ was obviously affecting the older man…

_Wait a minute…_ Kenshin blinked. _Could… could he actually be afraid that I left? _

Noticing his master turn and start to walk towards the woods, he finally spoke up.

"Shishou…"

"Kenshin!" Hiko froze, relieved at hearing the familiar voice, and glanced up at the figure perched on the edge of the roof. Taking a deep breath, he schooled his features into an irritated mask. "What the hell are you doing? Get down here!"

Kenshin quickly descended from the roof, cautiously approaching his teacher. He bowed his head. "I'm sorry, Shishou, for what I said. I don't know why I—"

Hiko broke in, ignoring the humility. "The soup was good," he muttered tersely, glowering at his errant pupil.

"What?" Kenshin was bewildered.

The swords-master's expression was defiant. "I _said_," he bit out. "The soup. Was good. Now are you coming back in? I'd prefer to finish my breakfast before lunchtime if possible."

The red-head blinked at what appeared to be an implied apology-of-sorts. "Are you sure you still want me?" he asked uncertainly.

"Want you?" Hiko stared at the downcast spirit. He rubbed at his forehead and frowned uncomfortably. "How can you even ask that after yesterday?"

Kenshin slumped. "I know… but, I'm just not sure if this is going to work…"

Hiko heaved a sigh, relenting up on his scowl a bit. "I know things are a little… weird right now, but you're giving up too easily, baka." He shot the ghost a challenging look. "That's not like you at all. It may take a little while to get used to it, but it's only as difficult as you make it out to be. Give it some time." He jerked his thumb towards the cabin. "Now, get your non-corporeal ass back in there before the soup gets cold."

"Hai, Shishou." Kenshin straightened, his eyes a little more determined as he followed his teacher through the door.

They would both give it time. They would take it slowly. It wasn't as if all their issues were expected to be resolved right away. There was so much that still needed to be said. So many things they needed to work through. Kenshin had not yet even mentioned his quest for redemption to his master; he had a feeling that neither of them was quite ready for that step just yet. Redemption could wait.

This was only the beginning, after all.

-Owari-

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A/N: So... this is the last chapter of Only the Beginning. I hope you've enjoyed the fic! I had originally planned on continuing this story with all their adventures and eventual conclusion, but I've decided this is a good stopping point. If/when I do ever decide to resume this story-line, it will be in a sequel. I've gone back over the previous chapters and fixed a few mistakes, got rid of some language, and tried to repair the stupid formatting screw-ups this site decided to grace us with. I'm sure I've probably missed something, but I'm too tired to really care at the moment.

A major shout-out to my friend and beta, SiriusFan13, whose support has been invaluable. You have her to thank for this chapter finally being ready to post. Thanks for the kick in the ass! :P

Glossary of terms: 

genpuku – coming of age ceremony

shiitake – type of Japanese mushroom

dashi – soup stock


End file.
